[exo] you deserve better
Title: You Deserve Better
Pairing: SeHun / LuHan
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,429
Summary: How many times do I have to tell you, he’s not the one . You’re too good for a guy like that. You’re too beautiful to be crying every day. You need to be loved, you have that right. A guy who’ll treat you special, he’s here right now. - Verbal Jint.
Broken glass litters the hardwood flooring, scarcely avoiding a pair of bare feet brushing across the surface. Books are abandoned from their casing and cracked open to pages that are torn and ripped; words shredded and lost beneath a veil of hatred and rage. Clothes sit aligned with the dust, old wounds reopening and engulfed with a thick blanket of dull misery.
SeHun watches from his place near the closet, arms crossed and eyebrows nit in sad frustration. His chest tugs as the boy, who sits at the foot of the bed with his toes hanging loose, blinks past a blur of tears; the clear droplets sliding down pale cheeks in wordless heartbreak.
“You know you deserve better,” he breathes, stepping towards the bed. Glass crunches under his feet as pages crumple with a silent groan. His eyes fall with an accepting grace as the boy doesn’t even acknowledge his presence. SeHun crouches, knees scrapping against the floor as he places a gentle hand over a frail knee; fingers trailing down to caress the toes in a playful manner. He looks up, searching the boys lost expression with hope. “Look here, LuHan,” SeHun calls, sitting himself on the ground, “look at me.” He places his arms across the boy’s knees, leaning his head onto the warm lap with a sad tilt of his lips.
This catches LuHan’s attention, his blank gaze shifting towards the weight on his thighs. Something flickers across his face, a torn emotion between nostalgic warmth and discomfort, as he stares at the back of SeHun’s head; eyes tracing the warm brown hue of the hair in familiarity.
SeHun lifts his head, dark eyes meeting a pair of dead, war-torn ones in bitter hurt. Just as he thinks he should move away, wondering if he was pushing LuHan past his boundaries, he stills as gentle fingers stroke his head; soft caresses that run through his hair and down the back of his neck. SeHun shivers, the sweet longing and acrimonious agony that clings against LuHan’s touch shaking his core.
“I should,” LuHan starts, “clean up.” His words are raw with buried emotion, voice clogged and wispy in his own attempt to hide himself from judging eyes. He wipes at his tears, lips pulling into a grim line as he scans the room with an inaudible sigh.
SeHun bats his lashes as LuHan shifts, the gentle hand against his head pulling away; leaving only a sour taste of overlooked negligence in the back of his mouth. He watches as LuHan mutely rises to his feet, toes careful and poised as he moves about the room, avoiding the broken fragments of glass as if he was afraid of picking up his own shattered heart.
“LuHan,” SeHun calls, words ringing throughout the room and into silence. His lips part once more, eyes crestfallen as LuHan ignores the world around him while trying to reorganize his devastated one. “LuHan,” SeHun tries again, resting his head against the comforts of the mattress. He immediately recoils, the smell of LuHan and that man stinging his nose. He sniffs, a panic of melancholy rising in his throat rather than anger as LuHan continues to promptly ignore him. However, SeHun has long come to an understanding that only patience and the constant caring call of LuHan’s name made the slight man turn towards him. Angrily barking got him nothing; only a scowl of annoyance and retort for silence.
“You know,” SeHun murmurs, fingers tracing against the wooden floor in longing, “you shouldn’t be getting hurt because of that man.” He continues to moodily stare at LuHan as he noiselessly tidies the fallen books. Making no move to help, knowing that this solitude is what LuHan used to recuperate his torn emotions, SeHun opts to simply observe with his useless words of encouragement.
“You shouldn’t even be shedding tears,” he whispers, hugging his knees and curling into himself, “you’re too beautiful for that.” The shuffling of feet, a rustle of clothes, pages fluttering beneath cold hands; SeHun’s words are met with yet another hush of stillness.
Frustration boils in the pit of SeHun’s stomach, teeth biting down on bloody red lips as his fingers dig into his arms. “You need to be loved LuHan,” he murmurs, not caring if his words fell upon deaf ears, “you have that right, to be given the chance to meet a guy who’ll treat you special.” SeHun pauses, eyes glazing as he digs his face into the crook of his arms. “And he’s here right now with you,” he softly adds.
Words. What are the use of words when they are left unheard and mistreated; ignored past the blink of oblivion and abandoned for none to understand? SeHun hangs his head in a quick signal of defeat, that boiled frustration dissipating like wisps of smoke, opaque curls of a meaningless gray fading into nothingness.
So when SeHun shifts, lifting his head with a grim façade and placing his hands on the ground, he jolts, wincing as he draws his hand to his face. He watches as blood blooms across the shallow cut across his open palm, the stale air biting into his wound. But it was nothing compared to the pain that crisscrosses his heart, or the dark holes that mars LuHan’s pale existence. He must’ve cried out, for LuHan was immediately before him, eyes lost of that hazed misery in the brief moment he bends forward to examine SeHun’s hand.
“You idiot,” LuHan murmurs, placing a cloth against the wound and wrapping it tight, “sit still, you’re not helping with the cleaning, now are you?” The small curve of LuHan’s lips causes SeHun’s own face to light up, eyes finding that twinkle as LuHan ruffles his hair and kisses the top of his head; fingers scratching behind SeHun’s ears before pulling away.
“I’ll make those tears dry from your eyes,” SeHun promises, slowly getting to his feet with a newfound confidence. He cradles his wounded hand to his chest as he walks over to LuHan, whose frail shoulders are weighed back down with that unspoken burden. SeHun reaches out with his good hand for LuHan’s delicate palms, but falters, fingers hesitating to hold onto that hand. Something tugged him away, an invisible force that kept pushing him from LuHan no matter how close he wanted to get.
It was as if fate was telling him he wasn’t allowed to touch the man he desperately treasured.
So he opts to grab onto the sleeve of the small man’s shirt, tugging on it gently to get his attention; which he does. “I’ll help you escape from him,” SeHun murmurs, voice cracking as he stares into LuHan’s curious gaze. “He only gives you scars, while I can give you smiles,” SeHun allows himself a tight grin, his own words enveloping him in flourishing emotions of desire and something that humans call, love.
“SeHun,” LuHan calls, eyes softening in defeat as he caresses the side of SeHun’s face.
SeHun leans into the touch with a bated breath. But instantly, he feels the wrongness of it all. The emotion that trails after LuHan’s touch against his skin isn’t mutual; it’s a platonic feeling of love and companionship, not the love that SeHun’s feels towards the man torturing his pathetic existence.
“Go play,” LuHan orders, picking up a small colorful ball on the table. He throws it across the room, to a corner where a mountain of blankets hid the wooden floor.
Disappointment. Regret. Hurt. Pain. Human pain. The material of LuHan’s shirt slips away from his fingers as LuHan pats his head; like how he does everyday, everytime, every moment he’s upset or happy. SeHun decides to amuse the man, lips curving up in bitter cruelty as he slowly pads his way towards the opposite side of the room; eyeing the colorful ball that sat neatly on top of the blankets. He picks it up and toys with it, turning back to stare at LuHan’s frail form that contrasts the air of solitude that wraps around him and the fallen books.
“Let me be by your side,” SeHun sadly mouths, fingers tightening around the ball - his favorite toy - as he falls onto the mass of blankets - his bed - in a punishing downfall. He whimpers, a keen note of anguish and longing, a yearn for a love he will never be allowed; a forbidden infatuation. “You deserve better,” he sobs, tears streaming down his face in tune with his broken heart.
“You deserve better,” he repeats, his words falling deaf upon LuHan’s human ears.
-end
• if the story didn't make sense: (( basically sehun is a dog (luhan's pet) and is in love with luhan (who is in a relationship but always gets heartbroken). ))
• inspired by the song and mv: 충분히 예뻐(You Deserve Better) - 버블진트(Verbal Jint) ft. Sanchez
• i take no credit for song lyrics used.
• only the string of somewhat coherent words that fabricates this story is mine.
• someone should stop me from writing at 4 AM ;;;;
• and shamelessly pimping aideshou's challenge03: natura non contristatur (please read the other entries and vote for your favorite!)
• hope you enjoyed. thank you for reading!