don't read this entry
it has been over a week and i am just now getting over my depression. I miss europe and the fact that i have to work for everything, trying to speak the languages, trying to budget, and trying to find where things are. There was really very little for me to come back to in miami. My close friends are either 1) vacationing 2) in deep shit and 3) live far away. Also i don't start my job for awhile so i have nothing to do and no money. My family (hahahah) is falling apart and my dad went on a trip to North Carolina with his girlfriend (still married) for a week and i am living in guilt because of his shit. Also the guy i thought i was going to date made out with a friend a few days after i left and then didn't tell me til i asked him, thus ruining the trust and respect i was hoping to establish with the "you can kiss other girls but just tell me" deal so i had to get rid of him. I miss being able to call someone up when i am stressed and hear the "shhhh baby is is ok" or just calling him and saying i love you. I have grown alot over the month and feel like i am ready for a relationship that will last. I don't get pissy for no reason now, i am not a jealous, and i have rectified most of my weakness and swallowed my pride. I am ready to fall in love.