(no subject)
Title: Evolution of a Relationship
Author: Jennie
Summary: A relationship blossoms, all because of a promise.
Characters: Zach Parise and Travis Zajac of the New Jersey Devils, with mentions of Jordan Parise of the Lowell Devils.
Rating: PG-13, if only for plot line.
Disclaimer: As much as I wish I did, I don't own Travis, or Zach, or Jordan, or anything else mentioned in this fic. :)
A/N: When I refer to ‘up north,’ I mean extreme north Jersey, in cow country. Dover is an urban NYC suburb in NJ.
Young Noah: Would you just stay with me?
Young Allie: Stay with you? What for? Look at us, we're already fightin'
Young Noah: Well that's what we do, we fight... You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.
Young Allie: So what?
Young Noah: So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day. Will you do something for me, please? Just picture your life for me? 30 years from now, 40 years from now? What's it look like? If it's with him, go. Go! I lost you once, I think I can do it again. If I thought that's what you really wanted. But don't you take the easy way out.
Young Allie: What easy way? There is no easy way. No matter what I do, somebody gets hurt.
Young Noah: Would you stop thinking about what everyone wants? Stop thinking about what I want, what he wants, what your parents want. What do YOU want? What do you WANT?
--
He was friends with your brother. Your brother called you the night before training camp began and made you promise that you’d take care of him and keep him under your wing. You’d been to some of your brother’s college games and met him briefly, but you’d never actually met him. Introductions were made and hands shook, but he rushed off quickly and disappeared from your memory. Despite that, your brother’s friends gave him a glowing report, on both his personality and looks, and you took their words to heart. The first day of training camp, you were sitting on the bench in front of your locker and saw him. He was tall, over six feet, and had his hands stuffed into his pockets. Large brown eyes searched the room for a familiar face and stopped on you. You locked eyes for a moment before he smiled and walked over. “Are you Zach?” You nodded in agreement, before he extended a hand and introduced himself as Travis.
You’d always had a tendency to rush into things too soon. Someone would flirt with you and you’d make plans about how your wedding would be. But with Travis, it was always different. You were around each other so often that you could only live in the present. You never had any preconceived notions about your relationship, and it seemed as though he never expected much from you. You had always thought that to him, you were his ticket to freedom. You had the car, the knowledge, the connections.
The two of you ended up spending all of your time together, and soon, you realized he was with you not because of your car, but because he wanted to be where you were. You went to the state fair to watch the pig races, a flea market in Dover, even down the shore in November. With Travis, it became less about an obligation and more about a friendship. You’d share ice cream sundaes, plates of Linguini, and 6 packs of Molson. Team mates would joke about how much time you spent together, but you’d look at each other, shrug it off, and go out to eat.
One night, you drove to a small Chinese restaurant up north and got caught in a traffic jam on the highway. You’d been stopped for several minutes when Travis leaned over and kissed you quickly on the cheek. You looked over at him, but he had already gone back to looking out of the window. “Travis,” you said softly, “I liked that.” He turned to face you, a large smile on his face, and that’s when you knew. You knew that this, your relationship, was going to be more than a promise you made to your brother. This was going to be something that would change your life, something that would make you want to wake up every morning. This was going to be something good.
Over time, he became comfortable in New Jersey. He bought a condo across the street from you so that you could still play chauffeur, and he began giving you directions to restaurants he’d taken taxis to. By Christmas, your relationship had settled in. Playful flirting was replaced with anger-laced insults. You began sitting on opposite sides of the couch instead of beside one another. Two plates of linguini were ordered instead of one. Even so, he was the only person you wanted to be with, and he still held you in his arms when the heat in your condo shut off for the night. You’d fight, but inevitably, one of you would come back and apologize. There was never any question that the other would walk away, that your relationship would end. You knew that both of you were in this for the count, and nothing would come between you. The fights seemed to strengthen your love, the apologies let you know, and let him know, that each of you cared too much to let what you had die away.
And then, it happened. It wasn’t something you planned; it isn’t something anyone ever plans. No one plans that they’ll want to be in someone’s arms, that they’ll have this unending need to kiss someone. No one writes in their schedule that they’re going to be spending every moment they can with someone. No one plans to fall in love, but it happens anyway.
You were thinking one evening about everything he’d done for you, everything he’d do for you, and you realized it. He was cooking dinner, and you came up behind him. He was startled when you dug your hands into his pants pocket, but relaxed and closed his eyes, tilting his head back so it rested on your shoulder. You leaned in and whispered in his ear, “I love you.” You saw his cheeks tighten into a smile and you lightly kissed his jaw. He said, so softly you had to strain to hear him, “I’ve always loved you.”
Two months later, you were still hiding your relationship from your team mates, and the struggle of covering your tracks, of letting go of your hands just before the locker room door, of not embracing as long as you’d like to after a goal, had begun to take its toll on you. One night after a game, you were sitting at the kitchen table, watching as Travis finished the grilled cheese sandwich he’d made himself, when you mentioned coming out to the team. He looked at you incredulously and laughed at first, then stopped as soon as he saw you were serious.
“Zach, we can’t do that. Do you know how badly that would ruin our careers? We’d be shunned.”
“Who cares? Wouldn’t you feel liberated?”
“You’re being ridiculous. I’m not even going to talk about this with you.”
You took his hand, more out of instinct than from an actual plan to win him back, but he writhed under your touch and crossed his arms in front of his chest.
“Don’t touch me.”
“Come on, don’t be like that.”
“Don’t touch me! You always think that what you believe is right, that you can do anything. Well, you’re not perfect. We won’t last a day if people find out.”
“Isn’t what we have more important than that? Who cares what they think. We’ll have each other. Think about that; we’ll be able to walk around in public, and not have to worry about being caught. We can kiss in public, eat at a fancy restaurant, do anything we want. Don’t you want that?”
“I have to go.”
You reached out and held on to Travis's arm, spinning him around so that you were face to face. “No. I’m not letting you go that easily, because I love you. We’re going to have to work at this, because nothing comes easily. But I want you. I want all of you. I want to hold on to you at night, I want to hold your hand when we’re walking down the street, I want to kiss you and love you and hold you and do anything a normal couple would do. I want to buy a couch with you, go food shopping, dance at a wedding. I want to sit at our kitchen table and eat Lucky Charms with you. I want to wake up with you beside me. I want to be with you, and I’ll do whatever it takes to make this work, because I’ve never wanted anything more in my entire life.”
He looked at you in silence, eyes wide and mouth gaping, then whispered softly, "I have to go." You loosened your grip on his arms and he walked down the stairs, not bothering to look back. You looked the way he walked out: down the stairs and out the door. Then, you opened the door to your condo and slumped onto your couch.
You left early the next morning for Dallas to play in the Youngstars game, and, by the time you sat in your seat on the plane ride to Tampa four days later, your cell phone’s inbox still had no new messages. You slept through the flight and dreamt of you and Travis lying on a beach in Cancun, sipping Pina Coladas in the bright sunlight. He looked at you, smiled, and told you how much he loved you, then a sudden jolt woke you from the dream and you opened your eyes to see the plane had arrived at the gate.
You walked hastily through security, wanting to be home, surrounded by the safety of the hotel’s Egyptian cotton sheets, when you heard someone call your name. You looked up, and there Travis stood, his hands jammed in his pants pockets and a small smile on his face. He walked up to you and, slinging your bag over his shoulder, embraced you. He pulled away after a few seconds and cupped your face in his hands, before connecting his lips with yours. Travellers bustled around you, but neither of you seemed to notice. It was as if it was only you and Travis in the airport, only you and Travis in the world. “I never want to lose you,” he said forcefully. He grinned, and raised his arms to the sky, then shouted, “I love this man!”
Several people stopped and stared, and you blushed, then slapped his arm and exclaimed, “What are you doing?!”
He looked at you with a smile and wrapped his arms around you, then whispered in your ear, “Showing you how much I want you.”
That night, Travis held you in his arms and told you he’d never let you go. He told you that you were the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, and that he wanted you more than anything he’d ever wanted in his life. When you met in the hotel lobby the next morning, you stuffed your hand in your pockets and listened as Marty told stories of what happened at the All-Star game. Travis looked at you and walked over, then touched your arm and entwined his fingers with yours. John looked over and smiled, Scotty said, “It’s about damn time,” and Colin, who everyone knew was homophobic, said, “You guys didn’t hide it very well.”
All that time, you’d been concerned about what other people would think. You’d been worried about what they would think rather than the toll it would take on your relationship. Maybe hiding all those weeks made your relationship stronger. Maybe it gave you the knowledge that your relationship could be put through any test and still survive. Either way, you’d come out stronger.
You’d made your brother promises over the years: don’t date someone with a kid, don’t get involved in a long distance relationship, and don’t tell mom about how the hole in the basement got there. You’d kept some of those promises and you’d broken some of those promises. Sometimes in bed at night, you think about what would have happened if you hadn’t kept your brother’s promise, if you’d ignored Travis during training camp instead of letting him follow you around. But then, you roll over and pull him closer to you, and thank the heavens that you’d kept your promise.
--
I'm going to be completely honest, I have no clue where this came from. I was watching I Shouldn't Be Alive and had a sudden burst of ficspiration. It was written before I had any thought of who the pairing was going to be, and then it just fit into Parijac. Also, because I know them the best, so I could develop their characters better. This is 100% based on The Notebook. :D I have to say, this is one of those fics that I just love to read. It's a format that I've rarely used, but I felt like it was suited for this type of fic. Oh, and the 'don't date someone with a kid' is a jab at the rumour that Zach dated Theresa Lantessi (sp?), who's 33 years old and has a child. :P Let me know what you think, as always. :)