(no subject)

[x1989]

so this is what's happening.
i need to change
now, asap, whatever.

nicholas is giong to be the fucking death of me.
this past week has been hell. literally.
we broke up and got back together twice.
wtf
he is taking me for fucking granted and i dont appreciate it.
it's not fair.
he can break my heart as much as he wants and i still go running back to him.
what happened to me.
this is not fair.
i hate this
i what he has turned me into
vonerable, unappreciated, unloved, pos.

im lying not all of the time.just sometimes.
the other day i woke up, he was hung over from st pattys day
i wanted to WALK over and coook him food,
i cooked, waited, waited,waited for HIM to call me when he was ready for ME to WALK over to his house to take care of him
what did he do?
he had to fix his cousins car and then work.
wtf.
how shitty did i feel huh.
its not fair

he is going to stl tmrw and staying all weekend.
there are going to be somechanges once he gets home
let me teeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllll you
i will be a new woman.

new car, new job, new friends, new attitude REAL soon.