Ahhh your note was the best. The absolute best. I totally know where your coming from. It's always the same with guys "You have the most fucking coolest personality" and then "You're a great friend, I'd never want to lose that." I hate that so much. I think maybe we feel that we have to have a "fucking cool/rad" personality so that we won't just be another face in the crowd.. and that we act more like guys becuase we want one ourselves.. but they just see us as one of the guys. So did we skip the step where were not one of the guys and they do want us? And how the hell do you get to that step. I know that's how it is, becuase of the way you and I talk. Were not like normal girls who keep their mouths shut and just 'scope out the hot dudes'. We go up to those 'hot dudes' and make fun of them, but they laugh cause were funny or whatever the case. So now we have gotten to the part that we are one of the guys, but how the hell do we become the significant other to the guy? i dont understand. im in the tenth grade and i have never been kissed. i have been hugged three times by a guy, ive danced twice with a guy and nothing else. the majority of those numbers happened in the past six months. maybe im progressing but that has nothing to do with this. thank you emily for the note and it really made me feel better. as i was writing that entry, i knew that you would leave me a note and so i kept checking my lj back and forth to see if you said anything. and you did. and knowing how amazing you are, you left the note i expected. and im so glad that we are still in contact, because you make my cloudy nights, into starry nights. i love you emily. you are so beautiful.
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