So Sorry For The Delay... Now Where Was I?

Jun 09, 2004 01:13

SAMI NEWLAN (con’t.):

SAMI:
haha I don't know if I should tell you this
SAMI:
I almost broke up with him over
SAMI:
uhm
SAMI:
You

Hehe… YES!! That’s all I needed. I had taken time to get to know this girl, and she liked me enough to think about me on a deeper level… we talked a little longer, me explaining that if it ever did happen, I’d ask her out in a second… but that I wouldn’t expect her to do it the next day… no… she did it two days later… when talking to her online she told me she’d just broken up with Thad and a few minutes later, I gathered the nerve and asked Sami if she’d like to go out sometime… and she replied, “of course” so it was set… Sami and I were going to go out.
I told my friends the next day, and they were happy for me… it seemed everyone was happy for me. Glad that I had met someone, and curious who the first girl to tie me down was. The few who knew whom I was talking about approved… “yeah, she’s a really awesome girl… knows her music”… “The family guy girl? …Good job!” and etc. and etc. Maxwell was glad that he had gotten to play matchmaker and found me a girl. So all seemed great. I was on top of the world for about 3 days… when Maxwell came online again…
“ayy…. Umm, maybe you shouldn’t rush things with Sami…. I mean she just got out of huge relationship with Thad and she might need some time” ((alright, for any girl reading this… guys don’t think this way… especially when the other day they were overly joyed for the two of us))… Me = “did Sami tell you this?”…. Maxwell = “yeah”….sigh… but, understandable. 8 months is a long time to be with someone, and just suddenly be someone else’s is a real hassle on the brain (though, I never intended her to be mine… I wanted to at least hang out with her before committing to even being able to call her an acquaintance. So the next time Sami and I spoke, I played martyr and said, we don’t have to “go out” right now, I understand if she needs time to recuperate… and she thanked me and that was that… we didn’t talk about dating after that. But by the next weekend she invited me along to go Christmas shopping with her. So I agreed… give us time to get closer. So we went to some head shop (tin robots and obscure action figures and incense) she drove, which was kind of emasculating but I just told myself, “Naw dude… don’t worry… you’ve got ‘shotgun’”… but when we got there, I was intrigued by a lot of the stuff… kind of judging the kind of person Sami was by the fact that she said this was her favorite store… and although obstruct, it was inviting. Simple if you could just kind of shake your head enough so that your brain flips over inside. It was just kind of weird when she’d turn to me and ask, “do you think this would be good for Thad?”… haha… “uh… yeah” ((I’d never met Thad, but I tried to be as helpful as I could when it came to picking out a gift for her x)) But the day went on, and I kept on my best and most friendly behavior… and we smiled and laughed a lot… She dropped me off at home and that was that… but we both left with smiles, and I was happy with the way things had gone.
We talked online and talked about how we both enjoyed eachother’s company, and later in the week she asked if I would want to do something again and I said sure, of course. So we agreed on watching a dvd at my dad’s… so she came over and popped it in. I sat at my side of the couch, watching the tv comfortably, we were watching Mr. Show and I like the show and I know she likes the show, so I was find just watching… As Sami leaned forward to grab a drink off the coffee table, I politely rubbed her back… just to assure her I was there and didn’t completely lose sight of her in the dvd… she smiled and sat back and a little later, snuggled up to me and hugged my arm in hers…… and I have to say… THAT… was honestly one of the top 3 moments I’ve ever experienced in my life… so I just sat by her side and snuggled back, and we spent the remainder of the dvd hand in hand. **I don’t know, snuggling is just the best thing in my mind… I don’t want kissing, I don’t want sex, I don’t want foreplay… I could be happy with snuggling** and Sami was great at it… just made feel secure to be with her… and I just loved her that night… the quickest friend I ever trusted… and so that was us… we went on another date, and then another, and then another… never afraid to snuggle or hold hands… and then on one night, the same as any other… something happened for the worst…. Sigh

Sami came online… “Reid… I have to tell you something if we ever plan on having a romantic relationship” and I sat and gave the okay… and then read words I never thought I’d see typed….
“Victor kissed me tonight”
I can’t remember a time when I just couldn’t move anything… it’s like blood wasn’t flowing anymore… I wasn’t angry… I wasn’t sad… I was just shocked. My friend… my best bud. The one everyone said didn’t care about girls in the slightest… had advanced on a girl I was obviously infatuated with. Suddenly I had about a billion mathematical calculations streaming through my head as I tried to figure out what could have happened… it was like having 30 migranes all at once… and it only stopped 3 minute later when Sami finally typed, “I’m sorry Reid… I just needed to tell you… I’m going to talk to him about it… clear things up”… I asked if it affected her in anyway (because I know doing something like that will make someone look at someone else in a whole new light) and she assured me it didn’t… and so that not to confuse him, she’d talk to him about it… so I felt a little better… so now I had time to sit back and be angry at Victor… I was angry at Victor for all of about 6 seconds before I sighed and couldn’t be angry anymore… He’d known her and been her best friend for 3 years and kissed her… I’d known her 3 months and already wanted to… how could I blame him?… sigh… so I went on… I ignored it, trusting what Sami had told me, and continued on as friends with Victor… All until the big night… my second time on stage, and in front of 700 people… yes… Venice High Battle of the Bands!!

Angus Hits 40 >> Me = vocals / Robert & Maxwell = guitar / Anthony = bass / Jeff = drums… We played three songs… Today by Smashing Pumpkins, Cut Your Ribbon by Sparta and Arcarsonal by At The Drive-In… I sang the last two… Sami came that night, with the rest of the guys… she didn’t usually go to battles but came to support me… well… my first song didn’t go so hot… mostly just mic dancing… but the second one… I dominated the stage… throwing mic stands into the crowd… twirling mics in the air and catching them… and it felt great, like I’d actually done something different than the other bands… and when I finally got off the stage out of breath… My friends all hugged me and congratulated me on a great performance… and then I spotted Sami and Victor sitting next to each other, and I walked over and sat next to victor looking at them both smiling… Victor gave me a huge grin and thanked me for a great performance and I smiled and looked over to Sami… who just looked at me with an expression of blankness… that didn’t fade all that night… and I smiled through it… but inside I sank… she didn’t congratulate me once that night… where had I seen this before… oh yeah!… Just like when I had made that movie for Rachel, Sami didn’t acknowledge that I had done something… that I had almost killed a grandmother with a mic stand with over 700 witnesses watching me the whole time… sigh… why does history love to repeat itself…?

Later that night we all went to Norms to celebrate rocking the stage… Everyone went, even our friend Gabriel… and we all sat at a large table, Sami sitting between Victor and Me, and we all laughed the night away… Though I noticed Sami was more interested in playing around with Victor… I rubbed it off as wanting to show him that they were still friends… and so I ate thinking that… But then we went out to the parking lot, where it was cold, and Sami began hugging Victor snuggly, fitting hands into his pockets… and I didn’t know what to think anymore… I just knew I was embarrassed… and I didn’t want to say anything stupid so I just started walking home… Robert chased after me asking me where I was going, and I told him… and he offered me a ride, but I shook my head… and he understood… and turned my own way and walked home…

((on the way home, I saw a figure of an alien scrawled in chalk on the sidewalk… I spent about 10 minutes talking to it… (I have a picture of it on my phone if you want to see it) and I just vented what I knew to it… and to myself))

So after that night I’d talk to Sami online, asking if she’d want to go out and do something, and she’d argue that she wasn’t really in the mood (woman plumbing problems)… and I was okay with that… and then a week later I asked again… care to take in a movie or something?… and she said she couldn’t… she had cramps… and I don’t know much about the woman cycle, but I don’t think it should last two weeks… and then when I found out that she was doing things with Victor during the weekends, that didn’t bowl over well with logic at all…. So I’d ask her, and she’d tell me that she was just more comfortable with certain people during her cycle than others… so sigh… I took back to my bed… started immuning more… ((though I’d never stopped… I always make sure to balance my friends and love affairs equally… I don’t like things getting in the way or music or love)) But so as the week turned into two…. The two turned into three… and three turned into four… and still… the pre-menstral cycle flooded any chance I had of spending time with Sami… by now everyone was displeased with Sami… saying I should just leave it… Gabriel, my dad… and finally after another night of asking and being shot down, I went to the one person who’s opinion mattered to me…..

“Robert… do you think I should leave Sami?” is the question I asked him… though the real question was, “should I admit to myself that I’ve lost this girl?”… and Robert’s answer was plain and simple….

“YES!!”

That’s pretty much it… the end of our relationship… that night I told Sami I just wanted out of it… though I promised her and myself that I’d maintain the friendship (I don’t know why I do that… but I do… I did it with Rachel, I did it with Lauren, and now with Sami)… I got her a gift for her birthday that I thought she’d like… and I’ve stayed good friends with Sami and Victor (who are now together and very happy (because something Sami hadn’t told me at the time is that when Victor kissed her that night… she kissed him back… so congrates guys)… and now I have two great friends, who I’m sure would do most anything to help me if I needed it… just as I would for them… And don’t resent either of them, I don’t… They’re just better together than Sami and I were… and I’m not going to fight that anymore : ) <>

KELSEY…((???))…:

I’ll admit… I was pretty devastated after Sami… I mean, we were doing great, why didn’t work out?!… It took about two weeks of lonesome laying around to finally recuperate to an extent. And finally, I was in a state of high confidence, and then my father’s girlfriend’s daughter was having her Bat Mitzvah, and I of course had to go.

I dressed up snazzy, cleaned up… and went out without a care in the world. My new philosophy… “who gives a damn?” I was just going to be laid back… I was sick of thinking and feeling.

When I got there, I saw a lot of my family who had surprisingly been invited, and saw a lot of new faces I’d never met before. I wanted to be liked tonight. I wanted to be that guy everyone smiles at, so I was polite and greeting of everyone I met. And then one girl caught my eye, standing alone in the middle of a crowd and just looking around for anything. I approached her and made friendly conversation, and she introduced herself to me as Kelsey. As dinner got underway, I sat at an older kids/ fun adults table, as did Kelsey (though not much conversing took place)… then the music started and I thought, “Who gives a damn?!” and I got up, and danced…. And I freakin’ owned that dance floor!! I painted the lines ((if that makes sense)) and Kelsey and some other girl danced too… we all danced together, sometimes adults joining us… though the dozen of 12 and 13 year old bat mitzvah girl’s friends hardly danced at all. So we danced and danced, and I’ll admit, I was having a good time… And through the course of the night we laughed and had fun… and then good ol’ Mr. DJ slaps down a slow song… and I was already up, Kelsey was sitting alone so I thought, “eh… who gives a damn?” and called her over, and she happily got up and ran out to the dance floor… and hand on hip, we teetered in circles and danced slowly. Every second it seemed we were getting closer to each other ((because we were)) and then soon, we were belly to belly, and her head rest on my shoulder. Now, because I was the only one seriously kicking that dance floor’s can, the DJ took a shining aspiration to me, and for just me, played 2 more slow songs right after (he also told me later that it was for me) and by the middle of the third song, Kelsey cuddling against me as though I’d been her brother for years… and then finally just whispered in my ear, “do you want to get off the dance floor?”
**Now I’m not stupid… I knew what she meant… but did I really want to get off that dance floor?… honestly?… not really. I was quite happy there. But what could I say? “no… not really”?? and besides, “who gives a damn?” and so I said what,

“sure”

So boom… she led me off the dance floor, and away from the party to some little table by the bathroom. We sat down, she closed her eyes, leaned into me… and boom… CONTACT

It was cold. Or at least her tongue was, and I was scared to think that was normal ((I think it’s because we’d only dined on beverages so far)) but it was cold, and we kissed for a couple of minutes before we realized we were still kind of out in the open, so we got up to seek a more sheltering shelter. Now… I would have taken it outside of the banquet hall, but Kelsey feared we wouldn’t be able to get back in… but then she spotted the coat closet. So in we go… making out for a good 3, 5 minutes? And it was a fun experience… But… the thing you don’t expect a coat closet to have, is a little window that looks out over the dance floor…….yeeeeeaaaaaaaahhhh… see, ours had that for some reason ((???)) So it wasn’t long before the mature adult 13 year olds caught sight and felt it there solemn duty, to parade it around and scream it at the highest possible decibel to announce to the banquet hall…

It couldn’t have been more than 2 or 3 seconds before Kelsey’s father came barging into the closet, grinning widely… “hehehe… alright kids… very nice… let’s go”…. So, stepping out of the closet ((shut up anyone who took that as an ‘out of the closet’ joke)), but so stepping out of the closet, all eyes were on us… And so that was my first kiss… Infront her of my parents, in front of her parents, in front of my grandparents and about 30 little boys and girls who just couldn’t get enough of it…. That’s my first kiss.

We exchanged numbers that night ((I guess I felt obligated to give her my number)) and she called the next day… the problem that issued itself after the number exchange was that she lives in Long Beach… arrggg… But we agreed to hang out that weekend, but since she’d already driven out to Santa Monica for the Bat Mitzvah, it was my turn to drive up to LB… so my dad gave me a lift and dropped me off at the front door. And there at the door was that familiar face of her father, looking at me and greeting me welcome. I stepped in, and there was Kelsey… raring to see me… I stayed in the living room and conversed with her parents for a long while, watching as Kelsey got ancy, and finally taking my hand in hers, announced that she was going to give me the tour… and wheeled me down the hall to her room… I stepped in looking around, some posters on the wall… little clippings and what not… and Kelsey closed the door behind us, and I turned around and she….

--To be continued--
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