drink up babydoll.. tell me are you in or are you out?

[x3so_i_thought]

so tonight what used to be a crush has been recycled into pure hatred..

tonight i'll douse the tears with liquor..

tonight i'll put away the blade and fight back the urge..

tonight i'll start caring about myself..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tonight i'll burn my memory along with several yellow pieces of paper n ink..

tonight i'll throw my heart into that fire..

tonight i'll no longer just be temperature cold..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tonight i'll stop reaching for a hand..

tonight i'll stop feeding off of moments that felt like more..

tonight i'll learn i'm better than that..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tonight i'll play with my cat and let his claws gouge my skin instead of blades..

tonight i'll throw away this sick excuse for insanity..

tonight i'll cry myself to sleep with purring in my ear as my only sense of comfort..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tonight i'll make it be enough..

tonight i'll take nyquill to fucking fall asleep..

tonight i'll turn lust into lothe..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tonight i'll pick up the jagged pieces, whatever are left..

tonight i'll put them away for someone who truly wants me..

tonight i'll save them for someone who believes in more than moments..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tonight i'll shiver under the blankets continuing to wish..

tonight i'll count how many days since i've taken a single vitamin..

tonight i'll realize that i am destroying myself..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tonight i'll change my mind a million times..

tonight i'll try my fucking hardest to convince myself i'm strong enough to hate..

tonight i'll die even more inside..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tonight i'll break a c.d. intitled miss kelly's cd..

tonight i'll break a bond..

tonight i'll break free..

tonight i'll continue to hate..

tomorrows are no more..
tonight is where i stand..

god i cannot stop crying.. please god help me..