Help.
So I have no idea what to do in the upcoming few days. Here's some background.
Myself and rl friends took a server transfer back in the big bunch of server transfers after Wrath dropped. We started up a guild on our new server, managed to recruit in another smallish guild and we had 10 man raiding. This lasted till the summer of 2009 when people went missing and raids kept getting dropped.. normal summertime issues. However, after a couple months of this, things got shook up when instead of waiting the couple weeks we had left until the students who'd disappeared came back from the summer, the guild leader and the raid leader decided to go form another guild with other friends and some who were left followed. This left me a bit heartbroken, cause they did this without talking to me, my husband or another close friend.. the 5 of us had formed the guild together, we're all real life friends. In fact, my husband and I were on vacation at Blizzcon when it happened and they didn't even tell us they were doing it when we checked in.. we just came back from vacations to find their mains gone. I tried following them over, but I was so betrayed and hurt feeling, I left after a couple weeks. It didn't help that they didn't have any use for my character/spec cause they already had someone exactly the same that they'd left to join up with... and I was the one expected to change. They set raid nights my husband couldn't make. It felt hurtful. Said guild leader also kept her alts as GM and her husband's alts as officers in the old guild.
So I hunted around ad discovered no one wanted my character in it's spec. Our little guild had just been starting Ulduar when ToC came out so I was so far behind. I managed to find a guild that would take me. Another friend was in it. But they wanted me to change my spec. So I did. I wanted to raid 25 man with them. Eventually though, I discovered I really disliked said spec. It didn't help that it was moonkin before they buffed them. I did crappy dps in ToC with them as I tried to upgrade. I was so far behind them. They kept wanting to do TOGC and I barely had regular TOC gear. But I faithfully went. When ICC came out, I had about half to three quarters caught up. And I went into ICC and struggled. I got yelled at for dismal dps. Gear and moonkin were crappy. I was told I'd be sat from raids if I didn't get better. So I sat myself. I was so angry. Then they buffed moonkin and I went back in with them. I did way better. But we'd lost our feral and I thought it was a chance to go back. One officer agreed and I proceeded to up my feral set (I'd been working on it anyways, it was my offspec). My first night in the new spec geared, I was told I was undergeared (according to wowheroes, I wasn't) by a different officer. Turns out said officer's boyfriend wanted to switch to feral. And she didn't want me competing. I got upset. I got told I was overreacting, which made me more upset. I stopped going to raids.
During this time, my husband just.. did nothing really. He moped and sort of festered his anger at what happened. He got mad at trying to raid. His job went evenings, so he only had weekends to play.
I turned to playing an alt.. got it okay geared.. then ended up switching factions with it to try out a guild on the other faction on my server. Things didn't work out. Probably my fault. I took exception to some stuff that happened.. I admit I probably blew it out of proportion but I faction changed back cause I missed playing with my husband anyways. My neglected main was still sitting in the other guild.
Then, my husband faction and server changed. Him and his friends were going to do weekend raiding. It was perfect for him. I took the opportunity to take my druid main and go with him. It was awesome. I made friends, I played with other rl friends of my husband. We had a great time. Sure, we had some occasions where people didn't show up on time etc.. but we were enjoying ourselves. We were 10 man raiding ICC. The summer of 2010 was pretty awesome. It lasted the length of the summer, then my husband and 2 of his friends, our main tank was one of them.. they decided they didn't want to bother playing anymore. His friends stopped playing, though they're still in the guild. My husband faction changed and transfered back to the old server. I was devastated again, but since I'd followed him to play with him, I followed him back.
During all this, the ex guildmaster and raid leader's new guild had failed.. and they joined the one I had been in. And it failed. So now they were just in the old guild of ours that they'd abandoned but kept at their "backup" while screwing the rest of us over. My alts were all in there too.
So I came back to them guildless and so forth. I attempted to see about restarting us up, they weren't interested. I found yet another guild that would take me. They wanted a moonkin. Since I had kept up my moonkin spec gear.. I was all.. ok. Turns out though, they were WAY ahead of me. Working hardmodes icc25. That didn't matter, they needed a second moonkin for hardmode Saurfang, their other one had disappeared. So I went back to raiding. with them. Feeling crappy cause I wasn't keeping up in my 251s to all their 277s. But atleast I felt useful at saurfang. My husband was working evenings. But then when 4.0 dropped, my guild stopped raiding regularly and just started pugging. I've gone on a few, but I know it won't be the same in Cata. I played my alt priest on the other faction server that I still had, they weren't upset at me for leaving they understood. They even invited me to bring my priest with them on ICC10.
Also turns out exguildleader and raid leader have started another raid guild for 10 mans with other people. But if you add me to their roster, they have 9 raiders. And one druid in there already jealous, which is why I wasn't invited to form it with them even though they knew I'd help out. But I could maybe play something else, I'm told.
I've spent the last month until the shattering just sort of ghosting around cause I can't make a decision.
Do I want to play on the other faction server where I'd had an awesome time and they've told me I have a spot no matter what I want to play? Do I stay in the hardmode progressed guild with my main where when Cat comes back, they have too many druids (said replacement moonkin is coming back and he's an officer. 3 moonkin, 2 officers, me member? I'm out. - they have enough feral and too many trees), but I can maybe have a spot.. once in a while?
Do I want to go play in the new guild that my rl friends/exguildmaster/raid leader have formed? I have an invite but I'm not really gonna be allowed to play my main in their raids. Not that I can tell atleast.
Add in the fact that last night, my husband faction transferred and server transferred ALL of his characters over to the other faction server. He and his 2 friends have decided they all want to play together in Cataclysm. They're all on the same sort of schedule so they all want to raid together there. He's left one character behind on what was our current server. And that's cause it was under level 10. I feel sort of left in the middle with it. I could do the same. Take all my characters that I want to keep to the other faction server and play. Possibly enjoy myself with them. Until the next time they decide to drop me. I mean, he did it before several months ago.
I feel no win. I think my heart wants to take my characters to the other faction server. But yeah... when are the three of them gonna leave me again? It's gonna be expensive moving all my characters. And staying on this server feels like it means I'll be benched in one guild or not totally welcome in the other.
So I've been ghosting around since the shattering, playing new alts with the new race/class combos, and being unable to make a decision about what to do. But I feel like my husband has forced me to make up my mind on what I'm gonna do next tuesday at 1ish in the morning when I get home with my copy of Cata and install it..
God, this was long. I hope people made it through it.. cause I could really use some advice. Has anyone else ever been in this sort of situation? Or maybe just.. eyes that aren't mine could help me sort through.
I thought I'd come back and edit this for you guys.
I chose the faction change and server tranfer. But NOT because of my husband. Because when I talked to the guild, they were so excited to have me back that the one officer sat in vent with me for a good 45 minutes talking about cataclysm and raid plans - and it sort felt like an interview at times when they asked me my plans and so forth... and I felt so happy and welcome - they wanted me as how I wanted to be. My favorite spec, but if I wanted to change characters, whatever they'd roll with it, yadda.. I was over the moon last night. I went through my characters and picked out the ones I absolutely must have (we all have those, don't we) and ran up the visa bill to be somewhere I'd be appreciated and happy. It's now just a plus that my husband and I are on the same server. I left characters behind on the other server so that if the friendship with the exgm and raid leader is repaired I do have someone to explore alliance side with them since my main is now horde. The guild I was in, I didn't say anything to though. I'm a little scared about what to say or if I should. A few hours last night in the new/old guild had me happier than I'd been in weeks/months in the guild I had left behind. So yeah. Thanks ladies. I decided this with a look on my own, and got lucky in that they wanted me, my spec and so forth :)
Myself and rl friends took a server transfer back in the big bunch of server transfers after Wrath dropped. We started up a guild on our new server, managed to recruit in another smallish guild and we had 10 man raiding. This lasted till the summer of 2009 when people went missing and raids kept getting dropped.. normal summertime issues. However, after a couple months of this, things got shook up when instead of waiting the couple weeks we had left until the students who'd disappeared came back from the summer, the guild leader and the raid leader decided to go form another guild with other friends and some who were left followed. This left me a bit heartbroken, cause they did this without talking to me, my husband or another close friend.. the 5 of us had formed the guild together, we're all real life friends. In fact, my husband and I were on vacation at Blizzcon when it happened and they didn't even tell us they were doing it when we checked in.. we just came back from vacations to find their mains gone. I tried following them over, but I was so betrayed and hurt feeling, I left after a couple weeks. It didn't help that they didn't have any use for my character/spec cause they already had someone exactly the same that they'd left to join up with... and I was the one expected to change. They set raid nights my husband couldn't make. It felt hurtful. Said guild leader also kept her alts as GM and her husband's alts as officers in the old guild.
So I hunted around ad discovered no one wanted my character in it's spec. Our little guild had just been starting Ulduar when ToC came out so I was so far behind. I managed to find a guild that would take me. Another friend was in it. But they wanted me to change my spec. So I did. I wanted to raid 25 man with them. Eventually though, I discovered I really disliked said spec. It didn't help that it was moonkin before they buffed them. I did crappy dps in ToC with them as I tried to upgrade. I was so far behind them. They kept wanting to do TOGC and I barely had regular TOC gear. But I faithfully went. When ICC came out, I had about half to three quarters caught up. And I went into ICC and struggled. I got yelled at for dismal dps. Gear and moonkin were crappy. I was told I'd be sat from raids if I didn't get better. So I sat myself. I was so angry. Then they buffed moonkin and I went back in with them. I did way better. But we'd lost our feral and I thought it was a chance to go back. One officer agreed and I proceeded to up my feral set (I'd been working on it anyways, it was my offspec). My first night in the new spec geared, I was told I was undergeared (according to wowheroes, I wasn't) by a different officer. Turns out said officer's boyfriend wanted to switch to feral. And she didn't want me competing. I got upset. I got told I was overreacting, which made me more upset. I stopped going to raids.
During this time, my husband just.. did nothing really. He moped and sort of festered his anger at what happened. He got mad at trying to raid. His job went evenings, so he only had weekends to play.
I turned to playing an alt.. got it okay geared.. then ended up switching factions with it to try out a guild on the other faction on my server. Things didn't work out. Probably my fault. I took exception to some stuff that happened.. I admit I probably blew it out of proportion but I faction changed back cause I missed playing with my husband anyways. My neglected main was still sitting in the other guild.
Then, my husband faction and server changed. Him and his friends were going to do weekend raiding. It was perfect for him. I took the opportunity to take my druid main and go with him. It was awesome. I made friends, I played with other rl friends of my husband. We had a great time. Sure, we had some occasions where people didn't show up on time etc.. but we were enjoying ourselves. We were 10 man raiding ICC. The summer of 2010 was pretty awesome. It lasted the length of the summer, then my husband and 2 of his friends, our main tank was one of them.. they decided they didn't want to bother playing anymore. His friends stopped playing, though they're still in the guild. My husband faction changed and transfered back to the old server. I was devastated again, but since I'd followed him to play with him, I followed him back.
During all this, the ex guildmaster and raid leader's new guild had failed.. and they joined the one I had been in. And it failed. So now they were just in the old guild of ours that they'd abandoned but kept at their "backup" while screwing the rest of us over. My alts were all in there too.
So I came back to them guildless and so forth. I attempted to see about restarting us up, they weren't interested. I found yet another guild that would take me. They wanted a moonkin. Since I had kept up my moonkin spec gear.. I was all.. ok. Turns out though, they were WAY ahead of me. Working hardmodes icc25. That didn't matter, they needed a second moonkin for hardmode Saurfang, their other one had disappeared. So I went back to raiding. with them. Feeling crappy cause I wasn't keeping up in my 251s to all their 277s. But atleast I felt useful at saurfang. My husband was working evenings. But then when 4.0 dropped, my guild stopped raiding regularly and just started pugging. I've gone on a few, but I know it won't be the same in Cata. I played my alt priest on the other faction server that I still had, they weren't upset at me for leaving they understood. They even invited me to bring my priest with them on ICC10.
Also turns out exguildleader and raid leader have started another raid guild for 10 mans with other people. But if you add me to their roster, they have 9 raiders. And one druid in there already jealous, which is why I wasn't invited to form it with them even though they knew I'd help out. But I could maybe play something else, I'm told.
I've spent the last month until the shattering just sort of ghosting around cause I can't make a decision.
Do I want to play on the other faction server where I'd had an awesome time and they've told me I have a spot no matter what I want to play? Do I stay in the hardmode progressed guild with my main where when Cat comes back, they have too many druids (said replacement moonkin is coming back and he's an officer. 3 moonkin, 2 officers, me member? I'm out. - they have enough feral and too many trees), but I can maybe have a spot.. once in a while?
Do I want to go play in the new guild that my rl friends/exguildmaster/raid leader have formed? I have an invite but I'm not really gonna be allowed to play my main in their raids. Not that I can tell atleast.
Add in the fact that last night, my husband faction transferred and server transferred ALL of his characters over to the other faction server. He and his 2 friends have decided they all want to play together in Cataclysm. They're all on the same sort of schedule so they all want to raid together there. He's left one character behind on what was our current server. And that's cause it was under level 10. I feel sort of left in the middle with it. I could do the same. Take all my characters that I want to keep to the other faction server and play. Possibly enjoy myself with them. Until the next time they decide to drop me. I mean, he did it before several months ago.
I feel no win. I think my heart wants to take my characters to the other faction server. But yeah... when are the three of them gonna leave me again? It's gonna be expensive moving all my characters. And staying on this server feels like it means I'll be benched in one guild or not totally welcome in the other.
So I've been ghosting around since the shattering, playing new alts with the new race/class combos, and being unable to make a decision about what to do. But I feel like my husband has forced me to make up my mind on what I'm gonna do next tuesday at 1ish in the morning when I get home with my copy of Cata and install it..
God, this was long. I hope people made it through it.. cause I could really use some advice. Has anyone else ever been in this sort of situation? Or maybe just.. eyes that aren't mine could help me sort through.
I thought I'd come back and edit this for you guys.
I chose the faction change and server tranfer. But NOT because of my husband. Because when I talked to the guild, they were so excited to have me back that the one officer sat in vent with me for a good 45 minutes talking about cataclysm and raid plans - and it sort felt like an interview at times when they asked me my plans and so forth... and I felt so happy and welcome - they wanted me as how I wanted to be. My favorite spec, but if I wanted to change characters, whatever they'd roll with it, yadda.. I was over the moon last night. I went through my characters and picked out the ones I absolutely must have (we all have those, don't we) and ran up the visa bill to be somewhere I'd be appreciated and happy. It's now just a plus that my husband and I are on the same server. I left characters behind on the other server so that if the friendship with the exgm and raid leader is repaired I do have someone to explore alliance side with them since my main is now horde. The guild I was in, I didn't say anything to though. I'm a little scared about what to say or if I should. A few hours last night in the new/old guild had me happier than I'd been in weeks/months in the guild I had left behind. So yeah. Thanks ladies. I decided this with a look on my own, and got lucky in that they wanted me, my spec and so forth :)