Running to Stand Still (Prologue - Chapter 2)
Title: Running to Stand Still
Author: x0_aquarius_x0
Rating: R
Pairing: Kurt/Blaine
Spoilers: Starts with 3.01 and goes AU from there
Warnings: Dark. Angsty. Some adult themes.
Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I'm only borrowing them for a little while.
Summary: He tries to remember the last time he was happy, and all he can picture is red piping on a navy blue blazer. He never would have thought that taking off that blazer would be the beginning of the end.
Running to Stand Still - Prologue
February 2012
It's quiet.
It was loud for a while.
Sirens. Yelling. Questions.
The clink of handcuffs that barely even registered against his skin. Car doors slamming. Building doors slamming.
More yelling. More questions. So many questions.
Then, the loudest sound yet. The crash of metal on metal. Iron bars locking into place. That sound echoed for a while.
But now it's quiet.
So quiet that he can hear the drip of a leaky pipe in the corner. So quiet that the snoring from down the hall sounds close. So quiet that he can hear each one of his breaths and every heartbeat.
He stands there for a while. He's not sure how long because his watch and his cell phone are gone.
Everything's gone.
After another while, his heart starts to race. He sweats and shivers. He aches in a way that he can't quite place.
Nausea hurtles at him full force and he vomits all over his feet. He collapses to the cement floor that's just as cold and hard as it looks.
The vomiting stops, but the shaking and sweating don't. His heart pounds. He's too exhausted to close his eyes. His skin is crawling and he has to get out of here but he can't move and even if he could he wouldn't have anywhere to go.
It's so quiet.
It hurts.
He tries to remember the last time he was happy, and all he can picture is red piping on a navy blue blazer.
Blaine never would have thought that taking off that blazer would be the beginning of the end.
Running to Stand Still - Chapter 1
August 2011
"I want to transfer to McKinley High School."
Blaine and his parents have been seated at the dinner table for less than 2 minutes when he blurts out the statement that is the reason for his rare weekday appearance.
His father stabs a piece of steak with his fork. "Why?"
The true answer (because I love Kurt and simply can't bear being away from him) is not the answer his parents want to hear. No, Blaine knows the answers his parents want to hear. And he's ready to dish them out. "Dalton has served its purpose for me," he begins calmly. "It's been a safe environment. I've learned a lot and appreciated my time there. But I feel that I have a lot of growing to do before I get to college, and I'm not confident that Dalton is the best place for that."
"What do you mean?" his mother asks. "Dalton is a wonderful school."
"I won't argue that. But I'd like to attend a major university in a couple of years. Dalton is small and sheltered. Going from Dalton to a large college would be a big leap. A larger school like McKinley could be the perfect stepping stone in between." (And Kurt goes there. Did I mention that Kurt goes there?)
His father takes a sip from his wine glass. "Perhaps. On the other hand, the major universities would favor an application from a Dalton student over a public school student, right?"
"McKinley has a solid college preparatory program. Since it's a bigger school, they offer more advanced placement classes. More than twice as many as Dalton, as a matter of fact."
"But Blaine," his mother says, "what about the bullying? You said it yourself. Dalton is safe. Do you really think a different public school would be better than last time?"
"I do. First of all, I know the students at McKinley." (KURT!) "They're welcoming. The school has a good grasp on getting bullying under control. Second of all, I'm older. More mature. I've learned a thing or two about standing up for myself."
Predictably, his father is the next to speak. This is like a two-against-one tennis match. "McKinley is almost half an hour away. Why not try one of the schools around here?"
"None of them have a glee club. I've really enjoyed being in the Warblers, and I'd like to be a part of McKinley's glee club as well." (With Kurt!) "McKinley is a school of choice, so all I need is your signature on the application that I already filled out. Plus, I checked to make sure that all of my credits transfer. They do."
"And you want to live at home again?" his mother asks.
This is the question he's dreading the most. "As long as you are both willing to have me back again, yes, I'd like to live here." It almost feels like the truth.
His father wipes his mouth on his napkin. "It seems like you've thought this out thoroughly."
Blaine nods. "I have. It seems like the best option for me."
"There would have to be a few conditions, of course," his father says, taking another sip of wine.
Blaine hides a wince. "Of course. Such as…"
"Such as you go to church with us every Sunday morning. You're home by 10:00 on school nights and midnight on weekends. You don't have any…boys," his father almost chokes on the word, "over without our permission."
"Sounds acceptable." He can worry about those later.
"Good. Well, your mother and I will have to discuss this. Give us until the morning."
"Absolutely."
The next morning, he has the signed application in his hands.
He writes the ominous feeling in the pit of his stomach off as nerves.
Running to Stand Still - Chapter 2
February 2012
"Blaine Anderson?"
It takes him longer than it probably should to realize that the men are talking to him.
"Let's go."
The words mean nothing to Blaine. All he can focus on is the ache in his stomach, the pounding in his chest, the way he can't stop shaking. When he doesn't respond, the two men hoist him up by his elbows.
"Kid smells like shit and vomit," one of the men grunts.
"Let's shower him before transport," the other man says.
A cramp jolts through Blaine's abdomen, and he whimpers.
"Good idea. Can you walk, son?"
They drag him between them like his feet aren't even touching the floor. They enter a small room, strip him down, and shove him under a spray of lukewarm water.
"Soap, kid," one of the men says. "Use it."
But all Blaine knows is that his skin stops crawling and the shivers don't feel strong enough to shatter bones. The water runs as he doubles over with the pain of another cramp.
Eventually, they pull him out, dry him off, and shove him into dry clothes.
Not his clothes.
His stomach twists, and the clothes aren't clean for very long.
There are handcuffs on his wrists and vomit on his skin and he can't feel worse but he does. His heart is going to explode and he's dizzy and hot and cold and everything hurts and he's terrified and he can't breathe.
He hears someone screaming.
It might be him.
Everything goes black.
"Mr. Anderson?" a voice calls. "Blaine, open your eyes."
He does, and a bright light crosses his field of vision.
"Pupils are still sluggish," the voice says. "Mr. Anderson, do you know where you are?"
He's in a bed. His hands and feet are strapped down. There are tubes everywhere. The voice is a doctor. Next to the doctor is a nurse.
"I don't think we're going to get much response out of him," the doctor says. "Call me if anything changes."
The doctor leaves. The nurse approaches Blaine's bed. She adjusts the blanket covering his legs. She wipes his runny nose with a tissue. "How are you feeling?" she asks.
Not good. But not the worst.
"How'd you get yourself in such bad shape, huh?"
She gently pushes one of his curls off his forehead. He trembles when the action reminds him of Kurt.
It hurts so much.
Chapter 3 - Chapter 5
Author: x0_aquarius_x0
Rating: R
Pairing: Kurt/Blaine
Spoilers: Starts with 3.01 and goes AU from there
Warnings: Dark. Angsty. Some adult themes.
Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. I'm only borrowing them for a little while.
Summary: He tries to remember the last time he was happy, and all he can picture is red piping on a navy blue blazer. He never would have thought that taking off that blazer would be the beginning of the end.
Running to Stand Still - Prologue
February 2012
It's quiet.
It was loud for a while.
Sirens. Yelling. Questions.
The clink of handcuffs that barely even registered against his skin. Car doors slamming. Building doors slamming.
More yelling. More questions. So many questions.
Then, the loudest sound yet. The crash of metal on metal. Iron bars locking into place. That sound echoed for a while.
But now it's quiet.
So quiet that he can hear the drip of a leaky pipe in the corner. So quiet that the snoring from down the hall sounds close. So quiet that he can hear each one of his breaths and every heartbeat.
He stands there for a while. He's not sure how long because his watch and his cell phone are gone.
Everything's gone.
After another while, his heart starts to race. He sweats and shivers. He aches in a way that he can't quite place.
Nausea hurtles at him full force and he vomits all over his feet. He collapses to the cement floor that's just as cold and hard as it looks.
The vomiting stops, but the shaking and sweating don't. His heart pounds. He's too exhausted to close his eyes. His skin is crawling and he has to get out of here but he can't move and even if he could he wouldn't have anywhere to go.
It's so quiet.
It hurts.
He tries to remember the last time he was happy, and all he can picture is red piping on a navy blue blazer.
Blaine never would have thought that taking off that blazer would be the beginning of the end.
Running to Stand Still - Chapter 1
August 2011
"I want to transfer to McKinley High School."
Blaine and his parents have been seated at the dinner table for less than 2 minutes when he blurts out the statement that is the reason for his rare weekday appearance.
His father stabs a piece of steak with his fork. "Why?"
The true answer (because I love Kurt and simply can't bear being away from him) is not the answer his parents want to hear. No, Blaine knows the answers his parents want to hear. And he's ready to dish them out. "Dalton has served its purpose for me," he begins calmly. "It's been a safe environment. I've learned a lot and appreciated my time there. But I feel that I have a lot of growing to do before I get to college, and I'm not confident that Dalton is the best place for that."
"What do you mean?" his mother asks. "Dalton is a wonderful school."
"I won't argue that. But I'd like to attend a major university in a couple of years. Dalton is small and sheltered. Going from Dalton to a large college would be a big leap. A larger school like McKinley could be the perfect stepping stone in between." (And Kurt goes there. Did I mention that Kurt goes there?)
His father takes a sip from his wine glass. "Perhaps. On the other hand, the major universities would favor an application from a Dalton student over a public school student, right?"
"McKinley has a solid college preparatory program. Since it's a bigger school, they offer more advanced placement classes. More than twice as many as Dalton, as a matter of fact."
"But Blaine," his mother says, "what about the bullying? You said it yourself. Dalton is safe. Do you really think a different public school would be better than last time?"
"I do. First of all, I know the students at McKinley." (KURT!) "They're welcoming. The school has a good grasp on getting bullying under control. Second of all, I'm older. More mature. I've learned a thing or two about standing up for myself."
Predictably, his father is the next to speak. This is like a two-against-one tennis match. "McKinley is almost half an hour away. Why not try one of the schools around here?"
"None of them have a glee club. I've really enjoyed being in the Warblers, and I'd like to be a part of McKinley's glee club as well." (With Kurt!) "McKinley is a school of choice, so all I need is your signature on the application that I already filled out. Plus, I checked to make sure that all of my credits transfer. They do."
"And you want to live at home again?" his mother asks.
This is the question he's dreading the most. "As long as you are both willing to have me back again, yes, I'd like to live here." It almost feels like the truth.
His father wipes his mouth on his napkin. "It seems like you've thought this out thoroughly."
Blaine nods. "I have. It seems like the best option for me."
"There would have to be a few conditions, of course," his father says, taking another sip of wine.
Blaine hides a wince. "Of course. Such as…"
"Such as you go to church with us every Sunday morning. You're home by 10:00 on school nights and midnight on weekends. You don't have any…boys," his father almost chokes on the word, "over without our permission."
"Sounds acceptable." He can worry about those later.
"Good. Well, your mother and I will have to discuss this. Give us until the morning."
"Absolutely."
The next morning, he has the signed application in his hands.
He writes the ominous feeling in the pit of his stomach off as nerves.
Running to Stand Still - Chapter 2
February 2012
"Blaine Anderson?"
It takes him longer than it probably should to realize that the men are talking to him.
"Let's go."
The words mean nothing to Blaine. All he can focus on is the ache in his stomach, the pounding in his chest, the way he can't stop shaking. When he doesn't respond, the two men hoist him up by his elbows.
"Kid smells like shit and vomit," one of the men grunts.
"Let's shower him before transport," the other man says.
A cramp jolts through Blaine's abdomen, and he whimpers.
"Good idea. Can you walk, son?"
They drag him between them like his feet aren't even touching the floor. They enter a small room, strip him down, and shove him under a spray of lukewarm water.
"Soap, kid," one of the men says. "Use it."
But all Blaine knows is that his skin stops crawling and the shivers don't feel strong enough to shatter bones. The water runs as he doubles over with the pain of another cramp.
Eventually, they pull him out, dry him off, and shove him into dry clothes.
Not his clothes.
His stomach twists, and the clothes aren't clean for very long.
There are handcuffs on his wrists and vomit on his skin and he can't feel worse but he does. His heart is going to explode and he's dizzy and hot and cold and everything hurts and he's terrified and he can't breathe.
He hears someone screaming.
It might be him.
Everything goes black.
"Mr. Anderson?" a voice calls. "Blaine, open your eyes."
He does, and a bright light crosses his field of vision.
"Pupils are still sluggish," the voice says. "Mr. Anderson, do you know where you are?"
He's in a bed. His hands and feet are strapped down. There are tubes everywhere. The voice is a doctor. Next to the doctor is a nurse.
"I don't think we're going to get much response out of him," the doctor says. "Call me if anything changes."
The doctor leaves. The nurse approaches Blaine's bed. She adjusts the blanket covering his legs. She wipes his runny nose with a tissue. "How are you feeling?" she asks.
Not good. But not the worst.
"How'd you get yourself in such bad shape, huh?"
She gently pushes one of his curls off his forehead. He trembles when the action reminds him of Kurt.
It hurts so much.
Chapter 3 - Chapter 5