FF: Crossroads 16
Title: Cross Roads
Chapter: 16
Summary: Life is never easy and is forever tossing curve balls. Gibbs has been caught in the explosion, but what is happening with everyone else. This is a SlashMPreg story, nothing to graphic but rating may change as the story continues.
TV Show: NCIS
Characters: DiNozzo/Gibbs, Ducky, Ziva, McGee, Abby, Jen
Disclaimer: I don't own them, only wish that I did.
A/N: This is a work in progress, not sure how far it will go, but hopefully it's worth the ride!
Abby had been so caught up in the code that she and McGee had been working on that she had almost lost track of the time. With a start she jumped up from her stool and smacked McGee Gibbs style as she reached over to her speaker phone.
“What the? Abby what was that for?”
“It’s been over two hours! Why didn’t you notice the time?”
She couldn’t believe that she’d almost forgotten.
She quickly dialled the number and held her breath as the call went through. She didn’t know if she felt relieved that it was answered in two rings or if she should be worried that it was answered so quickly.
Then she heard the voice on the other end of phone and she knew what she felt.
Rage.
It took her a moment before she could form words, but when she did she let rip.
“What the hell are you doing there?”
“Abbs...”
“What have you done to Tony now? Put him on the phone right this minute I want to talk to him!”
“Abbs!” Gibbs tried again, a little louder this time.
“You had better not have hurt him. If you hurt him there is nowhere on this planet that you’ll be able to hide. Remember I’m one of the few people who can kill you and leave no trace, no body no nothing...”
“ABBY!” Gibbs was almost shouting as he moved into the kitchen so he didn’t wake Tony. He couldn’t really blame her. She and Tony had always had a special relationship.
“I swear if you hurt him...”
“Abby I don’t want to hurt him. I never did.”
Abby simply looked at the speaker phone with an incredulous look on her face.
The silence stretched out as Gibbs waited, determined not to be the first to break the silence.
“Put. Tony. On.” Abby said slowly.
“No.”
“No?”
“That’s right Abby I said no. What part of no do you not understand?” He rubbed his hand over his face suddenly weary. He wanted to check on Tony, make sure that he was still sleeping peacefully. But he couldn’t do that while he was on the phone with Abby, especially not while he was feeling this frustrated.
“Look either you let me talk to Tony or I’m coming over there.”
Gibbs could hear McGee in the background trying to calm her down. He didn’t need to be there to be able to picture the look on her face or see her pacing around her lab. He knew that she was pissed.
Majorly pissed at him.
And he didn’t blame her.
Not in the least.
But he was where he needed to be, doing what he needed to do. And he wasn’t going to let anyone interfere. He needed to be here taking care of Tony, be there for him. He didn’t kid himself. He knew that he had a lot to do before he had any hope of proving himself to Tony again. Hell if he was being honest with himself he had a lot to do to make it up to all of his family. But he was going to try. Or die trying.
And wasn’t that a possibility that he didn’t really want to give much thought to. If he managed to piss any one of his family off then death could be a strong possibility. Maybe even preferable.
He sighed.
“Look Abbs, he’s asleep. I promise you, he is ok and if he hadn’t only just fallen asleep I would let you talk to him yourself.”
Abby stopped mid rant. Gibbs sounded tired. Weary even.
“He’s ok? You promise me he’s ok?”
As much as she wanted to she’d never been able to stay mad at him for long, and this was no different. She felt herself wavering, weaking, starting to worry about him as well. But she was more worried about Tony.
“Abbs.”
“Let me talk to her boss.”
Gibbs looked up startled. He hadn’t heard Tony enter the kitchen. He wondered just how long Tony had been standing there listening. How much he’d heard, seen.
“Tony...”
Tony nodded and held out his hand for the phone.
Gibbs looked at him closely before he handed the phone over. Tony looked exhausted and pale. He felt an overwhelming urge to hustle Tony into bed, draw the covers up and lock out the rest of the world for a while so that he could get the rest and peace that he needed at the moment. Instead he reluctantly handed the phone over and watched for any sign that Tony may need help.
“Hey Abbs.” Tony said as he leant against the counter.
“Tony!” Abby squealed down the phone.
He couldn’t help but wince and he knew that Gibbs saw it also. He saw Gibbs move to him but he waved him off.
“Abbs...”
“Oh my god, are you all right, do you want me to come over? I can be there in half an hour if you need me to.”
He couldn’t stop the smile that spread across his face. No matter how crappy he felt he could always rely on Abby to make him feel better. To make him laugh.
“It’s all right Abbs, I’m fine and I’m sure that whatever you and McGoogle are working on is very important and interesting.”
Abby was torn between continuing what she was working on and high tailing it over to Tony’s to help him. She really really wanted to be there with Tony, maybe watching a movie or just keeping him company or even just watching him sleep. But she had to admit that she was caught up in what she was doing with McGee, the code that they were working on was truly amazing.
“Honestly Abbs, I’m fine. Gibbs is here so you don’t need to worry.”
Abby sat down in front of the speaker phone.
“That’s right, Gibbs is there. If you don’t want to be alone with him I don’t mind coming over. I can get there real fast if you want some back up.”
Tony laughed. If he didn’t feel so shitty this would almost be amusing. He was reminded why he loved her so much, she was truly the sister that he’d always wanted.
“Thanks Abbs.” Tony almost sighed. “But it’s fine. I promise I’ll call if I need anything or when Gibbs leaves. You just go back to what you were doing. I’ll talk to you later.”
“If you’re sure....”
Tony laughed again.
Gibbs felt his heart beat a little faster at the sound. It had been way to long since he’d heard Tony laughing. But he was still worried about how Tony looked.
“Go Abbs, have fun and Tim,” Tony paused until he knew that he had McGee’s attention. “Make sure she doesn’t OD on Caff-Pow again. You remember what happened last time.”
Gibbs found himself wondering what had happened and when the last time had been. Not for the first time he wondered how much of his memory was still missing and how much he’d missed while he’d been hiding in Mexico. He waited as Tony finished talking to Abby and McGee and hung up. He gave Tony a couple of minutes to himself then he moved to lead Tony back to the lounge. He really didn’t like the way that Tony was looking.
Tony closed his eyes for a moment as he leant back against the counter. His head hurt, his eyes burned and his stomach roiled. He felt Gibbs approach him and gently lead him back to the lounge. He felt himself relaxing, he remembered how good he always felt when Gibbs was near. How loved and safe he always felt. He could feel Gibbs looking at him and he couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his face. This felt so normal.
“Would you rather go to bed?” Gibbs asked quietly. He knew that Tony’s lounge was comfortable. He remembered sleeping there in the past. He remembered many nights that they had cuddled up together on that lounge watching one of Tony’s many movies. But with the concussion Gibbs thought that he might feel better in his bed. He was about to ask if he preferred to stay where he was when he saw the smile slip from Tony’s face as he tensed. “I didn’t mean together Tony, you need to get some sleep...”
He didn’t get any further before Tony bolted from the lounge and raced to the bathroom. Gibbs followed closely and reached the door as Tony collapsed in front of the toilet throwing up what looked to be the entire contents of his stomach.
Gibbs winced in sympathy as Tony was sick. He took his time as he wet a hand towel with warm water before he knelt behind Tony, soothing him and talking softly to him until the heaving eased and Tony slumped back into Gibbs arms. Gibbs gently wiped Tony’s face with the towel and gave him a few moments to rally himself.
“So how concerned should I be right now Tony?” Gibbs whispered in Tony’s ear. “Was that because of the concussion or because of the pregnancy?”
Tony froze at Gibbs question. He knew? How the hell did he know?
Was he sick because of the concussion? No he didn’t think so. It felt more like his morning sickness than his concussion. And the fact that he could tell the difference between the two was really quite scary. Maybe he hadn’t heard Gibbs correctly. After all he’d made sure that he’d been careful about what he said and did around Gibbs.
“I know Tony.” Gibbs said when it became clear that Tony wasn’t going to answer. He’d felt Tony tense, and he hated that Tony had reacted that way. He tightened his hold on Tony a little to reassure himself that he was there and then continued to gently wipe the warm towel over Tony’s forehead, soothing, calming. “Were you going to tell me? Or were you going to leave when you figured out that I was staying?”
“I...uh...I...” Tony didn’t know what to say.
“It’s all right Tony, you don’t have to answer.” Gibbs sighed. “I’m sorry.”
Tony struggled a little trying to sit up and look at Gibbs.
Gibbs had just apologised to him. Again.
“Huh?”
“I’m sorry Tony. I’m sorry for leaving, I’m sorry for the way I came back, I’m sorry for the way I told you I was staying and I’m sorry for leaving you to face all of this on your own Tony.”
“You’re apologising?”
Tony was stunned. Then he felt his stomach turn again and he struggled to make it back to the toilet in time before he started throwing up again.
Gibbs sighed. He knew that he was running out of chances with Tony. He had to show everything, be willing to talk, to beg for forgiveness. But first he had to take care of Tony now. He’d thought it was just morning sickness, but now he wasn’t so sure. How far along was he anyway? Did he even have morning sickness? God he’d missed out on so much and there was just no getting that back.
“I’m not dying am I? Ducky wasn’t lying to me when he said it was just a mild concussion was he?” Tony said as this round eased off and he slumped back into Gibbs arms again.
Gibbs continued to gently wipe Tony’s face and neck with the warm damp towel. He just wished that there was more he could do to help. But he couldn’t help chuckle at what Tony had said.
“Not as far as I know. The medics said you were all right, and Ducky agreed. Besides your head is too thick for a simple bump to do much damage.”
Tony laughed, then groaned as the pain in his head made its presence known over the churning of his stomach. He hated concussions at the best of times, and having a concussion while you were pregnant and suffering morning sickness really sucked.
Gibbs was starting to feel the chill from the tiles seeping into him and he worried about Tony getting cold as well.
“We’ll just stay here for a couple of minutes, give your stomach a chance to settle down a little before we try moving you to your bed. How does that sound?” Gibbs asked after sitting there for a few minutes.
Tony sighed. Apart from his head thumping and his stomach churning he felt comfortable and didn’t want to move. It felt so good to be in Gibbs’ arms again, to be able to smell the sawdust and coffee smell that was so uniquely Gibbs. The feel of Gibbs’ fingers gently carding through his hair in the way that he loved, the way that never failed to soothe him. He really didn’t want to move.
But then just as he thought it might be safe to try his stomach made itself known again. He had enough time to groan before he was dry heaving into the toilet. There was nothing left to throw up.
“Ok this just isn’t right, I’m calling Ducky.” Gibbs said as he moved to kneel behind Tony to help support him. He could see that Tony was on his last legs. He was exhausted and hurting. “I don’t remember Shannon’s morning sickness ever being this bad.”
Tony groaned before he heaved again.
Gibbs waited for the heaving to stop before he gently eased Tony back again. He fished out his cell phone and pushed Ducky’s speed dial. He spilt his attention between trying to soothe Tony and his phone.
Gibbs was surprised when Ducky answered after only a few rings.
“This had better be important Jethro, do you have any idea what the time is?”
Gibbs groaned and looked at Tony.
“Sorry,” Gibbs winced as he took a moment to check the time. “I need you to come and check Tony out.” Gibbs stated, he knew that Ducky was still ticked at him, but he hoped that his friend would hear the worry in his voice.
Ducky was silent for a moment. “What is the problem?”
“I’m not sure, but he’s been vomiting.” He did a quick calculation, “It’s been nearly an hour and he’s now reduced to dry heaving. He said it wasn’t the concussion, but this seems a little excessive for morning sickness.”
“Right.”
Tony groaned again. He hated this. He hated people worrying about him. He knew that Ducky would be on his way soon, and Abby would hear about it soon after that. And the last time he’d heard Gibbs sound this worried? Well he’d still be in the hospital recovering from the plague. Yep this was sure the way to show everyone that he was capable of taking care of himself. But he had to admit that it felt good to have Gibbs here with him.
“Shh Tony, it’ll be all right.” Gibbs said. Then a memory hit him and he nearly swore. “What about your mother Duck?”
“Oh don’t worry about mother, she’s had her night cap and the night nurse is here to look after her anyway. I’ll be there shortly. Just try and keep him calm and warm.”
“Thanks Duck.” He put his cell back in his pocket and turned his full attention back to Tony.
“You didn’t have to call him, I’ll be fine in a minute.” Tony said
“Huh,” Gibbs grunted. If he wasn’t so worried about Tony right now he thought that sitting here with Tony would be nice. Ok maybe not the sitting on a cold tile floor, or Tony being so ill, but holding him was nice. It felt so right. He hadn’t felt like this since he’d spent those couple of nights watching over Tony while he was in hospital. “I’m not taking any chances with you Tony. You’re too important.”
Tony eased back a little and turned to look at Gibbs. What he saw took his breath away. For the first time since the damn bomb had taken his lovers memory he could see the love in his eyes and he knew that Gibbs remembered him, remembered them. The love that they shared was so easy to see that he felt humbled all over again, just like the first time he saw that look in Gibbs eyes directed at him. For the first time in a very long time Tony didn’t have anything to say. He eased back and rest against Gibbs, soaking up his warmth and love and wishing that his head would stop thumping and his stomach would settle down. He couldn’t stop the smile that spread as Gibbs gently rubbing him with the warm cloth. He was starting to get drowsy now, but he was so content that he didn’t care.
Gibbs continued his gentle ministrations, soothing and comforting as best he could. He knew the moment that Tony relaxed and when he was becoming drowsy. He knew it was time to try and move Tony to a warmer, softer more comfortable place like his bed.
Gibbs nudged Tony to get his attention. “Hey how about we try moving you to your bed?”
“Huh?” Tony asked.
“How about we try moving. Your bed will be much more comfortable than this cold hard floor Tony.”
“D’n’t wanna move. ‘M fine here.”
Gibbs chuckled. “You’ll thank me in the morning, besides you don’t want Ducky to find you in here do you?”
Tony snorted. “Wouldn’t be the first time.”
Gibbs wasn’t sure how he felt about that and again wondered how much he’d missed while he was in Mexico and how much Tony had needed him while he’d been gone. He eased Tony to a more upright position then moved so that he could help him up.
“Come on Tony, you don’t really want to sleep on this cold hard floor. Let’s get you to bed so you’ll be more comfortable.”
“OK.” Tony sighed. He couldn’t believe how tired he was. No tired didn’t really cover it and he knew that Gibbs was right. But damn he didn’t really want to move either, to lose contact with Gibbs again, it was almost like a physical ache that thumped in time with his head. He let Gibbs help him up and then help him to his bedroom and grimaced as he realised just what Gibbs would be seeing. How stark and unlived in his apartment was, especially his bedroom. But there was nothing that he could do about it now and he didn’t really care.
Gibbs looked around and was shocked at the lack of decoration that was in the master bedroom. There was a large bed, complete with the quality high thread count linen which was expected. There was one night stand and that was all. The room was stark and so un-Tony like that Gibbs was a little taken aback by it. It was another reminder of just how much Tony had to have been hurting, even struggling while he was gone that he again found himself hating himself for what he had put Tony through, what he’d put them all through.
He stopped Tony and took a moment to pull the covers back on the bed for him before he eased him into bed. He got Tony settled then headed out to get a bottle of water before heading back.
“Here Tony, have a drink before you go to sleep.” Gibbs said as he sat on the edge of the bed next to Tony. He knew that he needed to get Tony to drink something after all the vomiting he’d just done.
“Thanks.”
Gibbs waited until Tony had finished drinking before he made a move. “Ducky should be here soon, I’ll go and wait for him in the lounge. You try and get some rest Tony.”
“No!” Tony sat up. As much as he’d been hurt by Gibbs actions, he could understand them. But he’d missed his lover while he’d been gone, and he’d tried to stay away from him when he’d come back in fear of being hurt again. But having him so close, being able to touch him, be held by him had been too much and he wasn’t strong enough to deny himself that comfort any longer. Not now that he knew that he could have it again. That Gibbs was here, really here. He was tired of being the strong one and just wanted Gibbs to stay with him. Talk to him. The rest they could work out later. “Stay. Please.”
Gibbs studied Tony for a moment before he’d moved to the other side of the bed and sat down and was pleased when Tony turned to him and reached out for him.
“I really should go and wait for Ducky, let him in.” Gibbs said as he started to gently card his fingers through Tony’s hair. Again he was struck by how right, how normal this felt and he wondered again how he could so totally forget this. Tony was one of the best things that had ever happened to him.
Tony shook his head. “He has a key and he usually just lets himself in.”
“He has a key?”
“Mmmm,” Tony murmured as he was soothed by the gentle rhythm of Gibbs fingers. “Seemed to be logical. Ducky’s been here a lot over the past couple of months, just seemed easier to give him a key in case of emergencies. Abbs has one as well.”
“Has it been bad? The morning sickness?” Gibbs asked after a couple of minutes. He’d noticed that Tony was starting to drift off, but he wanted to know.
“Hmm?” Tony asked making an effort to open his eyes and concentrate.
“Has the morning sickness been bad?” Gibbs asked again.
“Yeah.” Tony sighed. He knew that it was no use lying, that Gibbs would find out the truth. “The docs have me on some meds that help, but it’s still pretty rough.”
“I wish there was something I could do Tony.” Gibbs said softly.
Tony smiled. “It’s not so bad. Abby and Ducky have been there for me all the time. And Brad’s been great as well. Besides your here now.”
“And I’m not going anywhere.”
“Well that’s good to hear Jethro. But now tell me what has been going on.” Ducky said from the doorway.
He may still be annoyed at his old friend, but even he couldn’t deny how much better Tony was when Gibbs was around. They were good for each other, which was why he’d been pleased when they had first gotten together. He half wondered where Abby and Timothy were, they had said that they were going to spend the night at Tony’s.
“Hey Ducky, you didn’t need to come.” Tony said as he sat up and leant back against his headboard.
“Why don’t you let me be the judge of that.”
“He’s been vomiting Ducky, he says it’s not from the concussion but I wanted to be sure. It seemed a little excessive for morning sickness.”
“Ah, my dear boy.” Ducky set his bag down next to the bed. “You are still taking the medication that Brad prescribed I take it. The full does?”
“Yes Ducky.”
Ducky nodded and got his pen light out to check Tony’s reactions, making sure that the concussion wasn’t worse. Then he followed up with a couple of other checks just to make sure that nothing more serious was the problem before he nodded to himself.
“Duck?”
“Hmm?” He reached into his bag and retrieved a syringe and a vile of medicine to help ease Tony’s nausea.
“So?”
“Oh yes, sorry. You were right to call me Jethro. Though Tony was correct he was probably ill due to his morning sickness, however the concussion would not have helped. I dare say that the vomiting didn’t help with your headache any either did it my dear boy.”
“Not a lot.” Tony mumbled as he leaned against Gibbs.
“I’ll give you something to help ease the nausea and also the dull the headache a little, though I can’t give you to strong as you well know.” Ducky said as he prepared the syringe and then used the medical wipe to cleanse the injection area. “There this should help, you should start to feel better shortly. I would also suggest that you use your oxygen tonight.”
“Aww Ducky you know I hate it, the tube gets all tangled and it’s just plain annoying.”
Ducky chuckled. “You may hate it, but you’re body is taxed enough trying to heal itself and create a new life. I think it wise to ease a little of the strain in any way that we can. Don’t you?”
“But I’m breathing fine, not a wheeze in sight! And the irritation of the tube will just make my headache worse....”
“Tony,” Ducky said as he held out the nasal cannula, “do you want me to call Brad and have him come over?”
Tony sulked, held out his hand and snuggled closer to Gibbs all at the same time. He knew when he was fighting a losing battle. “Not fair Ducky.”
Gibbs was a little shocked. He had vague memories about Tony needing oxygen sometimes, after his run in with the plague his lungs just weren’t what they used to be. But he hadn’t thought that Tony had needed the extra help breathing for a while. To hear Tony and Ducky discussing it like it was an old argument was a big enough shock, to see the oxygen tanks set up and within easy reach of Tony’s bed was a bigger one. He wondered how he hadn’t noticed them earlier.
“That’s better.” He took a moment to gather his equipment together and safely store the used syringe and make sure that the oxygen was flowing before he looked at Gibbs and Tony again. “I thought that Abby and young Timothy were going to stay with you tonight?” He asked as he focused on his old friend.
“They were, but they got called back to work.” Tony said as he fiddled with the cannula trying to make it a little more comfortable. As bad as he’d been feeling he couldn’t help but feel content and he couldn’t stop himself from reaching out and touching Gibbs, reassuring himself that Gibbs was actually there with him and he wasn’t a figment of his imagination.
Ducky watched the interaction between Tony and Gibbs. He couldn’t help acknowledge that they were good for each other, balanced each other. He also found himself wondering if Gibbs had anything to do with the two younger peoples absence.
“It was nothing to do with me Duck.”
“Uh huh.” Ducky grunted, not really surprised that Gibbs had guessed what he had been thinking. He believed his old friend, so that left only one person who had the authority to recall any of them. He’d take this up with her later. He turned his attention back to a sleepy Tony. “Now my boy, you are not to be alone tonight. Just because I agree that this isn’t related to your concussion does not mean that you can ignore that fact that you have a concussion. I would be happy to stay and you company tonight.”
Tony looked over at Ducky and smiled. He was struck again by how lucky he was. Before coming to NCIS no one had cared this much about him. He knew that Ducky was watching out for him, trying to give him an out for being alone with Gibbs. But for the first time since Gibbs had returned he really didn’t want his lover, ex-lover, whatever, to leave.
“Thanks Ducky, but I think I’ll be fine.”
“I’ll be staying Duck.” Gibbs said at almost the same time.
“Now do try and get a little sleep my dear boy. I’ll stop by later and check on how you are doing.” Ducky said as he stood and made his way to the door. He had to admit, even though he was still annoyed with Gibbs, that Gibbs was better for Tony than any medication he could provide Tony with.
“Thanks Ducky.” Tony said as he sleep began to claim him.
Gibbs ran his hand through Tony’s hair, making sure that Tony was comfortable, then made his way to follow Ducky out. He still had a few questions for his old friend.
“Duck.”
Ducky turned and looked at his old friend. For the first time he noticed just how tired and stressed Gibbs seemed to be. Not that most people would noticed. It took him a little by surprise.
“Yes Jethro?”
“Ah,” Gibbs hesitated, looking back to the closed bedroom door. He knew that Ducky was still pissed at him. “Thanks Duck.”
Ducky just nodded and waited. He knew that that wasn’t why Gibbs had followed him out.
“How worried should I be Ducky? About Tony?” Gibbs asked almost hesitantly. He’d been doing some homework, not trusting his memory on something so important. But he didn’t know what the concussion would mean at the moment and the added complication of his scarred lungs.
Ducky sighed. “I’m sure you know a little about male pregnancy. I won’t lie to you Jethro, with Tony’s medical history and his line of work Tony’s in the high risk category. Which is exactly why Tony is taking no chances and has Brad, myself and Dr Morgan keeping a close eye on him. As well as the rest of his family. And as you have no doubt guessed from what you have witnessed tonight, his pregnancy has not been an easy one so far. But having said that Tony is doing extremely well. The concussion is a minor worry, but keep in mind he has had worse.”
“Dr Morgan?”
“His specialist. Highly respected in her field.”
Gibbs nodded. “Is there anything special I need to do or watch out for?”
“No, just do the usual concussion checks during the night. If you’re unsure of anything call me and I’ll come right away. The medication that I gave him should keep his nausea bearable until he takes his next dose in the morning. It should also help him sleep a little easier. Also make sure that he keeps the nasal cannula on, he has a tendency to take it off when he sleeps.”
“How bad has it been? The morning sickness, shouldn’t it be easing up about now?”
“Ah,” Ducky smiled sadly. “Unfortunately our Tony has been suffering from severe morning sickness, while most people will experience it at some stage during their pregnancy some suffer it more than others. Then there are the few who are unlucky to suffer it throughout their entire pregnancy. Unfortunately Tony seems to be one of the truly unlucky ones who will experience morning sickness all the way through his pregnancy. All we can do is help him as he needs it I’m afraid. He has his medications and his morning sickness survival kits which he has stashed around to help him, but even so at times they aren’t going to be enough. Also as the pregnancy progresses he may find he has trouble breathing, but with the help of some oxygen it shouldn’t cause too much of a problem.”
“He never does things the easy way.” Gibbs said as he wiped his hand over his face.
Ducky chuckled. “No, no he doesn’t. But then neither do you.”
Gibbs looked at Ducky, tried to read his expression and gave it up. When he wanted to be Ducky could be impossible to read.
“Now, go and take care of that dear boy in there. It is not often that we are given a second chance. Or even a third. Do not screw it up my friend.”
Gibbs nodded and then headed back to Tony’s room to check on him. Ducky’s message had been received loud and clear. Screw up again with Tony and there would be hell to pay. The more he learned about his family had coped while he was in Mexico, the worse he felt. He should never have run. It wasn’t him, never had been, and now all he could do was beg and plead for forgiveness from all of his family. Especially from Tony.
He detoured past the kitchen to grab another bottle of water before he went to check on Tony. He paused at the door and took a moment to pull himself together. He needed to be strong, to be willing to open himself up, to listen, but most of all to be there. Something he hadn’t been so good at since Shannon and Kelly had been killed. But he was willing to try now.
He opened the door and nearly dropped the bottle he was carrying when he saw Tony sitting on the edge of his bed, pulling the cannula off and about to get up.
“Tony you need to leave that on and lay down, try and get some rest.”
Tony hated to admit it but he’d been anxious when Gibbs had left him. He didn’t think that Gibbs was leaving, but then again he hadn’t expected his lover to run off to Mexico either. When he didn’t hear yelling or slamming doors he’d wanted to investigate, but he hadn’t gotten very far. Between his latest bout with the toilet, his concussion and whatever Ducky had just slipped him he was as weak as a kitten. And he hated it. Hated how vulnerable he felt. Hated how close to the surface his emotions were at the moment. Hated that after all his hard work, and how much Gibbs had hurt him he didn’t want him to leave again. Not now, not ever.
“Here, have a sip of this and then we’ll get you back into bed so you can get some sleep.” Gibbs said as he sat next to Tony. After so long apart he couldn’t stop the thrill he felt at being so close to Tony again.
“Thanks.” Tony lent against Gibbs, and felt himself relax as the smell of coffee and sawdust surrounded him. He wished that this moment could last, that he could forget all the pain of the past couple of months. That it was just him and Gibbs and everything was perfect.
Gibbs smiled, then eased himself up and helped Tony lay down and get settled again. He could see that Tony was tired, but fighting it. When he was satisfied that Tony was comfortable he lent down and gently kissed his forehead. He knew now that he had a chance, and that was all that he wanted.
“Get some sleep Tony. I’ll be out in the lounge if you need anything.”
Tony sat up suddenly as he felt Gibbs leaving. He reached out and grabbed his wrist. “No! Don’t go.”
“It’s all right Tony, I’m not going far.”
Gibbs tried to release his wrist from Tony’s grip without hurting him, but Tony was having none of it.
“No, please. Just stay here. Please.”
Gibbs looked at Tony, “You sure? I promise I’m not going to leave, I was just going to sleep on your couch.”
Tony shook his head. “Stay here. Please ‘Ro.”
Gibbs moved to the other side of the bed. “OK, but you have to promise to get some sleep Tony.”
Tony waited until Gibbs was settled down next to him before he reached out to touch him again. He needed the physical contact.
“I looked for you when you left you know.” Tony said quietly.
Gibbs moved so that he was facing Tony, he reached out and started to card his fingers through Tony’s hair, the way he remembered he liked it.
“I know.” Gibbs said softly, hoping that he could lull Tony to sleep. “I think I knew that you would search for me. I’m sorry that I left you alone Tony.”
“S’kay, I think I kind of understand why you left now.” Tony said as he snuggled closer.
That got Gibbs attention. “Huh?”
“I didn’t before, but I think I get it now. You’d just lost you family. I didn’t get that before, never really understood what family meant. Until now.”
Now Gibbs really was intrigued. “What do you mean Tony?”
“Family is important. Your family should be everything to you, and you lost yours. You were lost so you had to leave, to help find yourself. I get that now. I have a family now and I’d do anything to protect them.” Tony yawned. “Never had that before. Always wondered what I was missing.”
“Ah hell Tony.” Gibbs pulled Tony closer to him.
“S’kay, really.” Tony said, he was desperately trying to avoid falling asleep. “So you said you wanted to try and make it up to me. How are you planning on doing that.”
Gibbs smiled, he knew exactly what Tony was doing and why. But he also knew that if he kept gently carding his fingers through Tony’s hair and speaking softly to him he’d be asleep in no time. He decided to play along.
“Well I thought I’d start by trying to woo you Tony, maybe take you on a date.”
“Date sounds nice, but not sure I wanna go out.”
Gibbs chuckled at that. Typical Tony. “Okay, so how about a date. Tonight. Here.”
“Tonight?”
Gibbs nodded and lowered his voice a little more. He could tell that Tony was losing his battle and decided to start making some plans.
“Yep, tonight Tony. After you’ve gotten some sleep. I’ll cook for you and then we can watch a movie, your choice.” Gibbs stopped and checked to see if Tony was still awake, when he saw that he was, just barely, he continued. “And you can ask me anything you like Tony. No more secrets.”
Tony looked up into Gibbs eyes, and was surprised to see that Gibbs meant it. It was a humbling feeling.
“Anything?”
“About my personal life, yes. About my career, as long as it’s not classified. I’ll answer anything that I can, just remember there are still some holes up there.”
“Wow.”
Gibbs chuckled. It was good to know that he could still surprise Tony.
“Now go to sleep Tony. The sooner you sleep the sooner we can start our date.”
Tony closed his eyes and moved so that his head rested on Gibbs shoulder. The gentle fingers carding through his hair and the sound of Gibbs breathing and heart beat soon had him drifting off to sleep.
Gibbs couldn’t stop the smile that spread across his face. This was more than he’d hoped for. He had his chance and this time he wasn’t going to mess it up.
While he watched Tony sleep he started to plan their date.
Chapter: 16
Summary: Life is never easy and is forever tossing curve balls. Gibbs has been caught in the explosion, but what is happening with everyone else. This is a SlashMPreg story, nothing to graphic but rating may change as the story continues.
TV Show: NCIS
Characters: DiNozzo/Gibbs, Ducky, Ziva, McGee, Abby, Jen
Disclaimer: I don't own them, only wish that I did.
A/N: This is a work in progress, not sure how far it will go, but hopefully it's worth the ride!
Abby had been so caught up in the code that she and McGee had been working on that she had almost lost track of the time. With a start she jumped up from her stool and smacked McGee Gibbs style as she reached over to her speaker phone.
“What the? Abby what was that for?”
“It’s been over two hours! Why didn’t you notice the time?”
She couldn’t believe that she’d almost forgotten.
She quickly dialled the number and held her breath as the call went through. She didn’t know if she felt relieved that it was answered in two rings or if she should be worried that it was answered so quickly.
Then she heard the voice on the other end of phone and she knew what she felt.
Rage.
It took her a moment before she could form words, but when she did she let rip.
“What the hell are you doing there?”
“Abbs...”
“What have you done to Tony now? Put him on the phone right this minute I want to talk to him!”
“Abbs!” Gibbs tried again, a little louder this time.
“You had better not have hurt him. If you hurt him there is nowhere on this planet that you’ll be able to hide. Remember I’m one of the few people who can kill you and leave no trace, no body no nothing...”
“ABBY!” Gibbs was almost shouting as he moved into the kitchen so he didn’t wake Tony. He couldn’t really blame her. She and Tony had always had a special relationship.
“I swear if you hurt him...”
“Abby I don’t want to hurt him. I never did.”
Abby simply looked at the speaker phone with an incredulous look on her face.
The silence stretched out as Gibbs waited, determined not to be the first to break the silence.
“Put. Tony. On.” Abby said slowly.
“No.”
“No?”
“That’s right Abby I said no. What part of no do you not understand?” He rubbed his hand over his face suddenly weary. He wanted to check on Tony, make sure that he was still sleeping peacefully. But he couldn’t do that while he was on the phone with Abby, especially not while he was feeling this frustrated.
“Look either you let me talk to Tony or I’m coming over there.”
Gibbs could hear McGee in the background trying to calm her down. He didn’t need to be there to be able to picture the look on her face or see her pacing around her lab. He knew that she was pissed.
Majorly pissed at him.
And he didn’t blame her.
Not in the least.
But he was where he needed to be, doing what he needed to do. And he wasn’t going to let anyone interfere. He needed to be here taking care of Tony, be there for him. He didn’t kid himself. He knew that he had a lot to do before he had any hope of proving himself to Tony again. Hell if he was being honest with himself he had a lot to do to make it up to all of his family. But he was going to try. Or die trying.
And wasn’t that a possibility that he didn’t really want to give much thought to. If he managed to piss any one of his family off then death could be a strong possibility. Maybe even preferable.
He sighed.
“Look Abbs, he’s asleep. I promise you, he is ok and if he hadn’t only just fallen asleep I would let you talk to him yourself.”
Abby stopped mid rant. Gibbs sounded tired. Weary even.
“He’s ok? You promise me he’s ok?”
As much as she wanted to she’d never been able to stay mad at him for long, and this was no different. She felt herself wavering, weaking, starting to worry about him as well. But she was more worried about Tony.
“Abbs.”
“Let me talk to her boss.”
Gibbs looked up startled. He hadn’t heard Tony enter the kitchen. He wondered just how long Tony had been standing there listening. How much he’d heard, seen.
“Tony...”
Tony nodded and held out his hand for the phone.
Gibbs looked at him closely before he handed the phone over. Tony looked exhausted and pale. He felt an overwhelming urge to hustle Tony into bed, draw the covers up and lock out the rest of the world for a while so that he could get the rest and peace that he needed at the moment. Instead he reluctantly handed the phone over and watched for any sign that Tony may need help.
“Hey Abbs.” Tony said as he leant against the counter.
“Tony!” Abby squealed down the phone.
He couldn’t help but wince and he knew that Gibbs saw it also. He saw Gibbs move to him but he waved him off.
“Abbs...”
“Oh my god, are you all right, do you want me to come over? I can be there in half an hour if you need me to.”
He couldn’t stop the smile that spread across his face. No matter how crappy he felt he could always rely on Abby to make him feel better. To make him laugh.
“It’s all right Abbs, I’m fine and I’m sure that whatever you and McGoogle are working on is very important and interesting.”
Abby was torn between continuing what she was working on and high tailing it over to Tony’s to help him. She really really wanted to be there with Tony, maybe watching a movie or just keeping him company or even just watching him sleep. But she had to admit that she was caught up in what she was doing with McGee, the code that they were working on was truly amazing.
“Honestly Abbs, I’m fine. Gibbs is here so you don’t need to worry.”
Abby sat down in front of the speaker phone.
“That’s right, Gibbs is there. If you don’t want to be alone with him I don’t mind coming over. I can get there real fast if you want some back up.”
Tony laughed. If he didn’t feel so shitty this would almost be amusing. He was reminded why he loved her so much, she was truly the sister that he’d always wanted.
“Thanks Abbs.” Tony almost sighed. “But it’s fine. I promise I’ll call if I need anything or when Gibbs leaves. You just go back to what you were doing. I’ll talk to you later.”
“If you’re sure....”
Tony laughed again.
Gibbs felt his heart beat a little faster at the sound. It had been way to long since he’d heard Tony laughing. But he was still worried about how Tony looked.
“Go Abbs, have fun and Tim,” Tony paused until he knew that he had McGee’s attention. “Make sure she doesn’t OD on Caff-Pow again. You remember what happened last time.”
Gibbs found himself wondering what had happened and when the last time had been. Not for the first time he wondered how much of his memory was still missing and how much he’d missed while he’d been hiding in Mexico. He waited as Tony finished talking to Abby and McGee and hung up. He gave Tony a couple of minutes to himself then he moved to lead Tony back to the lounge. He really didn’t like the way that Tony was looking.
Tony closed his eyes for a moment as he leant back against the counter. His head hurt, his eyes burned and his stomach roiled. He felt Gibbs approach him and gently lead him back to the lounge. He felt himself relaxing, he remembered how good he always felt when Gibbs was near. How loved and safe he always felt. He could feel Gibbs looking at him and he couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his face. This felt so normal.
“Would you rather go to bed?” Gibbs asked quietly. He knew that Tony’s lounge was comfortable. He remembered sleeping there in the past. He remembered many nights that they had cuddled up together on that lounge watching one of Tony’s many movies. But with the concussion Gibbs thought that he might feel better in his bed. He was about to ask if he preferred to stay where he was when he saw the smile slip from Tony’s face as he tensed. “I didn’t mean together Tony, you need to get some sleep...”
He didn’t get any further before Tony bolted from the lounge and raced to the bathroom. Gibbs followed closely and reached the door as Tony collapsed in front of the toilet throwing up what looked to be the entire contents of his stomach.
Gibbs winced in sympathy as Tony was sick. He took his time as he wet a hand towel with warm water before he knelt behind Tony, soothing him and talking softly to him until the heaving eased and Tony slumped back into Gibbs arms. Gibbs gently wiped Tony’s face with the towel and gave him a few moments to rally himself.
“So how concerned should I be right now Tony?” Gibbs whispered in Tony’s ear. “Was that because of the concussion or because of the pregnancy?”
Tony froze at Gibbs question. He knew? How the hell did he know?
Was he sick because of the concussion? No he didn’t think so. It felt more like his morning sickness than his concussion. And the fact that he could tell the difference between the two was really quite scary. Maybe he hadn’t heard Gibbs correctly. After all he’d made sure that he’d been careful about what he said and did around Gibbs.
“I know Tony.” Gibbs said when it became clear that Tony wasn’t going to answer. He’d felt Tony tense, and he hated that Tony had reacted that way. He tightened his hold on Tony a little to reassure himself that he was there and then continued to gently wipe the warm towel over Tony’s forehead, soothing, calming. “Were you going to tell me? Or were you going to leave when you figured out that I was staying?”
“I...uh...I...” Tony didn’t know what to say.
“It’s all right Tony, you don’t have to answer.” Gibbs sighed. “I’m sorry.”
Tony struggled a little trying to sit up and look at Gibbs.
Gibbs had just apologised to him. Again.
“Huh?”
“I’m sorry Tony. I’m sorry for leaving, I’m sorry for the way I came back, I’m sorry for the way I told you I was staying and I’m sorry for leaving you to face all of this on your own Tony.”
“You’re apologising?”
Tony was stunned. Then he felt his stomach turn again and he struggled to make it back to the toilet in time before he started throwing up again.
Gibbs sighed. He knew that he was running out of chances with Tony. He had to show everything, be willing to talk, to beg for forgiveness. But first he had to take care of Tony now. He’d thought it was just morning sickness, but now he wasn’t so sure. How far along was he anyway? Did he even have morning sickness? God he’d missed out on so much and there was just no getting that back.
“I’m not dying am I? Ducky wasn’t lying to me when he said it was just a mild concussion was he?” Tony said as this round eased off and he slumped back into Gibbs arms again.
Gibbs continued to gently wipe Tony’s face and neck with the warm damp towel. He just wished that there was more he could do to help. But he couldn’t help chuckle at what Tony had said.
“Not as far as I know. The medics said you were all right, and Ducky agreed. Besides your head is too thick for a simple bump to do much damage.”
Tony laughed, then groaned as the pain in his head made its presence known over the churning of his stomach. He hated concussions at the best of times, and having a concussion while you were pregnant and suffering morning sickness really sucked.
Gibbs was starting to feel the chill from the tiles seeping into him and he worried about Tony getting cold as well.
“We’ll just stay here for a couple of minutes, give your stomach a chance to settle down a little before we try moving you to your bed. How does that sound?” Gibbs asked after sitting there for a few minutes.
Tony sighed. Apart from his head thumping and his stomach churning he felt comfortable and didn’t want to move. It felt so good to be in Gibbs’ arms again, to be able to smell the sawdust and coffee smell that was so uniquely Gibbs. The feel of Gibbs’ fingers gently carding through his hair in the way that he loved, the way that never failed to soothe him. He really didn’t want to move.
But then just as he thought it might be safe to try his stomach made itself known again. He had enough time to groan before he was dry heaving into the toilet. There was nothing left to throw up.
“Ok this just isn’t right, I’m calling Ducky.” Gibbs said as he moved to kneel behind Tony to help support him. He could see that Tony was on his last legs. He was exhausted and hurting. “I don’t remember Shannon’s morning sickness ever being this bad.”
Tony groaned before he heaved again.
Gibbs waited for the heaving to stop before he gently eased Tony back again. He fished out his cell phone and pushed Ducky’s speed dial. He spilt his attention between trying to soothe Tony and his phone.
Gibbs was surprised when Ducky answered after only a few rings.
“This had better be important Jethro, do you have any idea what the time is?”
Gibbs groaned and looked at Tony.
“Sorry,” Gibbs winced as he took a moment to check the time. “I need you to come and check Tony out.” Gibbs stated, he knew that Ducky was still ticked at him, but he hoped that his friend would hear the worry in his voice.
Ducky was silent for a moment. “What is the problem?”
“I’m not sure, but he’s been vomiting.” He did a quick calculation, “It’s been nearly an hour and he’s now reduced to dry heaving. He said it wasn’t the concussion, but this seems a little excessive for morning sickness.”
“Right.”
Tony groaned again. He hated this. He hated people worrying about him. He knew that Ducky would be on his way soon, and Abby would hear about it soon after that. And the last time he’d heard Gibbs sound this worried? Well he’d still be in the hospital recovering from the plague. Yep this was sure the way to show everyone that he was capable of taking care of himself. But he had to admit that it felt good to have Gibbs here with him.
“Shh Tony, it’ll be all right.” Gibbs said. Then a memory hit him and he nearly swore. “What about your mother Duck?”
“Oh don’t worry about mother, she’s had her night cap and the night nurse is here to look after her anyway. I’ll be there shortly. Just try and keep him calm and warm.”
“Thanks Duck.” He put his cell back in his pocket and turned his full attention back to Tony.
“You didn’t have to call him, I’ll be fine in a minute.” Tony said
“Huh,” Gibbs grunted. If he wasn’t so worried about Tony right now he thought that sitting here with Tony would be nice. Ok maybe not the sitting on a cold tile floor, or Tony being so ill, but holding him was nice. It felt so right. He hadn’t felt like this since he’d spent those couple of nights watching over Tony while he was in hospital. “I’m not taking any chances with you Tony. You’re too important.”
Tony eased back a little and turned to look at Gibbs. What he saw took his breath away. For the first time since the damn bomb had taken his lovers memory he could see the love in his eyes and he knew that Gibbs remembered him, remembered them. The love that they shared was so easy to see that he felt humbled all over again, just like the first time he saw that look in Gibbs eyes directed at him. For the first time in a very long time Tony didn’t have anything to say. He eased back and rest against Gibbs, soaking up his warmth and love and wishing that his head would stop thumping and his stomach would settle down. He couldn’t stop the smile that spread as Gibbs gently rubbing him with the warm cloth. He was starting to get drowsy now, but he was so content that he didn’t care.
Gibbs continued his gentle ministrations, soothing and comforting as best he could. He knew the moment that Tony relaxed and when he was becoming drowsy. He knew it was time to try and move Tony to a warmer, softer more comfortable place like his bed.
Gibbs nudged Tony to get his attention. “Hey how about we try moving you to your bed?”
“Huh?” Tony asked.
“How about we try moving. Your bed will be much more comfortable than this cold hard floor Tony.”
“D’n’t wanna move. ‘M fine here.”
Gibbs chuckled. “You’ll thank me in the morning, besides you don’t want Ducky to find you in here do you?”
Tony snorted. “Wouldn’t be the first time.”
Gibbs wasn’t sure how he felt about that and again wondered how much he’d missed while he was in Mexico and how much Tony had needed him while he’d been gone. He eased Tony to a more upright position then moved so that he could help him up.
“Come on Tony, you don’t really want to sleep on this cold hard floor. Let’s get you to bed so you’ll be more comfortable.”
“OK.” Tony sighed. He couldn’t believe how tired he was. No tired didn’t really cover it and he knew that Gibbs was right. But damn he didn’t really want to move either, to lose contact with Gibbs again, it was almost like a physical ache that thumped in time with his head. He let Gibbs help him up and then help him to his bedroom and grimaced as he realised just what Gibbs would be seeing. How stark and unlived in his apartment was, especially his bedroom. But there was nothing that he could do about it now and he didn’t really care.
Gibbs looked around and was shocked at the lack of decoration that was in the master bedroom. There was a large bed, complete with the quality high thread count linen which was expected. There was one night stand and that was all. The room was stark and so un-Tony like that Gibbs was a little taken aback by it. It was another reminder of just how much Tony had to have been hurting, even struggling while he was gone that he again found himself hating himself for what he had put Tony through, what he’d put them all through.
He stopped Tony and took a moment to pull the covers back on the bed for him before he eased him into bed. He got Tony settled then headed out to get a bottle of water before heading back.
“Here Tony, have a drink before you go to sleep.” Gibbs said as he sat on the edge of the bed next to Tony. He knew that he needed to get Tony to drink something after all the vomiting he’d just done.
“Thanks.”
Gibbs waited until Tony had finished drinking before he made a move. “Ducky should be here soon, I’ll go and wait for him in the lounge. You try and get some rest Tony.”
“No!” Tony sat up. As much as he’d been hurt by Gibbs actions, he could understand them. But he’d missed his lover while he’d been gone, and he’d tried to stay away from him when he’d come back in fear of being hurt again. But having him so close, being able to touch him, be held by him had been too much and he wasn’t strong enough to deny himself that comfort any longer. Not now that he knew that he could have it again. That Gibbs was here, really here. He was tired of being the strong one and just wanted Gibbs to stay with him. Talk to him. The rest they could work out later. “Stay. Please.”
Gibbs studied Tony for a moment before he’d moved to the other side of the bed and sat down and was pleased when Tony turned to him and reached out for him.
“I really should go and wait for Ducky, let him in.” Gibbs said as he started to gently card his fingers through Tony’s hair. Again he was struck by how right, how normal this felt and he wondered again how he could so totally forget this. Tony was one of the best things that had ever happened to him.
Tony shook his head. “He has a key and he usually just lets himself in.”
“He has a key?”
“Mmmm,” Tony murmured as he was soothed by the gentle rhythm of Gibbs fingers. “Seemed to be logical. Ducky’s been here a lot over the past couple of months, just seemed easier to give him a key in case of emergencies. Abbs has one as well.”
“Has it been bad? The morning sickness?” Gibbs asked after a couple of minutes. He’d noticed that Tony was starting to drift off, but he wanted to know.
“Hmm?” Tony asked making an effort to open his eyes and concentrate.
“Has the morning sickness been bad?” Gibbs asked again.
“Yeah.” Tony sighed. He knew that it was no use lying, that Gibbs would find out the truth. “The docs have me on some meds that help, but it’s still pretty rough.”
“I wish there was something I could do Tony.” Gibbs said softly.
Tony smiled. “It’s not so bad. Abby and Ducky have been there for me all the time. And Brad’s been great as well. Besides your here now.”
“And I’m not going anywhere.”
“Well that’s good to hear Jethro. But now tell me what has been going on.” Ducky said from the doorway.
He may still be annoyed at his old friend, but even he couldn’t deny how much better Tony was when Gibbs was around. They were good for each other, which was why he’d been pleased when they had first gotten together. He half wondered where Abby and Timothy were, they had said that they were going to spend the night at Tony’s.
“Hey Ducky, you didn’t need to come.” Tony said as he sat up and leant back against his headboard.
“Why don’t you let me be the judge of that.”
“He’s been vomiting Ducky, he says it’s not from the concussion but I wanted to be sure. It seemed a little excessive for morning sickness.”
“Ah, my dear boy.” Ducky set his bag down next to the bed. “You are still taking the medication that Brad prescribed I take it. The full does?”
“Yes Ducky.”
Ducky nodded and got his pen light out to check Tony’s reactions, making sure that the concussion wasn’t worse. Then he followed up with a couple of other checks just to make sure that nothing more serious was the problem before he nodded to himself.
“Duck?”
“Hmm?” He reached into his bag and retrieved a syringe and a vile of medicine to help ease Tony’s nausea.
“So?”
“Oh yes, sorry. You were right to call me Jethro. Though Tony was correct he was probably ill due to his morning sickness, however the concussion would not have helped. I dare say that the vomiting didn’t help with your headache any either did it my dear boy.”
“Not a lot.” Tony mumbled as he leaned against Gibbs.
“I’ll give you something to help ease the nausea and also the dull the headache a little, though I can’t give you to strong as you well know.” Ducky said as he prepared the syringe and then used the medical wipe to cleanse the injection area. “There this should help, you should start to feel better shortly. I would also suggest that you use your oxygen tonight.”
“Aww Ducky you know I hate it, the tube gets all tangled and it’s just plain annoying.”
Ducky chuckled. “You may hate it, but you’re body is taxed enough trying to heal itself and create a new life. I think it wise to ease a little of the strain in any way that we can. Don’t you?”
“But I’m breathing fine, not a wheeze in sight! And the irritation of the tube will just make my headache worse....”
“Tony,” Ducky said as he held out the nasal cannula, “do you want me to call Brad and have him come over?”
Tony sulked, held out his hand and snuggled closer to Gibbs all at the same time. He knew when he was fighting a losing battle. “Not fair Ducky.”
Gibbs was a little shocked. He had vague memories about Tony needing oxygen sometimes, after his run in with the plague his lungs just weren’t what they used to be. But he hadn’t thought that Tony had needed the extra help breathing for a while. To hear Tony and Ducky discussing it like it was an old argument was a big enough shock, to see the oxygen tanks set up and within easy reach of Tony’s bed was a bigger one. He wondered how he hadn’t noticed them earlier.
“That’s better.” He took a moment to gather his equipment together and safely store the used syringe and make sure that the oxygen was flowing before he looked at Gibbs and Tony again. “I thought that Abby and young Timothy were going to stay with you tonight?” He asked as he focused on his old friend.
“They were, but they got called back to work.” Tony said as he fiddled with the cannula trying to make it a little more comfortable. As bad as he’d been feeling he couldn’t help but feel content and he couldn’t stop himself from reaching out and touching Gibbs, reassuring himself that Gibbs was actually there with him and he wasn’t a figment of his imagination.
Ducky watched the interaction between Tony and Gibbs. He couldn’t help acknowledge that they were good for each other, balanced each other. He also found himself wondering if Gibbs had anything to do with the two younger peoples absence.
“It was nothing to do with me Duck.”
“Uh huh.” Ducky grunted, not really surprised that Gibbs had guessed what he had been thinking. He believed his old friend, so that left only one person who had the authority to recall any of them. He’d take this up with her later. He turned his attention back to a sleepy Tony. “Now my boy, you are not to be alone tonight. Just because I agree that this isn’t related to your concussion does not mean that you can ignore that fact that you have a concussion. I would be happy to stay and you company tonight.”
Tony looked over at Ducky and smiled. He was struck again by how lucky he was. Before coming to NCIS no one had cared this much about him. He knew that Ducky was watching out for him, trying to give him an out for being alone with Gibbs. But for the first time since Gibbs had returned he really didn’t want his lover, ex-lover, whatever, to leave.
“Thanks Ducky, but I think I’ll be fine.”
“I’ll be staying Duck.” Gibbs said at almost the same time.
“Now do try and get a little sleep my dear boy. I’ll stop by later and check on how you are doing.” Ducky said as he stood and made his way to the door. He had to admit, even though he was still annoyed with Gibbs, that Gibbs was better for Tony than any medication he could provide Tony with.
“Thanks Ducky.” Tony said as he sleep began to claim him.
Gibbs ran his hand through Tony’s hair, making sure that Tony was comfortable, then made his way to follow Ducky out. He still had a few questions for his old friend.
“Duck.”
Ducky turned and looked at his old friend. For the first time he noticed just how tired and stressed Gibbs seemed to be. Not that most people would noticed. It took him a little by surprise.
“Yes Jethro?”
“Ah,” Gibbs hesitated, looking back to the closed bedroom door. He knew that Ducky was still pissed at him. “Thanks Duck.”
Ducky just nodded and waited. He knew that that wasn’t why Gibbs had followed him out.
“How worried should I be Ducky? About Tony?” Gibbs asked almost hesitantly. He’d been doing some homework, not trusting his memory on something so important. But he didn’t know what the concussion would mean at the moment and the added complication of his scarred lungs.
Ducky sighed. “I’m sure you know a little about male pregnancy. I won’t lie to you Jethro, with Tony’s medical history and his line of work Tony’s in the high risk category. Which is exactly why Tony is taking no chances and has Brad, myself and Dr Morgan keeping a close eye on him. As well as the rest of his family. And as you have no doubt guessed from what you have witnessed tonight, his pregnancy has not been an easy one so far. But having said that Tony is doing extremely well. The concussion is a minor worry, but keep in mind he has had worse.”
“Dr Morgan?”
“His specialist. Highly respected in her field.”
Gibbs nodded. “Is there anything special I need to do or watch out for?”
“No, just do the usual concussion checks during the night. If you’re unsure of anything call me and I’ll come right away. The medication that I gave him should keep his nausea bearable until he takes his next dose in the morning. It should also help him sleep a little easier. Also make sure that he keeps the nasal cannula on, he has a tendency to take it off when he sleeps.”
“How bad has it been? The morning sickness, shouldn’t it be easing up about now?”
“Ah,” Ducky smiled sadly. “Unfortunately our Tony has been suffering from severe morning sickness, while most people will experience it at some stage during their pregnancy some suffer it more than others. Then there are the few who are unlucky to suffer it throughout their entire pregnancy. Unfortunately Tony seems to be one of the truly unlucky ones who will experience morning sickness all the way through his pregnancy. All we can do is help him as he needs it I’m afraid. He has his medications and his morning sickness survival kits which he has stashed around to help him, but even so at times they aren’t going to be enough. Also as the pregnancy progresses he may find he has trouble breathing, but with the help of some oxygen it shouldn’t cause too much of a problem.”
“He never does things the easy way.” Gibbs said as he wiped his hand over his face.
Ducky chuckled. “No, no he doesn’t. But then neither do you.”
Gibbs looked at Ducky, tried to read his expression and gave it up. When he wanted to be Ducky could be impossible to read.
“Now, go and take care of that dear boy in there. It is not often that we are given a second chance. Or even a third. Do not screw it up my friend.”
Gibbs nodded and then headed back to Tony’s room to check on him. Ducky’s message had been received loud and clear. Screw up again with Tony and there would be hell to pay. The more he learned about his family had coped while he was in Mexico, the worse he felt. He should never have run. It wasn’t him, never had been, and now all he could do was beg and plead for forgiveness from all of his family. Especially from Tony.
He detoured past the kitchen to grab another bottle of water before he went to check on Tony. He paused at the door and took a moment to pull himself together. He needed to be strong, to be willing to open himself up, to listen, but most of all to be there. Something he hadn’t been so good at since Shannon and Kelly had been killed. But he was willing to try now.
He opened the door and nearly dropped the bottle he was carrying when he saw Tony sitting on the edge of his bed, pulling the cannula off and about to get up.
“Tony you need to leave that on and lay down, try and get some rest.”
Tony hated to admit it but he’d been anxious when Gibbs had left him. He didn’t think that Gibbs was leaving, but then again he hadn’t expected his lover to run off to Mexico either. When he didn’t hear yelling or slamming doors he’d wanted to investigate, but he hadn’t gotten very far. Between his latest bout with the toilet, his concussion and whatever Ducky had just slipped him he was as weak as a kitten. And he hated it. Hated how vulnerable he felt. Hated how close to the surface his emotions were at the moment. Hated that after all his hard work, and how much Gibbs had hurt him he didn’t want him to leave again. Not now, not ever.
“Here, have a sip of this and then we’ll get you back into bed so you can get some sleep.” Gibbs said as he sat next to Tony. After so long apart he couldn’t stop the thrill he felt at being so close to Tony again.
“Thanks.” Tony lent against Gibbs, and felt himself relax as the smell of coffee and sawdust surrounded him. He wished that this moment could last, that he could forget all the pain of the past couple of months. That it was just him and Gibbs and everything was perfect.
Gibbs smiled, then eased himself up and helped Tony lay down and get settled again. He could see that Tony was tired, but fighting it. When he was satisfied that Tony was comfortable he lent down and gently kissed his forehead. He knew now that he had a chance, and that was all that he wanted.
“Get some sleep Tony. I’ll be out in the lounge if you need anything.”
Tony sat up suddenly as he felt Gibbs leaving. He reached out and grabbed his wrist. “No! Don’t go.”
“It’s all right Tony, I’m not going far.”
Gibbs tried to release his wrist from Tony’s grip without hurting him, but Tony was having none of it.
“No, please. Just stay here. Please.”
Gibbs looked at Tony, “You sure? I promise I’m not going to leave, I was just going to sleep on your couch.”
Tony shook his head. “Stay here. Please ‘Ro.”
Gibbs moved to the other side of the bed. “OK, but you have to promise to get some sleep Tony.”
Tony waited until Gibbs was settled down next to him before he reached out to touch him again. He needed the physical contact.
“I looked for you when you left you know.” Tony said quietly.
Gibbs moved so that he was facing Tony, he reached out and started to card his fingers through Tony’s hair, the way he remembered he liked it.
“I know.” Gibbs said softly, hoping that he could lull Tony to sleep. “I think I knew that you would search for me. I’m sorry that I left you alone Tony.”
“S’kay, I think I kind of understand why you left now.” Tony said as he snuggled closer.
That got Gibbs attention. “Huh?”
“I didn’t before, but I think I get it now. You’d just lost you family. I didn’t get that before, never really understood what family meant. Until now.”
Now Gibbs really was intrigued. “What do you mean Tony?”
“Family is important. Your family should be everything to you, and you lost yours. You were lost so you had to leave, to help find yourself. I get that now. I have a family now and I’d do anything to protect them.” Tony yawned. “Never had that before. Always wondered what I was missing.”
“Ah hell Tony.” Gibbs pulled Tony closer to him.
“S’kay, really.” Tony said, he was desperately trying to avoid falling asleep. “So you said you wanted to try and make it up to me. How are you planning on doing that.”
Gibbs smiled, he knew exactly what Tony was doing and why. But he also knew that if he kept gently carding his fingers through Tony’s hair and speaking softly to him he’d be asleep in no time. He decided to play along.
“Well I thought I’d start by trying to woo you Tony, maybe take you on a date.”
“Date sounds nice, but not sure I wanna go out.”
Gibbs chuckled at that. Typical Tony. “Okay, so how about a date. Tonight. Here.”
“Tonight?”
Gibbs nodded and lowered his voice a little more. He could tell that Tony was losing his battle and decided to start making some plans.
“Yep, tonight Tony. After you’ve gotten some sleep. I’ll cook for you and then we can watch a movie, your choice.” Gibbs stopped and checked to see if Tony was still awake, when he saw that he was, just barely, he continued. “And you can ask me anything you like Tony. No more secrets.”
Tony looked up into Gibbs eyes, and was surprised to see that Gibbs meant it. It was a humbling feeling.
“Anything?”
“About my personal life, yes. About my career, as long as it’s not classified. I’ll answer anything that I can, just remember there are still some holes up there.”
“Wow.”
Gibbs chuckled. It was good to know that he could still surprise Tony.
“Now go to sleep Tony. The sooner you sleep the sooner we can start our date.”
Tony closed his eyes and moved so that his head rested on Gibbs shoulder. The gentle fingers carding through his hair and the sound of Gibbs breathing and heart beat soon had him drifting off to sleep.
Gibbs couldn’t stop the smile that spread across his face. This was more than he’d hoped for. He had his chance and this time he wasn’t going to mess it up.
While he watched Tony sleep he started to plan their date.