Something is wrong with my friendships... plus what I would like...
I would like to have at least 3 really good friendships, or something with more meaning, where there is no chance for the other person and myself to be mistaken for either bratty siblings or an old married couple.
I have certainly learned quite a bit since the starting of "the not-so-complete understanding of wschmrdr". I'm a headstrong guy that has mellowed out quite a bit within the past recent years. However, my headstrong-ness is what may be my downfall. I'm quite opinionated, and when you rub two differing opinions together, you may see some fireworks. However, I think that is what turns out to be what I consider to be good friends. I know, it seems stupid. Maybe I just find similar people to be boring. The unknown is interesting, even if there are times when I have no idea what I am doing. However, I'm not sure if there really is anyone I have met in the last 24 years and nearly 8 months of my life that is similar to me. Sadly, there are so many people that build friendships based upon common interest, and it just doesn't suit well with me.
Anyways, I have been thinking long and deep lately, thanks to a suggestion from a LiveJournal friend, as well as the thoughts of a potential girlfriend (we've gone out together a couple of times, but I'm not really good at picking up a vibe as to what she's thinking...), and I've thought quite a bit of what I'm looking for in Mrs. Wschmrdr. I'm not sure if I can come up with a complete list, but here is what I would like, even if I don't know if this is what I truly want:
1. The biggest thing is that I don't want to have a pseudo-telepathic connection with her. One thing I find in my professional relationships is that I try to tune into the other person and ride the same wave to a common goal. Typically, if we work well together, questions wouldn't even have to be asked, as I would know to give the appropriate answers. If I don't know what she's thinking, it'd make for a more fun time.
2. I would like a relationship where both of us are open to each other's interests, even if they aren't the same. Perhaps one night we go for a walk in the woods, whereas another night we go club dancing together. See a film one night, and go to a hockey game on another night. Yes, I realize this means I'd have to come out of my crab shell (the new horoscope is a farce, I am and always will be a stereotypical Cancer) and try something new, but I do hope it's one of those things where I really wouldn't mind trying it, especially with her.
A few other things I'm looking for:
1. Intelligence. She doesn't have to be smarter than me, but I really don't want to marry someone as dumb as rocks.
2. Listening to me. Yes, I know, it usually is the reciprocal. However, I've found that there are some girls that really don't want to get to know me. I've been using an online dating site, and there are a number of girls that contact me, haven't read my entire profile, set stuff up, and once they read the whole thing, decide the answer is no. I will admit, one girl did think a good first date was to get me a haircut. I'm sure many of you knew my answer to that.
3. The right amount of connection. Some people will know I am a touchy-feely person. It sort of comes with the whole growing up in the North Country, where evenings can get really cold, and I'd rather either she were there to keep me warm at night, or more likely, I were there to keep her warm at night. However, I don't want to be smothered. She shouldn't suffocate me (in the literal OR figurative sense), or send me 15 texts a day (unless of course I send 13-16), especially if they're one word and have no meaning. However, I don't want her to ignore me, because then I would feel alone.
I realize this stuff is pretty generic, and I'm not very picky about looks. Some of it may be cryptic, but at least I do understand it for myself.
I have certainly learned quite a bit since the starting of "the not-so-complete understanding of wschmrdr". I'm a headstrong guy that has mellowed out quite a bit within the past recent years. However, my headstrong-ness is what may be my downfall. I'm quite opinionated, and when you rub two differing opinions together, you may see some fireworks. However, I think that is what turns out to be what I consider to be good friends. I know, it seems stupid. Maybe I just find similar people to be boring. The unknown is interesting, even if there are times when I have no idea what I am doing. However, I'm not sure if there really is anyone I have met in the last 24 years and nearly 8 months of my life that is similar to me. Sadly, there are so many people that build friendships based upon common interest, and it just doesn't suit well with me.
Anyways, I have been thinking long and deep lately, thanks to a suggestion from a LiveJournal friend, as well as the thoughts of a potential girlfriend (we've gone out together a couple of times, but I'm not really good at picking up a vibe as to what she's thinking...), and I've thought quite a bit of what I'm looking for in Mrs. Wschmrdr. I'm not sure if I can come up with a complete list, but here is what I would like, even if I don't know if this is what I truly want:
1. The biggest thing is that I don't want to have a pseudo-telepathic connection with her. One thing I find in my professional relationships is that I try to tune into the other person and ride the same wave to a common goal. Typically, if we work well together, questions wouldn't even have to be asked, as I would know to give the appropriate answers. If I don't know what she's thinking, it'd make for a more fun time.
2. I would like a relationship where both of us are open to each other's interests, even if they aren't the same. Perhaps one night we go for a walk in the woods, whereas another night we go club dancing together. See a film one night, and go to a hockey game on another night. Yes, I realize this means I'd have to come out of my crab shell (the new horoscope is a farce, I am and always will be a stereotypical Cancer) and try something new, but I do hope it's one of those things where I really wouldn't mind trying it, especially with her.
A few other things I'm looking for:
1. Intelligence. She doesn't have to be smarter than me, but I really don't want to marry someone as dumb as rocks.
2. Listening to me. Yes, I know, it usually is the reciprocal. However, I've found that there are some girls that really don't want to get to know me. I've been using an online dating site, and there are a number of girls that contact me, haven't read my entire profile, set stuff up, and once they read the whole thing, decide the answer is no. I will admit, one girl did think a good first date was to get me a haircut. I'm sure many of you knew my answer to that.
3. The right amount of connection. Some people will know I am a touchy-feely person. It sort of comes with the whole growing up in the North Country, where evenings can get really cold, and I'd rather either she were there to keep me warm at night, or more likely, I were there to keep her warm at night. However, I don't want to be smothered. She shouldn't suffocate me (in the literal OR figurative sense), or send me 15 texts a day (unless of course I send 13-16), especially if they're one word and have no meaning. However, I don't want her to ignore me, because then I would feel alone.
I realize this stuff is pretty generic, and I'm not very picky about looks. Some of it may be cryptic, but at least I do understand it for myself.