hat mua nhac tam ten nguoi
i've been down and out of it lately. nothing's clicking right. i get like that from time to time. i hardly socialize, and exspect people to leave me the bloody hell alone. but after this weekend, i think i've finally cleared my head. today was one of those days. i walked around, attending classes with a mindless aim to get back into academics. i hadn't notice that people were talking to me, and just walked on by. i noticed that i selfishly take my anger and frustration out on people, just the way others do to me. yet i can't swallow my pride and forget about it. just think, if your sitting there waiting for something miraculous to happen, aren't you just waiting for disappointment? why not go out there and run after what you want? why get fixated with everything people say to you? keeping it all inside only hurts you, why put yourself down for the way people precieve you to be? HELL i say do what you have to do, and life will take it's course.
hello.goodbye
i cross by interesting people everyday. it's a moment of bliss. but when we say goodbye, it all turns sour, or so that's how i've been seeing it. i always wonder when the next time i'll get to see them again, have the privilge to enjoy their company. my natural state of mind when i meet someone who's compatible is...how long is this going to last before we go our separate ways, will this moment be a lasting memory for to me to reminice on years to come, or will i never get the chance to see this person again? what it wall comes down to is insecurity. there are times when i've enjoyed someone's company so much that i hold onto something that isn't really there. i ask myself silly questions like, am i good enough for this person, they're so perfect and i'm perfectly flawed. i only could hope that someday i'll see those lovely faces again, just a friendly hello is satisfying enough.
--we were talking on the phone late saturday night. he tells me i sounded like a man. aha way to bust my ego buddy!