(no subject)
the end of high school just struck me some time today or this week.. wow only one more year before i enter the 'real world'.. i kind of want to go back and be a little kid again, scince my parents were divoriced since i was 2, that would be a good experiance.. anyways im going to get a roomate or two when i turn 18 so i can move out, girls you are allways welcome :) .. also im quiting my job at Guidos.. cant have a new start with out a new job... soo im still trying to get over my problems and im gona get all 'emo....' soo yeh.. i still cant belive my mom picked her husband over her own son even when hes not my father but if she values her fucked up pretend marraige to some jackass over me so be it , i have no controll over that.. like alot of other things.. fuck.. i feel like i have a part of me that doesnt exist anymore, as if ive been silenced and have not been able to by myself.. it feels like im missing something, the only thing ive been thinging about these past few weeks is that.. all i know is i fucked things up and now its to late in my eyes to try and fix things.. that fact really hurts.. but i must go on everyone who has a life goes through the same stuff more or less, and they all seem to be normal and ok.. i duno i pray that everything turns out for the good.. for both of us.