Being, being.
So now that my daily commute is one hour each way, and my supervisor asked me if I was interested in becoming the Call Center Manager (with what ends up being a three year commitment to the job), and my former dog is now living with a new owner in the same new town as me, and my two black cats are now meeting the third black cat I rescued in the fall, and my mother is planning to move back to Virginia, and my best friend is graduating from grad school and about to become a nationally reknown consultant and my other best friend is about to move to Hollywood to become a rockstar screenwriter...
I wonder what will become of me? Rather, I wonder what I will make of all that is? Right now, tonight, I want only to rest. I want a respite from the flurry of movement, transition, adjustment, readjustment, and movement again. I want to simply be a being, being.
That's not in the cards, at least not for any sustained period. And truthfully, that is just fine with me. I'm ready for the work ahead, and I've been on this path for a while now. One foot in front of the other, even though I don't know quite where the path is heading. I'm not at a point where I can really rest just yet, and I'm commited enough to my process to accept this as simple fact.
In related news, my horoscope this month has me feeling a bit edgy. Mercury retrograde is never much fun; add to that some additional challenging planetary movement right around my birthday, and you have an uncomfortable triple Pisces. I'd like to be free of relationship challenges for a while, and still it seems there's more in store. I'm keeping my eyes and ears open, and my heart open as well. I don't want to be on vigilant alert for the worst thing in people (myself included), and I also know that I will recognize what's not right for me when I see it...and hold myself responsible for taking action when needed. Still, I want my relationships--romantic, familial, professional, all of them!--to be free from provokation and upset. So, we'll see what comes from the sky this month, and act in accordance with my highest values. Meanwhile, I'm going to invest the best that I have in those people and issues that matter most to me, and hold out for the best possible outcomes. I do wonder, however, if the job situation (and all the relationships there that would be affected by my decision) is the real backdrop for the relationship complications? Or, god forbid, my ile?
What will I think of this period in my life three months from now? Three years from now? I do wonder...
