EPISODE IN REVIEW: TOP SECRET
......
OMg. This was THE gayest episode to date. Subtext out the WAZOOOOO. Srsly. I love eet.
As my friend Joe says, it doesn't even have subtext. It was like: "HERE IZ TEH GAY!"
Fabulous. :D
Soldier!dudez: *singin’* Do a lil’ DANCE, make a lil’ LOVE, get down ta-nite! WHOO!
Dubya teh Bush: Seez? Join teh army. Itz a party every day!
*ASPLOZION*
Soldier!dudez: AAAHHHHH! CHRIST! MY LEG!
Dubya teh Bush: O_O Wut teh hell!? Turn that mew-zeek back on! Iz still fun here.
*MOOZIK and ASPLOZIONS*
Dubya teh Bush: So join teh army, kayz? :D
Soldier!man: *to camera* HERE! Take this gun!
baka_sensei: …I just gotz a semi-automatic. :D I killz Cameron. *BLAM*
Cameron: *Iz ded*
baka_sensei: I love interactive television.
House: *lookz at file* Whoaz. That’s uncanny. Cuddy, quick. Think of a number ‘tween 1 and 10.
Cuddy: …Kayz?
House: Iz it 6?
Cuddy:… Yeahz.
House: zomg. I iz psychic. Kick ass.
Wilson: *in da potty wiff teh pants down* That’s amaaaaazin’!
House: *also wiff teh pants down* I knowz. I mean, he looked just like da guy in mah dream!
Wilson: I wuzn’t talkin’ ‘bout teh dream. *pointed stare*
House: Heee. :D
Wilson: Okayz, so liek, in the Village Ppl, he only wore navy clothes durin’ "In da Navy." Srsly.
House: O_O … holy shit, you’re soopur gay. Like a soopur hero. Soopur Gay Man.
Wilson: … ‘tanks. :D
House: I gotsta pee.
Cameron: WHHHHHHYYYYYYY?
House: Wilson wuz in thar ‘afore. Didn’t have much time to use da facilities, if ya knowz wut I mean. ;D
Cameron: Liek, I don’t give a crap ‘bout our job ‘er anyfing, sooooz, sex, plz?
Chase: uhhhhhhh…..
Cameron: *ATTACKS*
Chase: RAPE! Oh, KRAI-EEST! JEEBUZ, PLZ! *weeps*
Jeebuz: Eewz.
House: *nawt peeing* Why, WHY IZ EET SO HARD! *wall!fist*
baka_sensei: That wuz pretty melo-dramatic.
Soldier!man: I GOTZ TEH VAGINA TONGUE!
Foreman: Eewz.
Chase: *out ‘o breath* Wutz goin’ on?
Foreman: He’z got teh vagina!tongue…. Holy shit. Cameron, are you NOT wearing a BRA?
Cameron: Uhhhhh….
Foreman: Oh, Christ…*iz sick*
Cameron: HEYZ! MY TA-TAS ARE BEAUTIMOUS!
Foreman: *iz sick on Cameron’s shoez*
Cameron: Eewz.
House: *in tub wiff teh army mag*
Wilson: Hey, House, did you remember teh… O__O
House: This isn’t what it looks like.
Wilson: You coulda TOL’ me you had an army kink. I got that Village Ppl outfit…
House: Fan-boy.
Wilson: Yes, plz.
House: He stuck his tongue in one too many va-jay-jayz dat wuz nasty.
Chase: Hez nawt the only one. :D
House: Eewz. That shit iz nuffin to be proud of.
Foreman: *giggle* House will do WILSON before you do Chase.
Cameron: … zomg.
Foreman: Wut?
Cameron: By that reasoning, House and Wilson have been having sex for months. O_O
Wilson: 3 years, 5 months, 2 weeks, 6 days, 7 hours and 21 minutes to be precise. :D
House: *head!desk* You keep track of that? You are such a girl.
Foreman: *iz sick on Cameron’s shoez. Cuz it was awesome the first time, and it needed to happen again*
Cameron: Wanna grab lunch and a blow job?
Chase: Wut the hell is WRONG with you?
House: SHADDUP! Jeezus.
Cameron: *iz pwned* But I lovez yoo.
Chase: CHEATING BITCH! *tear*
House: Been in any pornos?
Soldier!guy: There wuz this one, buuuuut, y’know, DADT says I can’t talk about eet. :D
Wilson: Oh, yeah. I ‘member that one. Good times. Gooooood times.
House: *wiff catheter* GRAAAAGGGGHHHHH!
baka_sensei: HOLY SHIT! *coverz eyes* Is it over?!? FUCK! That totally gotsta suck.
House: *iz ded*
House: *peein’ on the floor* Wow. I think we just took this pee!thing waaaaay too far. Srsly. Wtf.
Cuddy: Thank God itz a dream sequence.
House: What IZ it with dream sequences this episode?
Chase: I wish I knew… Wut iz it wiff me alwayz getting gross shit all over me? I mean, I thought the ‘asploded testicle wuz bad enough…
House: That was a dream too.
Chase: You LIKE getting me all dirty, don’t you!?
House: ….. :D
Wilson: Aaah, I love our daily rendezvous in teh baffroom. *whistles*
House: Wut teh fakk is up wiff us and baffroom scenes??
Cuddy: Stop starin’ at mah ass and mah boobs and thinkin’ bout me in the shower, you perv. *flounces off*
House: Y’know, you really shouldn’t do that if you want to discourage me. ;-*
Cuddy: Eewz.
Chase and Cameron: *MAKEOUTMAKEOUTMAKEOUT*
House: Whoopz! Sorry, gotsta throw this out. Oh, and if yoo use mine and Wilson’s stash of lube, Imma kill a bitch. Itz bad enough that you’re usin’ our closet, you hors.
Chase and Cameron: O_O O_O
House: I’m so awesome.
OMg. This was THE gayest episode to date. Subtext out the WAZOOOOO. Srsly. I love eet.
As my friend Joe says, it doesn't even have subtext. It was like: "HERE IZ TEH GAY!"
Fabulous. :D
Soldier!dudez: *singin’* Do a lil’ DANCE, make a lil’ LOVE, get down ta-nite! WHOO!
Dubya teh Bush: Seez? Join teh army. Itz a party every day!
*ASPLOZION*
Soldier!dudez: AAAHHHHH! CHRIST! MY LEG!
Dubya teh Bush: O_O Wut teh hell!? Turn that mew-zeek back on! Iz still fun here.
*MOOZIK and ASPLOZIONS*
Dubya teh Bush: So join teh army, kayz? :D
Soldier!man: *to camera* HERE! Take this gun!
baka_sensei: …I just gotz a semi-automatic. :D I killz Cameron. *BLAM*
Cameron: *Iz ded*
baka_sensei: I love interactive television.
House: *lookz at file* Whoaz. That’s uncanny. Cuddy, quick. Think of a number ‘tween 1 and 10.
Cuddy: …Kayz?
House: Iz it 6?
Cuddy:… Yeahz.
House: zomg. I iz psychic. Kick ass.
Wilson: *in da potty wiff teh pants down* That’s amaaaaazin’!
House: *also wiff teh pants down* I knowz. I mean, he looked just like da guy in mah dream!
Wilson: I wuzn’t talkin’ ‘bout teh dream. *pointed stare*
House: Heee. :D
Wilson: Okayz, so liek, in the Village Ppl, he only wore navy clothes durin’ "In da Navy." Srsly.
House: O_O … holy shit, you’re soopur gay. Like a soopur hero. Soopur Gay Man.
Wilson: … ‘tanks. :D
House: I gotsta pee.
Cameron: WHHHHHHYYYYYYY?
House: Wilson wuz in thar ‘afore. Didn’t have much time to use da facilities, if ya knowz wut I mean. ;D
Cameron: Liek, I don’t give a crap ‘bout our job ‘er anyfing, sooooz, sex, plz?
Chase: uhhhhhhh…..
Cameron: *ATTACKS*
Chase: RAPE! Oh, KRAI-EEST! JEEBUZ, PLZ! *weeps*
Jeebuz: Eewz.
House: *nawt peeing* Why, WHY IZ EET SO HARD! *wall!fist*
baka_sensei: That wuz pretty melo-dramatic.
Soldier!man: I GOTZ TEH VAGINA TONGUE!
Foreman: Eewz.
Chase: *out ‘o breath* Wutz goin’ on?
Foreman: He’z got teh vagina!tongue…. Holy shit. Cameron, are you NOT wearing a BRA?
Cameron: Uhhhhh….
Foreman: Oh, Christ…*iz sick*
Cameron: HEYZ! MY TA-TAS ARE BEAUTIMOUS!
Foreman: *iz sick on Cameron’s shoez*
Cameron: Eewz.
House: *in tub wiff teh army mag*
Wilson: Hey, House, did you remember teh… O__O
House: This isn’t what it looks like.
Wilson: You coulda TOL’ me you had an army kink. I got that Village Ppl outfit…
House: Fan-boy.
Wilson: Yes, plz.
House: He stuck his tongue in one too many va-jay-jayz dat wuz nasty.
Chase: Hez nawt the only one. :D
House: Eewz. That shit iz nuffin to be proud of.
Foreman: *giggle* House will do WILSON before you do Chase.
Cameron: … zomg.
Foreman: Wut?
Cameron: By that reasoning, House and Wilson have been having sex for months. O_O
Wilson: 3 years, 5 months, 2 weeks, 6 days, 7 hours and 21 minutes to be precise. :D
House: *head!desk* You keep track of that? You are such a girl.
Foreman: *iz sick on Cameron’s shoez. Cuz it was awesome the first time, and it needed to happen again*
Cameron: Wanna grab lunch and a blow job?
Chase: Wut the hell is WRONG with you?
House: SHADDUP! Jeezus.
Cameron: *iz pwned* But I lovez yoo.
Chase: CHEATING BITCH! *tear*
House: Been in any pornos?
Soldier!guy: There wuz this one, buuuuut, y’know, DADT says I can’t talk about eet. :D
Wilson: Oh, yeah. I ‘member that one. Good times. Gooooood times.
House: *wiff catheter* GRAAAAGGGGHHHHH!
baka_sensei: HOLY SHIT! *coverz eyes* Is it over?!? FUCK! That totally gotsta suck.
House: *iz ded*
House: *peein’ on the floor* Wow. I think we just took this pee!thing waaaaay too far. Srsly. Wtf.
Cuddy: Thank God itz a dream sequence.
House: What IZ it with dream sequences this episode?
Chase: I wish I knew… Wut iz it wiff me alwayz getting gross shit all over me? I mean, I thought the ‘asploded testicle wuz bad enough…
House: That was a dream too.
Chase: You LIKE getting me all dirty, don’t you!?
House: ….. :D
Wilson: Aaah, I love our daily rendezvous in teh baffroom. *whistles*
House: Wut teh fakk is up wiff us and baffroom scenes??
Cuddy: Stop starin’ at mah ass and mah boobs and thinkin’ bout me in the shower, you perv. *flounces off*
House: Y’know, you really shouldn’t do that if you want to discourage me. ;-*
Cuddy: Eewz.
Chase and Cameron: *MAKEOUTMAKEOUTMAKEOUT*
House: Whoopz! Sorry, gotsta throw this out. Oh, and if yoo use mine and Wilson’s stash of lube, Imma kill a bitch. Itz bad enough that you’re usin’ our closet, you hors.
Chase and Cameron: O_O O_O
House: I’m so awesome.