Life goes on and I'm fading away..
I seriously have not been this sad in a long time. Everything is really upsetting me lately. One of my closest friends is having a mega hard time right now, and I'm not so sure as to how I can help her get through this,, but I'm the only one she told and I wont tell anyone either. and apparently Jeremy likes to drink and party. so I guess I'll be a part of his life if he has time to make me a priority. I'm so tired of being with boys that are selfish, and immature. When I look at Jeremy I see him as a totally great guy, but if he drinks as much as it seems, I mean.... can you blame him? If he has always liked to get drunk and party, why would he want to change that all for a girl? If I was into all that,, I'm not so sure I'd change for a boy either. so we'll just have to wait this one out and see where it takes us.
I'm so moody. My best friend in the whole world just made a stupid joke this morning, and a few of my other close friends laughed with her. I know she didnt mean anything by it, but it just hurts sometimes, ya know?
And this whole college thing is really stressing me out. Mkay., so I AM going to Laurel Business Institute for cosmetology starting next fall. and I know a lot of people who do hair as a career, and there's always a huge quantity of positions available for it.
Why? because nobody wants to stand on their feet that long.
And.. I am so dumb, seriously. I didnt know what a hail mary was in football, I used to think there were golden retrievers on the team, and there have been so many other incidences where I've just been downright stupid. why am I so stupid?
I could so try to tell myself that I'm smart, and I have. but what is the use, really? My gpa and past grades beg to differ. and what else thats stupid of me is that I'm basing my self worth on what others think of me. And like.. I can be in a room with one of my friends, and I just feel like they're constantly judging me.
And I've been crying a lot lately,
because I used to be so close to Brittany
and Kelly. but now that they are close
to each other..its babye krisie.
.............and that really makes me sad. because I love both of them more than they apparently like me. like when they're together, they completely ignore me. for instance, for half of the game on Friday.. I didnt say a word to either of them, because I was waiting for them to talk to me. that lasted til like HALF TIME. and I was like going crazy. they dont even realize they ignore me! .. and I dont have the heart to tell them that I'm hurt and that I miss them.
and here I am tearing up again. in class.
how classy. kbye.
I'm so moody. My best friend in the whole world just made a stupid joke this morning, and a few of my other close friends laughed with her. I know she didnt mean anything by it, but it just hurts sometimes, ya know?
And this whole college thing is really stressing me out. Mkay., so I AM going to Laurel Business Institute for cosmetology starting next fall. and I know a lot of people who do hair as a career, and there's always a huge quantity of positions available for it.
Why? because nobody wants to stand on their feet that long.
And.. I am so dumb, seriously. I didnt know what a hail mary was in football, I used to think there were golden retrievers on the team, and there have been so many other incidences where I've just been downright stupid. why am I so stupid?
I could so try to tell myself that I'm smart, and I have. but what is the use, really? My gpa and past grades beg to differ. and what else thats stupid of me is that I'm basing my self worth on what others think of me. And like.. I can be in a room with one of my friends, and I just feel like they're constantly judging me.
And I've been crying a lot lately,
because I used to be so close to Brittany
and Kelly. but now that they are close
to each other..its babye krisie.
.............and that really makes me sad. because I love both of them more than they apparently like me. like when they're together, they completely ignore me. for instance, for half of the game on Friday.. I didnt say a word to either of them, because I was waiting for them to talk to me. that lasted til like HALF TIME. and I was like going crazy. they dont even realize they ignore me! .. and I dont have the heart to tell them that I'm hurt and that I miss them.
and here I am tearing up again. in class.
how classy. kbye.