It Just So Happens

[write_me_a_life]

It just so happens I wince every time I see you
and turn away from your image
dressed in jeans
ripped and stained
a tall frame dipped in blue.

The scent of my mother warns me away
keeps me safe in my room
but sometimes forgets
my window is open.

It so happens I don't always listen to my mother
and sometimes she notices this
but sometimes she realizes
there's nothing she can do to stop me.

And I'd feel lucky, were I able to run away
to Eugene where I left you behind
and sat in the drizzle
I was oblivious to the cold
because I was wearing your sweater.

I want to go back there
but bright sunny skies
have pushed the rainclouds from sight
and the desert is where I'm headed.

I don't want you to trap me
your lies binding me to you
when you conveniently decide
you want me near.

That's why I'm leaving your side
something I've tried to do
desperately tried
many times before.

And my father is wondering why
I keep smiling
I keep talking about you
I start talking about him.

There are starving hearts outside
waiting for someone to
give them sustenence.

I climb slowly away from you
climb towards a new life
climb towards a new love
climb towards myself.