happy new years i guess .. donno about the happy part ...

[wretched_sorrow]

well here we go...ahh plans ..dont ya love 'em, always fuckin up and shit. well i over slept today and i knew chad was gonna end up not going through with what he said so .. i didnt get to go to the liquor store.plan one down the drains hmm ok next we was suposta go to anthonys for new years and we had some shit planed well then all of a sidden

Comments

Re: part two

[quite_you]

Brandon Bear.... I don't want to lose you as my friend. I do love you, alot. And I never realized that it bothered you so much before to come and get me for us to hang out. If I knew it bothered you so much, I would have never asked. If I had my liscense, I would be more than happy to go see you, but I don't, so I can't. I'm just sorry for everything. I do know that I did ask you to come and get me yesterday... I know that I did. And as far as my parents, I do know that they wouldn't have gotten mad at you. Trust me on this, because I do know them better than you do. I'm really not in the mood for this though. I've lost everything I've ever cared about. I don't know what to think anymore either. I just can't wait until I'm 18... I'm gonna move away, and I'm not telling anyone where I'm going. I can't take this shit here. I need to get away.

I do love you Brandon. And you will always be my Brandon bear. I'm sorry if I messed anything up for you last night, or even any time before that. I know I tend to fuck things up quite nicely. I'm sorry.... for everything.

Love,
Tyra

Re: part two

[wretched_sorrow]

tyra i never said it bothered me to come get you. i didnt mean for it to sound that way i was just sayin its not like its something i havent done b4 or something i wont do. it was just everything lastnight . as far as i knew when we left the house we was going to go to town to find out what was goin on where chad was and so forth ... then that happend then tommy called and i found out chad wasnt around and i didnt know what was goin on or anything

i dont care to come get you and if u did asked it must have been wile nathan was handing me the phone or something b/c i never heard you ask and i would remember answering ... i donno it wasnt you that set back any of my plans it was the rest of my so called friends and trust me if i had known things was gonna just turn out like it did i would of came and got you. but i didnt know what was goin on and thought we had plans and u know i dont care to come get u 99% of the time and i have a problem tellin you no.

i was kinda depressed and mad at everything and i had like 10 things going through my mind .. so i didnt wanna talk to you at the time .. but yeah i just wanted you to know i do love you and we are still great frineds unless u deside otherwise. its gonna stay like that as far as im concerned ..

i dont have a problem comin to get you or antyhing iv never had a problem with it iv always been happy to get to hang out with u. i just brought that up b/c it felt like i was getting some much shit b/c of this one little thing and i was tryin to point out some of the nice things iv tryed to do. the way it was feeling was you was pissed off at me like the rest fo my friends lastnight ..but anyways im dont typing ima go do something i guess and get away from any human contact at all goodbye love you 2 ..

love
Brandon

Re: part two

[quite_you]

I wasn't pissed off at you, just disapointed and lonely. I've been going thru alot lately, and I just wanted to be with someone. It hurt last night, because I felt like you didn't want to spend time with me and it left me feeling like I had done something wrong. And you didn't have to point out the things that you have done good, because I know of all the great things you have done. You are a great person, and we will always be friends, and I'm pretty sure I will never decide other wise.

I wish we could just forget all of this. I really don't want to cry over this anymore. I have so many things going on... and I don't really feel like hanging on anymore.

Love,
Tyra

Re: part two

[wretched_sorrow]

i didnt mean for you to feel that way i donno lately everythings falling apart. my friendships with all of my friends have been on rocky terms for months and the start of the new year just went to hell. i think im just goin to try to stop talkin to anyone for a wile as nathan said in his journal entry b4 about people being gone and jsut coming back form the dead or crawl under a rock for a wile. im tired of everything lately and even if im around some people im still lonely. so i mite as wells b alone a wile clear my head and forget everything and come back when the dust settles and see where my place is and where my friendships lye .... this will b my last post for a wile im done sic fo this journal already so many problems and so many arguments good bye i love you and all of my frineds i wish u all the best for the new year farewell

Re: part two

[quite_you]

Will you still talk to me... even though you don't really want to talk to anyone? I never get to talk to anyone anymore. The only people I talk to are you, Nathan, and Ashley.... that's it. I get really lonely, and I can't take it anymore. I love you Brandon Bear.

Re: part two

[wretched_sorrow]

i love you to tyra and yes i wanna talk to you. mayb we will i donno what to do as of now it seems best to me to get away from some stuff for a wile and figure some things out. i want this year to b different i want to b happy at least some of this year. i dont mean the kinda happy thats like once in a wile i mean where nothing can both you b/c your just so happy and everything is good ... im tired of being alone and alot of stuff needs to change .. i donno i keep sitting here thinking wheres my life going another year done went by and im stuck in the hell hole i swore id get out of and theres nothing for me here no love a few friends is all i can get from this place. its a good thing i have what i do but some times friends just dont make up for that part of your life .. and your soul thats missing ... i donno so much stuff is weighing down on me at this very moment i just want to excape and b free for once in my life ... i love you to tyra and im sure we will talk ur always welcome to call me .. and mayb we can hang out some time goodnight tho

Re: part two

[quite_you]

Oddly enough...I know exactly how you feel.