Kind of Sort of Confused...RANT warning.
Okay. I keep going back and fourth on whether or not I want kids one day. I am not sure. I mean the world is a VERY bad place to live in, but some people like it here. And it would be cool to nurture and raise someone and teach them what I know. It would be cool to be able to support someone and have them look up to me and make sure they get to school and spend time with them and play games with them and train their mind....I don't know. I doubt I would be a good parent at all. What if they hated life like I do sometimes? Then it would be my fault for bringing them here. No, I can not support a child right now and I don't even have anyone to have it with...And I really am wanting to be with a woman right now. I mean maybe I will find a man, but right now I am kind of looking for a girl. And it is just kind of frustrating. I want a family (I have one---a mom, dad and sister, ect)...but I want to create a nice family...in order to do that me and my partner have to be completely in love. Maybe I could find a girl and she could have a child with a guy and I could raise the child with the girl I am with and the guy SHE had the kid with. Then I could still take care of the kid, but it wouldn't be my fault if the child hated life. Since I am bisexual, I COULD be with a guy and have my tubes tied and we could ADOPT a baby or kid, but I am not sure if he would want to or not...and sex with men...it is great, but it isn't sometihng I absolutely adore. I mean I love sex so much. It is just I want it to actually MEAN sometihng. I have had so much meaningless sex and it is getting kind of old. Yes, at least it is something and at least I get to feel some sort of connection and at least I gewt a certain amount of pleasure...but it isn't something that I can have steadily...Like I don't have a committed realtionship where we are together NO MATTER WHAT!!
Alright guess that is all for now. Kind of ranted.
Alright guess that is all for now. Kind of ranted.