Somewhere I Have Never Travelled, Gladly Beyond - Chapter 8
As I write, I always have a terrible fear that someday a real-life version of the fictional character Tom Lynn will appear and leave me his classic comment:
Sentimental Drivel.
With that said...
Title: Somewhere I Have Never Travelled, Gladly Beyond
Fandom: Naruto
Type: Multi-chaptered
Rating: Pg-13
Pairings: Deidara/Sakura
Word count: 3,291
Summary: Naruto had been bragging all day that his new jutsu was his best yet. Sakura and her new situation beg to differ. Post time-skip. DeiSaku.
A/N: Long overdue.
Sakura was awoken by the bed shifting and a sudden lack of warmth beside her. Tugging the quilt closer around her shoulders and blinking the sleep from her eyes, she saw Deidara pull on his sweater and sandals before making his way towards the door.
As he reabsorbed back into his hands the small bits of clay outlining the doorway, Sakura cleared her throat and asked, “Where are you going?”
He glanced back at her over his shoulder, hardly interrupting his work of clearing the explosives. “To steal us some food.”
Frowning, she was torn between disappointment and relief, but not at all surprise, that his voice took on its usual tone with her. He gave no indication that anything had passed between them the night before. Ignoring the conflicting feelings, she asked, “Can’t you just buy it? We’ve got money now.”
Sighing dramatically, he paused in his work and turned towards her, explaining as though it were the simplest thing in the world, “It’s a matter of principal, yeah. Akatsuki don’t pay for things.”
“Girls don’t like guys who are cheap,” she teased in a sing-song voice, although the phrase accidentally ended in a yawn. Glancing quickly under the covers to make sure that she was decent - yes, pants and tons of bandages - she slid out from under the quilt, being careful not to strain her wounds too much. Both her delight that she didn’t pass out while standing up and the unpleasantly cold floor beneath her feet helped her concentrate on drowning out Deidara’s annoyed retorts to her truthful comment.
Sakura picked up the shirt and pants that had been pushed off the end of the bed at some point during the night. Cutting off Deidara’s tirade without even a glance at him, she asked, “Are these clothes are for me?”
“...Yes.” His voice was tense and strained as he fumed at her, and Sakura had to fight back a triumphant smile that she’d totally won the day’s first petty argument. Nonetheless, she thought, slightly disappointed, it might be best to appease him; the day had barely begun, and she had a feeling it was going to be long enough anyways without her being on his bad side. A lack of cooperation between them while being on the run from the local feudal lord couldn’t be expected to end well.
“I think my healing is coming along nicely,” she commented before glancing over at him. “How are you feeling this morning? Do you want me to take a look?” She cringed inwardly at the tone of her voice and hoped the exaggerated amount of sweetness and concern didn’t sound too fake. She knew he was almost perfectly fine; his body would be capable of fighting off any remaining poison left in him by now, especially after a good night of sleep.
“I’m fine, yeah,” he growled out, not meeting her eyes, and Sakura could hear the slight softening in his voice. Success! “You should be more concerned about yourself. You’re still an absolute mess.”
“Thanks,” she replied sarcastically. “I’m getting better, you know. It’s not like I haven’t survived harder fights before.”
Her tone was intended to be light, but it twisted from her control as she thought involuntarily of Sasori and his puppets. Sakura felt her thoughts display on her face, and saw them reflected on Deidara’s. Right, she reminded herself, she shouldn’t think about that. He wasn’t really Akatsuki, or at least not a monster like Itachi, and she hadn’t killed his partner. They had made their uneasy peace, but it needed to be kept.
Eager for a distraction, Sakura poked at her midsection, examining her own injuries. With all of the chakra she’d been pouring into them, they felt like they were healing fairly well. She did, however, have one thing to take care of before she set out for the day. “Do we have more bandages?” She had to lean over slightly to see her wrappings clearly. The movement made her wince, and she noticed that there were several patches of red showing through the strips of cloth. “These ones are all bloody, I need to change them.”
Nodding and grateful for the change of subject, Deidara walked over to a desk across the room. Sakura noticed that the small amount of supplies they had, as well as the backpack full of money, had been thrown haphazardly across it. Sorting through the mess, he grabbed some rolls of white bandages.
“I’m not much of a medic,” he explained as he handed her some of the dressings, “But this was the best I could find on short notice.”
‘Short notice’ was a bit of an understatement, Sakura thought wryly as she untangled the first roll. With a teammate down and a castle of enemies swarming after you, it was impressive that he’d managed all that he had. A sudden wave of gratefulness hit her for all that he’d done, and she felt a little guilty for needling him earlier about being cheap.
Pointedly ignoring that thought to save her pride, Sakura concentrated on her wounds. Finding one end of the stained bandages around her torso, she started to unwind them carefully before something occurred to her. Looking up at Deidara who was helping untangle the fresh strips of cloth, she asked, “Err, could you turn around for a minute?”
He glanced up at her and blinked, uncomprehending. Gesturing towards her top half and the bandages she was unwinding, she didn’t know quite what else to say. Deidara’s eyes followed the direction of Sakura’s hands, his gaze landing unconsciously on a part of her anatomy that would, in any other situation, have merited a slap. It took a moment before he seemed to clue in. Blushing a furious shade of red, he tossed the rest of the clean bandages on the bed and turned back towards the door, continuing to clear the explosive clay.
“Not like it’s nothing I haven’t seen already, yeah,” he mumbled, embarrassed and failing miserably to hide it. Sakura could see that even the tips of his ears had turned red. As his comment settled in, she felt herself matching his blush and busied herself in changing her dressings while pretending not to have heard. She tried in vain to convince herself that he might have been the one to bandage her up in the first place, but it’s different during a medical emergency.
When she’d finished rebinding her wounds, Sakura slipped on the nondescript black shirt and pants that had been laid out for her and was surprised to find that they fit fairly well. She raised an eyebrow at Deidara’s back as he pretended to still be busy with the traps around the door. Whether it was luck or something else that had allowed him to find her properly sized clothes, it was certainly a welcome change from Naruto, who had never fully grasped the concept that giving her clothes twice her size wasn’t flattering.
While trying in vain to smooth away the wrinkles in her shirt, Sakura said, “I’m all done bandaging myself up. We can head out whenever.”
Deidara turned to face her, the remnants of his earlier blush still not entirely faded. “We?”
Sakura faltered; she hadn’t been expecting any opposition. “W-Well, of course I’m coming with you. I’m not just going to sit around here and --”
Shaking his head, Deidara interrupted her, “No way. I might not know much about healing and that sort of thing, but you need to rest, yeah. I’m not dragging you around town if there’s a risk you might reopen your injuries. Stay here, I’ll be back in fifteen. Get some more rest for now, and we’ll leave for another town once we’ve had something to eat.”
It was hard to suppress the smile that crept onto her face when she heard the concern in his voice. Harder still, was pushing away the sudden, silly thoughts that he was almost being sweet. Her heart beat a little too hard in her chest as she replied, “You don’t have to worry about me.”
Disgusted with the unintentional amount of tenderness in her voice, Sakura almost missed Deidara’s immediate reply of: “I’m not worried about you!” Frowning, he added quickly, “It’ll be safer if it’s just me, yeah. The whole city’s looking for us; it’ll be easier to blend one stranger into a crowded street than two. Besides, they’re looking for two people, not one. If I go alone, it’s less suspicious.”
“For all we know, they could think I’m dead,” she argued, as the thought of being left alone became increasingly unappealing, “It’s no less safe in that respect if you go alone.”
“Still, do you want to take that chance, yeah?” Deidara raked a hand through his blond hair before continuing, “Look, if it makes you feel any better, I’ll seal this place up with explosives like last night. You’ll be fine.”
Sakura knew that it all made perfect sense for her to stay behind, but she didn’t want to be alone in the apartment, waiting for either Deidara to come back or for enemy ninja to find her. It wasn’t that she felt safer with him, she thought as Inner Sakura laughed at her for being so pathetic; it was simply that she was in a strange place and he was the only person she knew. As difficult as it was to admit, being with him was comforting. “If they find me here, those explosives will only keep them out for so long. I can fight, but not at my usual level. Let me come with you; we’ll bring everything with us, and as soon as we get some food, we can leave. We won’t need to take the chance of coming back to this place.”
Considering this for a moment, Deidara made up his mind but didn’t look pleased. “Alright. Let’s get all our stuff together and head out. We’ve wasted enough time arguing already, yeah.”
Afraid that the wave of relief that hit her would be visible on her face, Sakura bent down gingerly, taking care not to strain her injuries, to fasten her sandals. Deidara watched her from the corner of his eye as he moved to repack their supplies.
Slipping on the heavy backpack and refusing Sakura’s suggestion that she take some of their things, Deidara opened the door cautiously and looked down into the hall. Sakura closed the apartment door lightly behind her and followed Deidara down the emergency stairs that led outside. As they stepped into the cold morning air, she almost regretted not having stayed behind with the warm quilt on the bed to curl up in. The frost on the ground bit at her toes, and her breath left little clouds in the air. Wriggling her toes to keep the blood flowing, she decided that her first purchase after they’d had breakfast would be a proper pair of shoes.
The streets were packed with people examining shop fronts and market stalls. Afraid that they would be separated, Sakura looped an arm around one of Deidara’s and held on tight. Glancing up at him, she saw that his face betrayed no signs of uneasiness. He looked like any other early morning shopper going out to the market. As she was pressed up against him in the crowded streets, however, she felt him tense and alert.
A few times, passersby bumped too strongly into her, sending shocks up through her injuries. She hissed in pain but did nothing; using chakra to heal herself out in the open could be detected by nearby ninja. Realizing what was happening, Deidara removed his arm from Sakura’s grasp and placed it instead around her shoulders, drawing her closer. Sakura tensed at the contact, but forced herself to relax. It was the sort of position that Ino would have giggled over, but it kept them together as they navigated the city. Not to mention, Sakura thought guiltily as she huddled against him, he was nice and warm.
Weaving their way through the crowd, Deidara gradually wandered towards the shops at one side. If she hadn’t been watching him so carefully, she never would have seen him pocket some little round fruits that were placed conveniently at the edge of a stand. Sakura grimaced; she’d forgotten to remind him not to do that. Sending mental apologies to the vendor, Sakura nonetheless gratefully accepted the stolen food that Deidara pressed into her hand.
Deidara continued this through a busy square, as Sakura felt increasingly guilty. It wasn’t as though she had never stolen before, but since they had money now, she’d much prefer being honest and paying. As they turned onto a side street, Sakura elbowed Deidara lightly in the ribs, grabbing his attention. She didn’t dare tell him off for stealing in such a crowded place where they could be overheard, but she gave him a frown that she hoped would communicate her thoughts. In response, Deidara held her gaze, smirked, and bit into an apple with exaggerated enjoyment.
Sighing, she couldn’t help but remark, “Sometimes you can be so --”
The rest of her comment was cut off as Deidara’s hand clapped over her mouth and he dragged her into a nearby alley, pressing them both against the wall. She clamped down on her initial reaction to struggle and escape; by now she trusted him enough to know that he wouldn’t do this without a good reason. Wishing that her heart would stop pounding so hard in her ears, she masked her chakra and concentrated.
“Ninja,” Deidara whispered into her ear, just as Sakura picked up on the faint signs of nearby chakra.
He kept them tight against the wall, his hand still covering her mouth. Sakura fumed silently over this; she was perfectly capable of keeping her mouth shut on her own. The thought of the mouths in his hands made her want to squirm, but the harder she tried not to think of them, the more she did. Mouths mouths mouths, chanted her inner voice as Sakura came to a new realization and, cursing her fair complexion, felt yet another blush creep into her cheeks.
When the source of chakra had faded into the distance, Deidara loosened his hold on her. Before he could say anything, she wrenched herself away from his grasp and rounded on him, embarrassed and infuriated.
“Stop doing that!” she hissed.
Startled by her outburst and completely unaware of what the problem was, Deidara stared wide-eyed at his travel partner; if anything, she should be happy they’d just avoided a fight. “Stop doing what?”
“What you just did! Putting your hand over my mouth! I can be quiet on my own, you know! And you shouldn’t do it because…” Sakura’s face was now well past the shade of her hair, and her next words came out rushed and mumbled, “Because it’s... likeaweirdsortofkiss AND THAT’S REALLY GROSS!”
As the meaning of her garbled phrase became clear, Deidara’s usual infuriating smirk appeared on his face and he raised an eyebrow at her. Suddenly, Sakura found that she couldn’t meet his eyes. Stupid girl, she yelled to herself, you’re only making things worse! Better to have let it be and saved yourself the embarrassm --
Her thoughts were cut off abruptly as Deidara snaked an arm around her waist, pulling her close. Caught off guard, the first thing that came to mind was that he seemed so much taller than usual when she was held like this. Before she could form the words to ask what he was doing, he placed a hand under her chin, drawing her face up towards his, and kissed her.
As Inner Sakura was mercifully stunned into silence, a thousand thoughts flew through her head. As far as kisses went, it was surprisingly chaste and not at all unpleasant; but it was still wrong. It was wrong because you didn’t kiss a former enemy in a dark back alley, surrounded by grimy brick walls and a few piles of rubbish, even if the snow had started to fall prettily around them. It was wrong because it was Deidara, with his girly blond hair and his maddening smirk, and half the time she wanted to strangle him. It was wrong because he was the only person she knew this far out in nowhere, and she couldn’t deal with the unwanted thoughts and difficult emotions that the kiss was sending her.
As Sakura was still too shocked to move, Deidara broke the kiss and moved back, placing a hand on her shoulder to keep her steady. “There,” he said, as everything from the way he stood to the way he grinned seemed to be laughing at her, “We won’t have to worry about that problem anymore, yeah.”
For the second time that week, Sakura’s fist connected with his jaw.
She watched him stumble back, a hand going up to clutch the side of his face. As he swore masterfully, Sakura wanted to scream, cry, and hit him again. It had been by no means her first kiss, but all the same, she wasn’t the sort of girl who took them lightly. Kisses were supposed to be with boyfriends you really cared about, dates that were going surprisingly well, or sometimes with that guy at the bar who looked progressively better as the night went on and the next morning you could blame it on the alcohol. It wasn’t right to kiss someone just to tease them for saying something silly.
Worst of all, she admitted, she was afraid that this would change something. The dynamics between them weren’t perfect, but they worked. She knew they both recognized the balance they’d settled into: they argued and fought, they had small moments of comfort and being human that they needed to get through this mess, and then they argued and fought some more. Sakura didn’t think too much about him being Akatsuki, and he didn’t bring up her having killed his former partner. He hadn’t seen anything when he’d bandaged her up, and she didn’t like the warm blue of his eyes. She didn’t want anything to change between them; she couldn’t handle anything else.
With one hand still against his face, Deidara ground out through his teeth, “Can’t you just slap like normal women, yeah?”
The tone of his voice and the way he glared at her were all so familiar that Sakura’s thoughts vanished instantly; there was nothing different with Deidara. She held his gaze, suspecting that he understood what had truly upset her.
He was the first to look away. “Ow,” he complained and poked lightly at the side of his face that had taken the blow. Sakura hesitated, still bothered by what had happened, but grinned slowly at the sight of the already-forming bruise.
“I won’t heal you if you’re going to be such a pussy about it.” Her voice was miraculously light and steady. “Come on, we’ve got to get out of this city before they find us.”
What was done was done, Sakura sighed to herself as they slipped back among the people in the main streets. Unsure if she should hold onto his arm as she had done previously, she kept her distance from him.
Only a few steps into the crowd, he grabbed her wrist, tugging her close beside him. “What are you doing, yeah? We’re going to get separated if you aren’t careful.”
Sakura smiled, reassured. Surely, if they could pretend that they didn’t have a million reasons to kill each other, they could pretend that one little kiss couldn’t change anything. There was nothing more she could do than see where this led.
++
Chapter 9
Sentimental Drivel.
With that said...
Title: Somewhere I Have Never Travelled, Gladly Beyond
Fandom: Naruto
Type: Multi-chaptered
Rating: Pg-13
Pairings: Deidara/Sakura
Word count: 3,291
Summary: Naruto had been bragging all day that his new jutsu was his best yet. Sakura and her new situation beg to differ. Post time-skip. DeiSaku.
A/N: Long overdue.
Sakura was awoken by the bed shifting and a sudden lack of warmth beside her. Tugging the quilt closer around her shoulders and blinking the sleep from her eyes, she saw Deidara pull on his sweater and sandals before making his way towards the door.
As he reabsorbed back into his hands the small bits of clay outlining the doorway, Sakura cleared her throat and asked, “Where are you going?”
He glanced back at her over his shoulder, hardly interrupting his work of clearing the explosives. “To steal us some food.”
Frowning, she was torn between disappointment and relief, but not at all surprise, that his voice took on its usual tone with her. He gave no indication that anything had passed between them the night before. Ignoring the conflicting feelings, she asked, “Can’t you just buy it? We’ve got money now.”
Sighing dramatically, he paused in his work and turned towards her, explaining as though it were the simplest thing in the world, “It’s a matter of principal, yeah. Akatsuki don’t pay for things.”
“Girls don’t like guys who are cheap,” she teased in a sing-song voice, although the phrase accidentally ended in a yawn. Glancing quickly under the covers to make sure that she was decent - yes, pants and tons of bandages - she slid out from under the quilt, being careful not to strain her wounds too much. Both her delight that she didn’t pass out while standing up and the unpleasantly cold floor beneath her feet helped her concentrate on drowning out Deidara’s annoyed retorts to her truthful comment.
Sakura picked up the shirt and pants that had been pushed off the end of the bed at some point during the night. Cutting off Deidara’s tirade without even a glance at him, she asked, “Are these clothes are for me?”
“...Yes.” His voice was tense and strained as he fumed at her, and Sakura had to fight back a triumphant smile that she’d totally won the day’s first petty argument. Nonetheless, she thought, slightly disappointed, it might be best to appease him; the day had barely begun, and she had a feeling it was going to be long enough anyways without her being on his bad side. A lack of cooperation between them while being on the run from the local feudal lord couldn’t be expected to end well.
“I think my healing is coming along nicely,” she commented before glancing over at him. “How are you feeling this morning? Do you want me to take a look?” She cringed inwardly at the tone of her voice and hoped the exaggerated amount of sweetness and concern didn’t sound too fake. She knew he was almost perfectly fine; his body would be capable of fighting off any remaining poison left in him by now, especially after a good night of sleep.
“I’m fine, yeah,” he growled out, not meeting her eyes, and Sakura could hear the slight softening in his voice. Success! “You should be more concerned about yourself. You’re still an absolute mess.”
“Thanks,” she replied sarcastically. “I’m getting better, you know. It’s not like I haven’t survived harder fights before.”
Her tone was intended to be light, but it twisted from her control as she thought involuntarily of Sasori and his puppets. Sakura felt her thoughts display on her face, and saw them reflected on Deidara’s. Right, she reminded herself, she shouldn’t think about that. He wasn’t really Akatsuki, or at least not a monster like Itachi, and she hadn’t killed his partner. They had made their uneasy peace, but it needed to be kept.
Eager for a distraction, Sakura poked at her midsection, examining her own injuries. With all of the chakra she’d been pouring into them, they felt like they were healing fairly well. She did, however, have one thing to take care of before she set out for the day. “Do we have more bandages?” She had to lean over slightly to see her wrappings clearly. The movement made her wince, and she noticed that there were several patches of red showing through the strips of cloth. “These ones are all bloody, I need to change them.”
Nodding and grateful for the change of subject, Deidara walked over to a desk across the room. Sakura noticed that the small amount of supplies they had, as well as the backpack full of money, had been thrown haphazardly across it. Sorting through the mess, he grabbed some rolls of white bandages.
“I’m not much of a medic,” he explained as he handed her some of the dressings, “But this was the best I could find on short notice.”
‘Short notice’ was a bit of an understatement, Sakura thought wryly as she untangled the first roll. With a teammate down and a castle of enemies swarming after you, it was impressive that he’d managed all that he had. A sudden wave of gratefulness hit her for all that he’d done, and she felt a little guilty for needling him earlier about being cheap.
Pointedly ignoring that thought to save her pride, Sakura concentrated on her wounds. Finding one end of the stained bandages around her torso, she started to unwind them carefully before something occurred to her. Looking up at Deidara who was helping untangle the fresh strips of cloth, she asked, “Err, could you turn around for a minute?”
He glanced up at her and blinked, uncomprehending. Gesturing towards her top half and the bandages she was unwinding, she didn’t know quite what else to say. Deidara’s eyes followed the direction of Sakura’s hands, his gaze landing unconsciously on a part of her anatomy that would, in any other situation, have merited a slap. It took a moment before he seemed to clue in. Blushing a furious shade of red, he tossed the rest of the clean bandages on the bed and turned back towards the door, continuing to clear the explosive clay.
“Not like it’s nothing I haven’t seen already, yeah,” he mumbled, embarrassed and failing miserably to hide it. Sakura could see that even the tips of his ears had turned red. As his comment settled in, she felt herself matching his blush and busied herself in changing her dressings while pretending not to have heard. She tried in vain to convince herself that he might have been the one to bandage her up in the first place, but it’s different during a medical emergency.
When she’d finished rebinding her wounds, Sakura slipped on the nondescript black shirt and pants that had been laid out for her and was surprised to find that they fit fairly well. She raised an eyebrow at Deidara’s back as he pretended to still be busy with the traps around the door. Whether it was luck or something else that had allowed him to find her properly sized clothes, it was certainly a welcome change from Naruto, who had never fully grasped the concept that giving her clothes twice her size wasn’t flattering.
While trying in vain to smooth away the wrinkles in her shirt, Sakura said, “I’m all done bandaging myself up. We can head out whenever.”
Deidara turned to face her, the remnants of his earlier blush still not entirely faded. “We?”
Sakura faltered; she hadn’t been expecting any opposition. “W-Well, of course I’m coming with you. I’m not just going to sit around here and --”
Shaking his head, Deidara interrupted her, “No way. I might not know much about healing and that sort of thing, but you need to rest, yeah. I’m not dragging you around town if there’s a risk you might reopen your injuries. Stay here, I’ll be back in fifteen. Get some more rest for now, and we’ll leave for another town once we’ve had something to eat.”
It was hard to suppress the smile that crept onto her face when she heard the concern in his voice. Harder still, was pushing away the sudden, silly thoughts that he was almost being sweet. Her heart beat a little too hard in her chest as she replied, “You don’t have to worry about me.”
Disgusted with the unintentional amount of tenderness in her voice, Sakura almost missed Deidara’s immediate reply of: “I’m not worried about you!” Frowning, he added quickly, “It’ll be safer if it’s just me, yeah. The whole city’s looking for us; it’ll be easier to blend one stranger into a crowded street than two. Besides, they’re looking for two people, not one. If I go alone, it’s less suspicious.”
“For all we know, they could think I’m dead,” she argued, as the thought of being left alone became increasingly unappealing, “It’s no less safe in that respect if you go alone.”
“Still, do you want to take that chance, yeah?” Deidara raked a hand through his blond hair before continuing, “Look, if it makes you feel any better, I’ll seal this place up with explosives like last night. You’ll be fine.”
Sakura knew that it all made perfect sense for her to stay behind, but she didn’t want to be alone in the apartment, waiting for either Deidara to come back or for enemy ninja to find her. It wasn’t that she felt safer with him, she thought as Inner Sakura laughed at her for being so pathetic; it was simply that she was in a strange place and he was the only person she knew. As difficult as it was to admit, being with him was comforting. “If they find me here, those explosives will only keep them out for so long. I can fight, but not at my usual level. Let me come with you; we’ll bring everything with us, and as soon as we get some food, we can leave. We won’t need to take the chance of coming back to this place.”
Considering this for a moment, Deidara made up his mind but didn’t look pleased. “Alright. Let’s get all our stuff together and head out. We’ve wasted enough time arguing already, yeah.”
Afraid that the wave of relief that hit her would be visible on her face, Sakura bent down gingerly, taking care not to strain her injuries, to fasten her sandals. Deidara watched her from the corner of his eye as he moved to repack their supplies.
Slipping on the heavy backpack and refusing Sakura’s suggestion that she take some of their things, Deidara opened the door cautiously and looked down into the hall. Sakura closed the apartment door lightly behind her and followed Deidara down the emergency stairs that led outside. As they stepped into the cold morning air, she almost regretted not having stayed behind with the warm quilt on the bed to curl up in. The frost on the ground bit at her toes, and her breath left little clouds in the air. Wriggling her toes to keep the blood flowing, she decided that her first purchase after they’d had breakfast would be a proper pair of shoes.
The streets were packed with people examining shop fronts and market stalls. Afraid that they would be separated, Sakura looped an arm around one of Deidara’s and held on tight. Glancing up at him, she saw that his face betrayed no signs of uneasiness. He looked like any other early morning shopper going out to the market. As she was pressed up against him in the crowded streets, however, she felt him tense and alert.
A few times, passersby bumped too strongly into her, sending shocks up through her injuries. She hissed in pain but did nothing; using chakra to heal herself out in the open could be detected by nearby ninja. Realizing what was happening, Deidara removed his arm from Sakura’s grasp and placed it instead around her shoulders, drawing her closer. Sakura tensed at the contact, but forced herself to relax. It was the sort of position that Ino would have giggled over, but it kept them together as they navigated the city. Not to mention, Sakura thought guiltily as she huddled against him, he was nice and warm.
Weaving their way through the crowd, Deidara gradually wandered towards the shops at one side. If she hadn’t been watching him so carefully, she never would have seen him pocket some little round fruits that were placed conveniently at the edge of a stand. Sakura grimaced; she’d forgotten to remind him not to do that. Sending mental apologies to the vendor, Sakura nonetheless gratefully accepted the stolen food that Deidara pressed into her hand.
Deidara continued this through a busy square, as Sakura felt increasingly guilty. It wasn’t as though she had never stolen before, but since they had money now, she’d much prefer being honest and paying. As they turned onto a side street, Sakura elbowed Deidara lightly in the ribs, grabbing his attention. She didn’t dare tell him off for stealing in such a crowded place where they could be overheard, but she gave him a frown that she hoped would communicate her thoughts. In response, Deidara held her gaze, smirked, and bit into an apple with exaggerated enjoyment.
Sighing, she couldn’t help but remark, “Sometimes you can be so --”
The rest of her comment was cut off as Deidara’s hand clapped over her mouth and he dragged her into a nearby alley, pressing them both against the wall. She clamped down on her initial reaction to struggle and escape; by now she trusted him enough to know that he wouldn’t do this without a good reason. Wishing that her heart would stop pounding so hard in her ears, she masked her chakra and concentrated.
“Ninja,” Deidara whispered into her ear, just as Sakura picked up on the faint signs of nearby chakra.
He kept them tight against the wall, his hand still covering her mouth. Sakura fumed silently over this; she was perfectly capable of keeping her mouth shut on her own. The thought of the mouths in his hands made her want to squirm, but the harder she tried not to think of them, the more she did. Mouths mouths mouths, chanted her inner voice as Sakura came to a new realization and, cursing her fair complexion, felt yet another blush creep into her cheeks.
When the source of chakra had faded into the distance, Deidara loosened his hold on her. Before he could say anything, she wrenched herself away from his grasp and rounded on him, embarrassed and infuriated.
“Stop doing that!” she hissed.
Startled by her outburst and completely unaware of what the problem was, Deidara stared wide-eyed at his travel partner; if anything, she should be happy they’d just avoided a fight. “Stop doing what?”
“What you just did! Putting your hand over my mouth! I can be quiet on my own, you know! And you shouldn’t do it because…” Sakura’s face was now well past the shade of her hair, and her next words came out rushed and mumbled, “Because it’s... likeaweirdsortofkiss AND THAT’S REALLY GROSS!”
As the meaning of her garbled phrase became clear, Deidara’s usual infuriating smirk appeared on his face and he raised an eyebrow at her. Suddenly, Sakura found that she couldn’t meet his eyes. Stupid girl, she yelled to herself, you’re only making things worse! Better to have let it be and saved yourself the embarrassm --
Her thoughts were cut off abruptly as Deidara snaked an arm around her waist, pulling her close. Caught off guard, the first thing that came to mind was that he seemed so much taller than usual when she was held like this. Before she could form the words to ask what he was doing, he placed a hand under her chin, drawing her face up towards his, and kissed her.
As Inner Sakura was mercifully stunned into silence, a thousand thoughts flew through her head. As far as kisses went, it was surprisingly chaste and not at all unpleasant; but it was still wrong. It was wrong because you didn’t kiss a former enemy in a dark back alley, surrounded by grimy brick walls and a few piles of rubbish, even if the snow had started to fall prettily around them. It was wrong because it was Deidara, with his girly blond hair and his maddening smirk, and half the time she wanted to strangle him. It was wrong because he was the only person she knew this far out in nowhere, and she couldn’t deal with the unwanted thoughts and difficult emotions that the kiss was sending her.
As Sakura was still too shocked to move, Deidara broke the kiss and moved back, placing a hand on her shoulder to keep her steady. “There,” he said, as everything from the way he stood to the way he grinned seemed to be laughing at her, “We won’t have to worry about that problem anymore, yeah.”
For the second time that week, Sakura’s fist connected with his jaw.
She watched him stumble back, a hand going up to clutch the side of his face. As he swore masterfully, Sakura wanted to scream, cry, and hit him again. It had been by no means her first kiss, but all the same, she wasn’t the sort of girl who took them lightly. Kisses were supposed to be with boyfriends you really cared about, dates that were going surprisingly well, or sometimes with that guy at the bar who looked progressively better as the night went on and the next morning you could blame it on the alcohol. It wasn’t right to kiss someone just to tease them for saying something silly.
Worst of all, she admitted, she was afraid that this would change something. The dynamics between them weren’t perfect, but they worked. She knew they both recognized the balance they’d settled into: they argued and fought, they had small moments of comfort and being human that they needed to get through this mess, and then they argued and fought some more. Sakura didn’t think too much about him being Akatsuki, and he didn’t bring up her having killed his former partner. He hadn’t seen anything when he’d bandaged her up, and she didn’t like the warm blue of his eyes. She didn’t want anything to change between them; she couldn’t handle anything else.
With one hand still against his face, Deidara ground out through his teeth, “Can’t you just slap like normal women, yeah?”
The tone of his voice and the way he glared at her were all so familiar that Sakura’s thoughts vanished instantly; there was nothing different with Deidara. She held his gaze, suspecting that he understood what had truly upset her.
He was the first to look away. “Ow,” he complained and poked lightly at the side of his face that had taken the blow. Sakura hesitated, still bothered by what had happened, but grinned slowly at the sight of the already-forming bruise.
“I won’t heal you if you’re going to be such a pussy about it.” Her voice was miraculously light and steady. “Come on, we’ve got to get out of this city before they find us.”
What was done was done, Sakura sighed to herself as they slipped back among the people in the main streets. Unsure if she should hold onto his arm as she had done previously, she kept her distance from him.
Only a few steps into the crowd, he grabbed her wrist, tugging her close beside him. “What are you doing, yeah? We’re going to get separated if you aren’t careful.”
Sakura smiled, reassured. Surely, if they could pretend that they didn’t have a million reasons to kill each other, they could pretend that one little kiss couldn’t change anything. There was nothing more she could do than see where this led.
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Chapter 9