Another new fic....
Title / Chapter: All I Really Want to Say… (01/05)
Author: amanda: jaclyn’s twin sister
Pairing: Taylor Hanson / OFC: Kaylee
Rating: G … there’s no swearing whatsoever
P.O.V.: First Person, OFC: Kaylee
Notes: Songfic
Dedication: To my hetfic girls because even hetfic can be purrrty ;)
Summary: Taylor lets Kaylee know he’s serious.
SONG CREDIT
Song: Dead Serious
Band: Tinted Windows
Album: Tinted Windows
ALL I REALLY WANT TO SAY…
I’ve never believed Taylor when he says he’d never leave me, not really anyway. It’s always back and forth with him. From me to Natalie and back again. I understand he’ll always love her, she’s the mother of his kids, but if he really loved me he wouldn’t keep going back. And I tell him that today…
* * * * *
“I love you,” Taylor says as we lounge on our bed.
I grit my teeth. It’s been getting harder and harder to hear him say those words. Harder for me to believe them. “If you really loved me you wouldn’t be with Natalie,” I whisper.
I feel Taylor tense, but he doesn’t say anything. I make a noise in my throat, almost like a snarl, and haul myself up on my elbow.
I glare at my live-in boyfriend. “See! Even you know it’s true!” I exclaim.
Taylor shakes his head. “It’s not true. I just don’t know what to say to you anymore. How can I make you believe me? How can I make it up to you?”
“You can’t,” I whisper.
Darling, when I say I would never leave you, Seems like you always say, “I don’t believe you.” I know it’s hard to take it to heart, After all this time but it’s time to start cause, I know you think I take it all for granted. That’s how it looks but not how I planned it. I can’t make up for words unsaid, But that’s not what’s been going on in my head.
Taylor turns his head away from me. I study his profile and watch as a tear slides from the corner of his eye. I bite my lip. I hate seeing him cry. He doesn’t do it often, always trying to be so strong, so when those blue eyes pool with tears it’s heartbreaking.
I touch his chin lightly and guide his face back towards me. “Don’t cry,” I whisper.
“Can’t help it,” he mutters crossing his arms over his chest and pouting.
I run my thumb over his lower lip. “It’s your choice,” I whisper. “Me or her.”
The singer’s jaw drops and he stares at me in shock.
“You did not just give me an ultimatum,” he says. I chew on the inside of my cheek and shrug. “You did, didn’t you?”
“I’m twenty-four. I want to get married someday,” I explain. Taylor opens his mouth to speak but I hold my hand up to stop him. “And I’m not going to settle for second best,” I tell him.
The blond frowns, his eyebrows forming a deep V. “You think you’re second best?” I look away, my eyes watering. “How can you think that?” he asks in a gentle voice.
“How can I not think that?” I reply. A beat of silence follows. Tears about to overflow, I look back to Taylor. “I get that nothing could make you stop loving the mother of your children but…” I shake my head, the tears spilling over.
Taylor reaches up and gently wipes the water from my face with the back of his fingers. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I never wanted you to feel that way.”
“Yeah, well, I do,” I retort. A wounded look comes over his face making me feel guilty, which just irritates me. He should be the one feeling guilty. “Don’t look at me that way,” I tell him. “You don’t get to be the one hurting. I’m the one whose boyfriend has been cheating on her for years and making babies with someone else.” My nostrils flare as the anger rises in me. “This is the last time we’re going to have this fight, Taylor. I’m not going to be taken for granted anymore.”
I get up, climbing off the bed and slip on some sneakers.
Taylor sits up, alarmed. “Where are you going?”
“For a walk,” I mutter and then exit the room without a backward glance.
& & &
Stay Tuned for Part 2!