Spring craving

Feb 09, 2018 09:48




Thisis the first year in a long time when I am really waiting for spring to arrive.

Last time when I had this feeling was in high school. I wanted warmth to come

so I could start wearing nice clothes and attract boys. Did anything change?

Yes, of course. I still want to attract men,  but the list of reasons for this waiting

became longer.

Thiswinter feels too long this year, too dark and too cold. In most of my dreams I

keep running from a killer down the snowy, frozen streets of some dark,

abandoned city. During the day I wear a lot of baggy clothes so I didn't even

notice an extra size of clothes I might need. My electricity bill got as high

as a nice pair of new sunglasses, which I probably won't wear because I’d better

get blinded by a steadily missed sunlight.



Double exposure photography (Alina Levyz), Shanghai, China



Hard to believe that a bit more than a month ago everybody was in a hurry to buy Christmas

presents and Christmas trees. Probably today these trees are laying dead by

dumpsters of my home country. As many adults I didn't feel any special festive

mood. What a wonder that this year when I look around at all Chinese people

getting ready for their special new year, carefully picking presents for their beloved

ones, decorating city into red and pink, I start feeling their mood stronger,

than Christmas holidays I had.

Spring holidays make much more sense to me this year. I am also waiting now for warmth

to finally arrive into the city and into my life.

If to compare cold winter hiding into warm places and a summer warmth which



undresses people, making them closer to the environment, it becomes clear, that

the more layers of clothes we wear, the further we are from the rest of the

world. Personally I feel belonging more to the streets and places when they

don't try to expel me by it's cold wind,

morning frost and long dark days.

Even though I know how Shanghai changes in spring, I don't necessarily look forward

to see spring only in here. I have never been falling in love with places and

cities. Hard to explain why, but I tried to answer this question to myself a

lot of times when I would hear another

love story from someone I know and some city they fell in love with. I have

never had a love story with cities or countries. Somebody once said that no

matter where you go, you always take yourself with you. You can't run away from

yourself. Every time I travel I would discover a new place and would not compare

it with any other.

It is never a good idea to compare your previous

lover with a new one. Everybody is different and every place is different. So

if you don't feel ok in this or that case, there is definitely something in

need of a change in your personal climate area. Because if there is a beautiful

spring inside you, every place will make you feel just right.

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