Damn it...what to do?
What to do? I love my friends...every single damn one...but some...make me feel like true and utter shit sometimes....I mean i feel so bad, i feel not human. But why dont I say anything? Why? Instead I smile and make jokes, and take it all in. My insides look like they ran through god damn razor wire.... Hmmm...what the fucks god damn wrong me? And ladies......you piss me off....."Ohhh I dont judge by looks," the fuck you dont! You're all the same, admit, I do. I like girls that I....I...think are attractive ok? Brady and Ian think Milla J. looks gross, but I dont. her petite body is beauty, and I love those damn damn EYES!...I dunno...Im just like super tired of my damn heart being stepped on and broken...im tired of having to be the stong one and hold it the fuck in! You know what that does? Forces me to come home every night filled with anger and hate! And over girls >.< m so tired of it.....im so damn tired of feeling horrible every day and night! ALL THE TIME!!! People "I love you," all that bullshit I hear in LHS fuck you! Only a hand full know what "love" is that rest of fucking morons. And some that know what "love" is are still fucking morons! Gah! I am tired of them, those cute little fucks, fuck you prick fucks! Rot in Hell with your false love, fuck you!.....as you can see Im fucking bitter, guess what.....I am bitter, i am angry, and I am fucking lonely! So fuck off! Fucking tired of not being me....having to hide who I am and what I like, of who I like! Just becuase my fucking "friends" cant accept it....so guess what Fuck OFFFFFFF! Bunch of fucking douches! I hate people...there are only a few people I like now.......good job! To all of you pricks, fucks, whore, sluts, bitches, and people who make me fucking feel like a worthless bastard....thanks....fuck you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ................
Song of the day-
Rolling Stones-
I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
I see a line of cars and they're all painted black
With flowers and my love, both never to come back
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a newborn baby it just happens ev'ryday
I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door and it has been painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away and not have to face the facts
It's not easy facing up when your whole world is black
No more will my green sea go turn a deeper blue
I could not forsee this thing happening to you
If I look hard enough into the setting sun
My love will laugh with me before the morning comes
I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
Hmm, hmm, hmm...
I wanna see it painted black, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun, blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black
Yeah
Song of the day-
Rolling Stones-
I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
I see a line of cars and they're all painted black
With flowers and my love, both never to come back
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a newborn baby it just happens ev'ryday
I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door and it has been painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away and not have to face the facts
It's not easy facing up when your whole world is black
No more will my green sea go turn a deeper blue
I could not forsee this thing happening to you
If I look hard enough into the setting sun
My love will laugh with me before the morning comes
I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
Hmm, hmm, hmm...
I wanna see it painted black, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun, blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black
Yeah