(no subject)
Well lets see.. i've been doing a lot of thinking lately, i'm so sick of living to make other people happy because in the end i just get fucked. So now its time to make amy happy... i dont really care what other people think i should do... its my life and i'm going to live it how i want to... not how other people want me to live it. I am not going to college.. it has never been what i want to do. It just doesn't interest me. Maybe i will later on in life... but right now not so much. The only way i will is if me and leanne actually go to Vancouver and do our Transcriptionist course. What i really want to do is travel. As soon as i am done saving up for merrit i am going to start saving up to go to Cuba. I also want to learn how to play the guitar.. and hopefully be as good as Jim is one day. I want to learn how to snowboard. I want to get a tattoo with leanne. I know i'm only 18 but i really do want to settle down. Get my own house, get a dog, get married and have a family. I've been thinking about this so much lately. I am actually ready. Its not like i'm going to try to get pregnant... but if it did happen i would be totally ok with it. I might even go up North with Clint. I want to experiance everything. God put me on this earth to explore it.. and thats what i am going to do. I also really want Clint to take me to Africa one day. Maybe even live down there for a little while to. I just dont want to stay here and let my life pass me by... thats what i feel i have been doing lately. I also want to mend some broken friendships. The other day me clint travis and cori went to jims house. Jason was there and we hung out for the first time in ever. I actually realized how much i missed him. I feel so bad for hurting him... i wish i could go back in time and take it back. But i cant and i hope that he can get over that and we can still be friends... he ment the world to me... we went through a lot during the summer. I miss all of the old crew... those were some of the best times i have ever had. Russel and Ryan live right next door... and yet i never see them. I just cant wait until summer when we all start hanging out again. I spend a lot of my time at Cori's house lately... its actually really awsome. Cori and Travis are like brother and sister to me... i can talk to both of them about anything and i know that they will never judge me. They are more my family than my mom and dad... its actually kind of sad.. but i have come to accept it. I really hope that those two get married... they are so happy together.. it makes me sick lol. 19 days until I take leanne to vancouver for her surprise... i am so excited shes going to love it!