Suicide Philosophy: part II

[wraithwitch]

Caveat: I am very interested in the opinions people (including myself) hold and why. I am especially interested in testing the logic/reasoning of those opinions and seeing if they hold up. That kinda thing fascinates me. As such, if any of this comes across as especially pokey or heartless, it's not supposed to, but it is (hopefully) meant to

Comments

[annwfyn]

Suicide is different. Very different. I don't quite know why, but I know it is. I've lost people I loved - I watched my mother die, very slowly and very painfully from cancer. I watched my best friend's family fall apart when her younger sister died very suddenly from meningitis. I've also been in the proximity of a suicide and it's totally and utterly different.

I think it's because most deaths hurt, but leave you with the memories of the loved on. I miss my mum on a daily basis, but what I have which keeps me going is the knowledge that she loved me, that our time together was good - imperfect but good - and that sometimes these things happen. I think what's especially cruel about suicide is that it takes away that main and fundemental coping mechanism. Your memories of your loved one are tainted. It isn't just something that happened - it's something someone chose to do, something you couldn't stop, something you can blame yourself for.

Re: finding the body - honestly - I can't think of a way in which the suicide can't mess with the person who has to deal with the body. The train driver one is especially bad, but there's no method which won't screw someone in the head quite badly. When I was quite seriously considering it I decided that the only reasonable way to do it was to drive my car into a brick wall at high speed, thus making it look like an accident. Sadly, I wrote off that method as rather risky and more likely to leave me paralysed, more miserable than before and definitely a burden on my family. I don't know of any reliable suicide method which isn't nasty, selfish and really unfair on others.

I think suicide is different to other forms of death. It's quite possible that's to do with society's attitude towards it, but the fact remains, it still is. And in the absence of being able to change the world, I still think it's the most responsible thing to do to not destroy the mental health of those around you in response to your (generic you, not specific you) own mental health problems.

[duana]

But is it fair to ask/expect someone to live in pain to save others from suffering? And is the pain of losing someone to suicide worse than watching them be miserable and tormented for years? I watched a documentary about people who had jumped from the golden gate bridge and several of the families/friends said that although they were obviously devastated, they understood why they had done it and respected their choice. They all seemed to feel that a person who had been suffering was now at peace. That's how people often feel when someone with a terminal illness dies, so why should it be different if the suffering is mental rather than physical?