Too Much Information
So in Dr. M's campaign to figure out what is wrong with me, I get to take more tests. These tests are smarter than the other tests, which apparently means I get to take a laxative! So yesterday I get up at 6 in the morning to take this stuff (because it is supposed to "work" in 2-4 hours and I had to leave for work at 10... if you see my logic) but the amount she told me to take is the amount the bottle says you should take if you are a baby or something. I figure I'm not a baby, but I'm also not constipated, so maybe it'll balance out, you know? So I am reading my Bible and praying for awhile, and then I fall asleep and have the WORST DREAM EVER!!! But first...
At our old apartment one time, Amanda's brothers were staying with us and they had rented this ridiculous "horror" movie called Monsturd about a turd-monster. Like, it was seriously a giant poop that terrorized people or something. OK, back to story...
I dreamt that I was taking the test, but the poo kept growing and then it was sort of moving and I was like Hmm, It Seems To Be Alive. And then it was definitely moving and definitely alive and I guess I left, and when I came back it had multiplied into two of them and they were almost human-sized, really more like giant worms than poo at this point, and I tried to flush them but they were too big and it was freaky. And then they kept morphing and changing colors and I don't know how to explain the horror of this but they were kind of doing a taunting dance at me, maybe they were chasing me, and at one point one of them looked like it had half a human scull coming out of it somehow.
When I woke up, it was about time for the fun to begin. Lucky for me it didn't, because it seriously took me a good couple hours to stop being freaked out and see the humor in the fact that I HAD A NIGHTMARE ABOUT MONSTURD. Anyway, this is pretty much the meanest thing my subconscious has ever done to me, scaring me with poo immediately after I took a laxative. It must be under Adolf's influence.
So I guess I'll have to up the dosage for my next attempt. I'll have to remember to stay awake this time.
At our old apartment one time, Amanda's brothers were staying with us and they had rented this ridiculous "horror" movie called Monsturd about a turd-monster. Like, it was seriously a giant poop that terrorized people or something. OK, back to story...
I dreamt that I was taking the test, but the poo kept growing and then it was sort of moving and I was like Hmm, It Seems To Be Alive. And then it was definitely moving and definitely alive and I guess I left, and when I came back it had multiplied into two of them and they were almost human-sized, really more like giant worms than poo at this point, and I tried to flush them but they were too big and it was freaky. And then they kept morphing and changing colors and I don't know how to explain the horror of this but they were kind of doing a taunting dance at me, maybe they were chasing me, and at one point one of them looked like it had half a human scull coming out of it somehow.
When I woke up, it was about time for the fun to begin. Lucky for me it didn't, because it seriously took me a good couple hours to stop being freaked out and see the humor in the fact that I HAD A NIGHTMARE ABOUT MONSTURD. Anyway, this is pretty much the meanest thing my subconscious has ever done to me, scaring me with poo immediately after I took a laxative. It must be under Adolf's influence.
So I guess I'll have to up the dosage for my next attempt. I'll have to remember to stay awake this time.