Acceptable This Time (Vader/Palpatine) PG-13. Slash.

[wyncatastrophe]

Disclaimer: George Lucas owns Star Wars and does far less creepy things with it. I am not making any profit from posting this work of fanfiction.
Warning: Not a happy fic.
Feedback: Aw, please?

ACCEPTABLE THIS TIME

I roll away from him and wait for my breath to come back, not drawing on the dark side to simply do it for me because sometimes the

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[ansketil_rose]

I roll away from him and wait for my breath to come back, not drawing on the dark side to simply do it for me because sometimes the experience of humanity is a luxury that I can and do allow myself. Even - or perhaps especially - in the Imperial Palace, at the heart of the power I have created.

Beautiful opening paragraph. I love how Palpatine "allows" himself human weaknesses - which he thinks he could totally give up at any time.

I wonder, sometimes, if Vader cares. If he misses the face he'd come to see as friendly, genial, comforting.

You've hit the nail on the head, I think, when you describe Palpatine thinking about himself from other people's eyes. He's an actor and a politician and he thinks about himself that way - from other people's POVs. He enjoys the sensation of an audience.

After all, I doubt that it is strictly for Sidious's sake that he is willing to forego his mask and helmet, vulnerable, letting me breathe for him - letting me use the dark side on him to force air through his battered lungs - for the time it takes to please me.

I have never encountered this idea of Palpatine breathing for Vader. I find it most beautiful - this image.

Ultimately, it seems not to matter, because Vader never asks me for anything. Not even with his eyes - uncovered, now, they are once again a deep, surprising blue. I wonder if he knows that it has been years since his eyes turned the glowing yellow of a Sith?

Is he that apathetic, or does he see himself as not worthy, or does he fear to ask?

A lesser Sith would be grateful, or at least appreciative, of his silent willingness to assume all the risks and take care of himself as best he can, uncomplaining.

That would be a weakness.

And why would he ask THIS for anything, now that he knows the depth of Palpatine's uncaring?

I draw in one more, shuddering breath. The galaxy awaits the exercise of my power; no point in lingering to savor the delights of the flesh.

"The galaxy awaits the excercise of my power" - oh, oh, oh! Palpatine! No one doubts that you have your priorities straight. The idea that such intimacies have just become another task for Vader to complete... *shudders*

[wyncatastrophe]

Wow, thanks for the thoughtful commenting. Yeah, I dunno ... I kind of feel like Sidious is only a token human, that he has been so hollowed by the Dark Side that his humanity, like the personality of Palpatine, is really just a facade, and one that he occasionally revels in. But while Sith should draw on their passions as the source of their power, it seems to me that Sidious has few left. My head!canon, I guess: just the way I read the character. But that to me would explain his interest in how Vader (and others) see him: what good is a facade if there is only yourself to see it?

No, I've never seen the breathing-for-Vader thing elsewhere, either. But it seemed right for the scene: I couldn't imagine him managing all that for himself, but I could imagine him surrendering to it for his master, for the Palpatine he'd loved and lost. Vader clings to that shell of a man he'd respected for a very long time.

I have to go with the Infinities story in which the only thing Vader can hate enough to destroy Maul is himself. When I watch the original trilogy now, I can't help but feeling that Vader serves Sidious in large part because he feels that there is no hope for him - no redemption to be achieved, and certainly no one left to fight for. So serving is the path of least resistance, and finally - perhaps for the first time in his life - he takes that path, and surrenders to the entropy, and does his best to prop up the illusion of functioning justice in the galaxy but it's the only thing that comes close to filling the vacuum left by the loss of a real cause.

Why indeed?

*snurfle* at Palpatine's priorities. Yes, he's rather less than satisfying as a lover.