im so incredibly happy
so obviously im home from france now. its been like 4 days. but it seems so much longer. it was so hard to leave, and im not sure i would have been able to if it werent for what we decided we were going to do long term.
it was hands down the best month of my entire life. i remember all of it so well its like it was just yesterday. the last night i was there we stayed at a hotel so we could get to the airport early the next morning. and that was such a perfect day. jumping on the beds and running around everywhere, eating chocolate and watching tv in our huge room. but it was still hard, i kept looking at the clock counting how many hours we had left. eventually we couldnt avoid it and we cried, i hated the thought of leaving him. i had been racking my brain trying to come up with any possible solution that would make it possible for us to be together longterm, and soon. and then it clicked, we had to go to california. he didnt really want to stay in france, there's no place really for us in oregon. and in california we could get jobs easily, we have a place to live, school is cheap, and i want to be near joey. everything fit. so i asked him if he would do it, and he said of course. omg, we discussed everything, even though i knew i was leaving soon i was incredibly happy. to talk about the future, one that wasnt out of our reach. so all i had to do was talk to my parents, i didnt think that was going to be a problem. i know we've obviously had our differences. but mom told me she would help guillaume and me get on our feet if we needed help. plus, i know they'd love to have us nearby instead of the otherside of the world.
so we were really happy up until it came time to go. for some reason i got really sick and was trying so hard just not to throw up, i think i was just really upset. i kept trying to convince myself i should stay, but i knew i couldnt do that. so it took everything i had to leave him. that was the saddest day of my life by far. but at least i knew it wasnt the last time, or even that it would be a long time.
so i got home after about 21 hours of flying, and he told me he'd found out that he could get his passport in 10 days. and i had already talked to my mom. she said she'd have to talk to my dad, but that she wasnt going to say no. there would be rules of course, and we'd have to get married if we were to live in the same room. i knew she'd say that, and i respected it. but i had to tell guillaume that. so i told him all of what she said except that part, i was trying to find a way. but then he was telling me that he looked into how to get a visa, even just for 1 or 2 years. and that it was really really hard, that you either had to be going to school, have a job there, or have family. which our situation falls into none of those catagories, unless of course i was family. so he said lets get married. which is what we were both thinking anyways. so i told him what my mom said. and that was it, we decided. we love each other soooo much, and we planned on getting married anyways. why not do it now. then he can stay with me permanently starting right away. i was so excited, i told him that my mom told me she'd already picked the spot she wanted us to get married at, on Balboa Pier. he was so flattered that she was thinking about it already, and i told him i had picked my dress months ago. hahaha, he loves it. then he looked at tuxes. :) it makes me so happy, this is really happening to me. its perfect. and since then we've discussed alot of little details about the wedding. but even if we were married with just the justice of the peace and witnesses i would be as happy as i am now. we even talked about kids. haha, gypsyyy is the name of our first dog. :D he has the money for his ticket now, all i have to do is go back home. im sooo thrilled.
so now its only a matter of time. a SHORT time at that. and that makes me happier than ive ever been.
i know alot of people are going to say that this is a stupid thing to do, and are going to tell me its wrong and i dont know what im doing. but i know very well what im doing. and if i thought that it was wrong i wouldnt be doing it, wouldnt have taken it as far as it is. and i know better than anyone else what is good and right for me. so i appreciate their concern, but i would rather not hear anything negative to spoil my joy since i will not be changing my mind anyways.
soooo i love you guillaume darling. and im so happy about all of this. thank you sooooo incredibly much. I LOVE YOU ENTIRELY. ♥ ♥ ♥
jessy
it was hands down the best month of my entire life. i remember all of it so well its like it was just yesterday. the last night i was there we stayed at a hotel so we could get to the airport early the next morning. and that was such a perfect day. jumping on the beds and running around everywhere, eating chocolate and watching tv in our huge room. but it was still hard, i kept looking at the clock counting how many hours we had left. eventually we couldnt avoid it and we cried, i hated the thought of leaving him. i had been racking my brain trying to come up with any possible solution that would make it possible for us to be together longterm, and soon. and then it clicked, we had to go to california. he didnt really want to stay in france, there's no place really for us in oregon. and in california we could get jobs easily, we have a place to live, school is cheap, and i want to be near joey. everything fit. so i asked him if he would do it, and he said of course. omg, we discussed everything, even though i knew i was leaving soon i was incredibly happy. to talk about the future, one that wasnt out of our reach. so all i had to do was talk to my parents, i didnt think that was going to be a problem. i know we've obviously had our differences. but mom told me she would help guillaume and me get on our feet if we needed help. plus, i know they'd love to have us nearby instead of the otherside of the world.
so we were really happy up until it came time to go. for some reason i got really sick and was trying so hard just not to throw up, i think i was just really upset. i kept trying to convince myself i should stay, but i knew i couldnt do that. so it took everything i had to leave him. that was the saddest day of my life by far. but at least i knew it wasnt the last time, or even that it would be a long time.
so i got home after about 21 hours of flying, and he told me he'd found out that he could get his passport in 10 days. and i had already talked to my mom. she said she'd have to talk to my dad, but that she wasnt going to say no. there would be rules of course, and we'd have to get married if we were to live in the same room. i knew she'd say that, and i respected it. but i had to tell guillaume that. so i told him all of what she said except that part, i was trying to find a way. but then he was telling me that he looked into how to get a visa, even just for 1 or 2 years. and that it was really really hard, that you either had to be going to school, have a job there, or have family. which our situation falls into none of those catagories, unless of course i was family. so he said lets get married. which is what we were both thinking anyways. so i told him what my mom said. and that was it, we decided. we love each other soooo much, and we planned on getting married anyways. why not do it now. then he can stay with me permanently starting right away. i was so excited, i told him that my mom told me she'd already picked the spot she wanted us to get married at, on Balboa Pier. he was so flattered that she was thinking about it already, and i told him i had picked my dress months ago. hahaha, he loves it. then he looked at tuxes. :) it makes me so happy, this is really happening to me. its perfect. and since then we've discussed alot of little details about the wedding. but even if we were married with just the justice of the peace and witnesses i would be as happy as i am now. we even talked about kids. haha, gypsyyy is the name of our first dog. :D he has the money for his ticket now, all i have to do is go back home. im sooo thrilled.
so now its only a matter of time. a SHORT time at that. and that makes me happier than ive ever been.
i know alot of people are going to say that this is a stupid thing to do, and are going to tell me its wrong and i dont know what im doing. but i know very well what im doing. and if i thought that it was wrong i wouldnt be doing it, wouldnt have taken it as far as it is. and i know better than anyone else what is good and right for me. so i appreciate their concern, but i would rather not hear anything negative to spoil my joy since i will not be changing my mind anyways.
soooo i love you guillaume darling. and im so happy about all of this. thank you sooooo incredibly much. I LOVE YOU ENTIRELY. ♥ ♥ ♥
jessy