*Can We Pretend That Airplanes In The Night Sky Are Like Shooting Stars?
I could really use a wish right now, but in all honesty I really could.
For years. I mean YEARS, I thought that Chris was the one for me. The one I'd marry. Never felt it as much as it only seemed right. We were together for so long it was one of those things where it was like okay. Eventually we'll get married. Have a couple babies. Hopefully live comfortably. Maybe not absolutely perfectly. But comfortably.
So when we had broke up two years ago it was only rightfully so that my whole perspective on life had changed. Things that used to be important to me were no longer relivant. I decided that if I ever were to get pregnant, it didn't mean I'd have to marry that man. I decided that getting married and having babies wasn't my only goal in life anymore. I decided that it was more important to get my shit together and grow up.
Well that last goal is still happening. I'm still learning. Still have all my hopes, dreams, and fears.
I just recently lost the one guy that since the day I've met him, I've wanted to be with. Funny how that works. You meet somebody and it's like an instant spark. You know they're the one for you, and then you sit there for years wondering if they feel the same way only to eventually be burned. Mike really was my number one. He really was the one guy that I thought I'd never be without. There wasn't a amount of time that created this feeling. This was a right off the bat, he's the one for me feeling.
Basically he has alot of his own problems, and dealing with trying to hold a relationship together with all the other stuff he's got going on just isn't going to work. It's something I've accepted. I'm wondering still if he's even accepted it honestly but atleast I know where I stand.
If I could trade all the years I had with Chris to just have spent them with Mike. I would've. To have never met Chris would've changed me a bit, but I probally still would've met Mike. I'd never take back meeting Mike. He will forever hold a special place in my heart. If we could sort thru everything right now, I'd take him back in a heartbeat. Moving on from him probally won't happen for quite some time. But atleast I know that my one and only is out there someplace. Chasing his dream. Trying to be a rockstar and be famous. I really hope he gets to live the life. I hope nothing but the best for him.
I love him. I'll always love him. Somethings are just meant to be<3
For years. I mean YEARS, I thought that Chris was the one for me. The one I'd marry. Never felt it as much as it only seemed right. We were together for so long it was one of those things where it was like okay. Eventually we'll get married. Have a couple babies. Hopefully live comfortably. Maybe not absolutely perfectly. But comfortably.
So when we had broke up two years ago it was only rightfully so that my whole perspective on life had changed. Things that used to be important to me were no longer relivant. I decided that if I ever were to get pregnant, it didn't mean I'd have to marry that man. I decided that getting married and having babies wasn't my only goal in life anymore. I decided that it was more important to get my shit together and grow up.
Well that last goal is still happening. I'm still learning. Still have all my hopes, dreams, and fears.
I just recently lost the one guy that since the day I've met him, I've wanted to be with. Funny how that works. You meet somebody and it's like an instant spark. You know they're the one for you, and then you sit there for years wondering if they feel the same way only to eventually be burned. Mike really was my number one. He really was the one guy that I thought I'd never be without. There wasn't a amount of time that created this feeling. This was a right off the bat, he's the one for me feeling.
Basically he has alot of his own problems, and dealing with trying to hold a relationship together with all the other stuff he's got going on just isn't going to work. It's something I've accepted. I'm wondering still if he's even accepted it honestly but atleast I know where I stand.
If I could trade all the years I had with Chris to just have spent them with Mike. I would've. To have never met Chris would've changed me a bit, but I probally still would've met Mike. I'd never take back meeting Mike. He will forever hold a special place in my heart. If we could sort thru everything right now, I'd take him back in a heartbeat. Moving on from him probally won't happen for quite some time. But atleast I know that my one and only is out there someplace. Chasing his dream. Trying to be a rockstar and be famous. I really hope he gets to live the life. I hope nothing but the best for him.
I love him. I'll always love him. Somethings are just meant to be<3