(no subject)
This evening was quite eventful - a bit of shopping, a few small gifts for friends, and one gift that resulted in a nice smile and hug. Sometimes that's all you need to change the mood of a moment.
I'm not much of a shopper. I think shopping is an artform, but not one that I'm particularly good at. I grew up with people who looked at shopping as a chore or nessecity - never much something that was enjoyable to do, other than as an excuse to leave the house. I took this mentality with me to adulthood, though it's something I've struggled to stave off. My wife loves to shop, for anything, really. It doesn't seem to be an addiction to her like I had first belived, but more of an affirmation of sorts. There's a visable change from entering the store and leaveing, regardless of what we bought (if anything) and how much things cost. I think it's likely that she enjoys doing things with me (as she's enver as happy to go with anyone else). If I look at it from that angle, it's a bit easier to swallow. I love her dearly, though my old habits die hard, and I'm afraid many times have been dimmed by my attitude to the shopping affair.
I've always had a habit to mentally exchanging currency for time. One hour of work is roughly worth $13 at my current job, so purchasing a video game becomes more of an emotional battle for me - was this game worth 3 or more hours of my life in earnings? I'm sure it's a terrible habit, and something that I don't tend to measure in enjoyment terms (as in how many hours in return enjoyment I'd get from such a game). I suppose every system could use a little adjustment now and then.
This evenings shopping was fun, despite the cold and crowding. The car seemed to run better (giving rise to a suspicious temp sensor issue) in the cold air. The drive was nice as well, with no real struggle and a smooth cruise home.
Alex's birthday went well. As soon as I got home he blew out his candles, opened gifts from his mother and I, and we propmtly headed out to his resturant of choice (Wendies). After that the shopping began - he was his usual self; a little annoying, though ultimately well behaved and tolerant to the hustle and bustle of a crowded store. He's 7 years old now and has been in my life for around 4 years (having not seen his father in a year longer than that or so). I'm the closest daily equivilent of a father, though I find myself looking to him as a little brother at times, trying to not replace his father, but be more of a mentor. It has it's drawbacks such as small quarrels and the like, but all in all the relationship works well for the both of us. I can play with him easily, and he looks up to me as a hero at times. The only difficulty is his mothers intervention on occasion. It's to be expected (after all, she wanted a husband and son, not 2 sons) and I take it all in stride. I suppose we all have our ways of dealing with where we are in life.
I knew what I wanted 3 or so years ago. I was lonely, and willing to do anything to have someone look spend time with and count on as a partner and lover. I got what I was looking for at a price higher than I had expected at the time (being quite uneducated in what it takes to support a family) but my tastes and exspectations changed over the years to something more tolerable and easier to adjust too for everyone. Now I enjoy the luxury of a stable family in a warm home with all the benefits of marrage, plus the occasional bonus suprise. Rennoda is a tolerant sort (more so that most are aware or give her creadit for, as she only truly opens up to a handful of people). My delicate oddities and habits are accepted and in some cases welcomed by her in ways no other woman has ever shown me. A few have come close, but none this close - the leap I took to claim her as a wife was a large one, but I don't regret it.
I suppose it could be said I've grown over the years. Seeing a child age before your eyes, and a wife deal with the natural turmoils of being a woman tends to change your point of view on many things. For now, I am happy where I am, and who I am with. There are a few puzzle pieces missing in my life, but Rennoda's support and the wisdom of my friends has always kept me in line. I can't wait to see what the holidays and next year have in store for all of us.
Time to crawl into bed and enjoy a few laughs before another night of cold sleep (the best kind with nice blankets!)...
I'm not much of a shopper. I think shopping is an artform, but not one that I'm particularly good at. I grew up with people who looked at shopping as a chore or nessecity - never much something that was enjoyable to do, other than as an excuse to leave the house. I took this mentality with me to adulthood, though it's something I've struggled to stave off. My wife loves to shop, for anything, really. It doesn't seem to be an addiction to her like I had first belived, but more of an affirmation of sorts. There's a visable change from entering the store and leaveing, regardless of what we bought (if anything) and how much things cost. I think it's likely that she enjoys doing things with me (as she's enver as happy to go with anyone else). If I look at it from that angle, it's a bit easier to swallow. I love her dearly, though my old habits die hard, and I'm afraid many times have been dimmed by my attitude to the shopping affair.
I've always had a habit to mentally exchanging currency for time. One hour of work is roughly worth $13 at my current job, so purchasing a video game becomes more of an emotional battle for me - was this game worth 3 or more hours of my life in earnings? I'm sure it's a terrible habit, and something that I don't tend to measure in enjoyment terms (as in how many hours in return enjoyment I'd get from such a game). I suppose every system could use a little adjustment now and then.
This evenings shopping was fun, despite the cold and crowding. The car seemed to run better (giving rise to a suspicious temp sensor issue) in the cold air. The drive was nice as well, with no real struggle and a smooth cruise home.
Alex's birthday went well. As soon as I got home he blew out his candles, opened gifts from his mother and I, and we propmtly headed out to his resturant of choice (Wendies). After that the shopping began - he was his usual self; a little annoying, though ultimately well behaved and tolerant to the hustle and bustle of a crowded store. He's 7 years old now and has been in my life for around 4 years (having not seen his father in a year longer than that or so). I'm the closest daily equivilent of a father, though I find myself looking to him as a little brother at times, trying to not replace his father, but be more of a mentor. It has it's drawbacks such as small quarrels and the like, but all in all the relationship works well for the both of us. I can play with him easily, and he looks up to me as a hero at times. The only difficulty is his mothers intervention on occasion. It's to be expected (after all, she wanted a husband and son, not 2 sons) and I take it all in stride. I suppose we all have our ways of dealing with where we are in life.
I knew what I wanted 3 or so years ago. I was lonely, and willing to do anything to have someone look spend time with and count on as a partner and lover. I got what I was looking for at a price higher than I had expected at the time (being quite uneducated in what it takes to support a family) but my tastes and exspectations changed over the years to something more tolerable and easier to adjust too for everyone. Now I enjoy the luxury of a stable family in a warm home with all the benefits of marrage, plus the occasional bonus suprise. Rennoda is a tolerant sort (more so that most are aware or give her creadit for, as she only truly opens up to a handful of people). My delicate oddities and habits are accepted and in some cases welcomed by her in ways no other woman has ever shown me. A few have come close, but none this close - the leap I took to claim her as a wife was a large one, but I don't regret it.
I suppose it could be said I've grown over the years. Seeing a child age before your eyes, and a wife deal with the natural turmoils of being a woman tends to change your point of view on many things. For now, I am happy where I am, and who I am with. There are a few puzzle pieces missing in my life, but Rennoda's support and the wisdom of my friends has always kept me in line. I can't wait to see what the holidays and next year have in store for all of us.
Time to crawl into bed and enjoy a few laughs before another night of cold sleep (the best kind with nice blankets!)...