If your partner cheats on you, you should NEVER, EVER feel guilty. Same thing, if you get involved with someone who's cheating on someone else without telling you the whole story -- it's not your fault, no need to feel guilty... and be aware that he's capable of being a lying ass. I'd recommend stopping in that situation, depending on what you're after, since if he's capable of cheating on other women, he's capable of cheating on you.
What to do? If you were my daughter (she's still a few years away from this stuff, thankfully...) I'd try my best to convince you to stop. Since you're a stranger, I'll say look at it this way: First, you should assume from the beginning that the relationship isn't going to last forever -- a year or two, maximum, maybe. If you're not okay with that, leave. Next, picture a balance scale, with pleasure/good stuff on one side, and pain/drama on the other. You obviously get something valuable out of the relationship, so pile all the good sex/companionship/feelings of validation/presents/whatever on one side. On the other, pile the pain you might realistically expect over the life of the relationship and when the relationship ends. If you think the good stuff outweighs the bad, go ahead... I suppose it all depends on how emotionally involved you're going to get. If you're just after something physical, you'll probably survive this with no problem at all.
Just my opinion. Hope this helps, a little. Feel free to ignore it if you want...
Thanks for your insight. I didn't think anyone even read my LJ. Anyway, I just wanted to get a perspective on the subject. I'm not personally involved with any kind of shinanigans of the sort.
If your partner cheats on you, you should NEVER, EVER feel guilty. Same thing, if you get involved with someone who's cheating on someone else without telling you the whole story -- it's not your fault, no need to feel guilty... and be aware that he's capable of being a lying ass. I'd recommend stopping in that situation, depending on what you're after, since if he's capable of cheating on other women, he's capable of cheating on you.
What to do? If you were my daughter (she's still a few years away from this stuff, thankfully...) I'd try my best to convince you to stop. Since you're a stranger, I'll say look at it this way: First, you should assume from the beginning that the relationship isn't going to last forever -- a year or two, maximum, maybe. If you're not okay with that, leave. Next, picture a balance scale, with pleasure/good stuff on one side, and pain/drama on the other. You obviously get something valuable out of the relationship, so pile all the good sex/companionship/feelings of validation/presents/whatever on one side. On the other, pile the pain you might realistically expect over the life of the relationship and when the relationship ends. If you think the good stuff outweighs the bad, go ahead... I suppose it all depends on how emotionally involved you're going to get. If you're just after something physical, you'll probably survive this with no problem at all.
Just my opinion. Hope this helps, a little. Feel free to ignore it if you want...
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