On the subject of edibility..
The old egg slogan, "incredible, edible egg" has been dropped in favor of a more eXtreme, shock-value-adding alternative: "the edible abortion."
This move was made after researchers found it was in fact a false statement to call the egg "incredible"; a simple application of the "Hulk theorum of incredibility" shows that eggs featured neither the greenness nor the fear-inducing factors of the Hulk, and so the egg was deemed as simply "subpar in terms of incredulity."
However, the late genius mastermind, known to most only by his super-villain title, "Dr. Seuss," had the foresight to notice this when he created the truly "incredible" egg: the Green Egg, which was found not by itself, but as a pair, and featured a sidekick of ham. This combination of greenness, and the inherent fear that it instilled in those who were offered to "eat it" - even when tempted by a fox, in a box no less - which would cause them to scream in terror and run as the bricked, graffiti-ridden walls of a metropolis fell behind them, held testament to its incredulity.
What of those who claim that an egg is not an abortion, as it was never fertile? To you, I say this: Did I ever bring up the Hulk theorum of incredibility and rain on YOUR parade when eggs were "incredible"? No, I didn't. Now shut up and get in that box with the fox.. and take those green eggs.. we're getting some bestial food-play photos for the front page! Or.. wait.. maybe this is why I was never a journalist..
This move was made after researchers found it was in fact a false statement to call the egg "incredible"; a simple application of the "Hulk theorum of incredibility" shows that eggs featured neither the greenness nor the fear-inducing factors of the Hulk, and so the egg was deemed as simply "subpar in terms of incredulity."
However, the late genius mastermind, known to most only by his super-villain title, "Dr. Seuss," had the foresight to notice this when he created the truly "incredible" egg: the Green Egg, which was found not by itself, but as a pair, and featured a sidekick of ham. This combination of greenness, and the inherent fear that it instilled in those who were offered to "eat it" - even when tempted by a fox, in a box no less - which would cause them to scream in terror and run as the bricked, graffiti-ridden walls of a metropolis fell behind them, held testament to its incredulity.
What of those who claim that an egg is not an abortion, as it was never fertile? To you, I say this: Did I ever bring up the Hulk theorum of incredibility and rain on YOUR parade when eggs were "incredible"? No, I didn't. Now shut up and get in that box with the fox.. and take those green eggs.. we're getting some bestial food-play photos for the front page! Or.. wait.. maybe this is why I was never a journalist..