[BSG] Wanderer's Wandering Daughter [Ficmix]
Title: Wanderer's Wandering Daughter (A Starbuck & Seven Fanmix)
Big Bang Story: On Whom The Pale Moon Gleams by embolalia
Characters: Kara, Daniel, background Kara/Lee
cover image (excluding text) not by me, original artist unknown
WARNING: Spoilers for the entire fic in the quotes!
"All Along the Watchtower" --Sam Anders (Bob Dylan/Bear McCreary) link
"There must be some kind of way out of here,"
Said the joker to the thief,
"There's too much confusion,
I can't get no relief.
"The Spine Song" --Cake Bake Betty link
She reaches out to touch him, and sees her hand, and sees where she is, and starts to scream.
You pleaded,
"Oh kind sir,
Please let me say goodbye"
Your soul ripped from your stomach
You gave an awful cry
A cry
A cry
A cry
And when I have died
Will you use my spine
To swing from tree to tree in search of
Places pleasing to the eye
"Breathing Under Water" --Anoushka Shankar and Karsh Kale link
Emotion leaps in his heart: pride and love, everything he's waited to feel for his daughter. He can't contain it. Nothing could ruin this moment.
Instrumental
"Lost in the Wilderness" --Danny Kosarin & Darius deHaas link
Daniel winces, regret in his eyes. "Earth is dead. The Cylons destroyed it just before the five left. That was why they went back to the colonies--they wanted to warn you not to make cylons."
I never made this world, I didn't even lose it
And I know no one said it was fair
But they had a garden once
They had the chance to choose it
They gave it away including my share
And now we're lost in wilderness
Lost, crying in the wilderness
And if anyone's watching it seems they couldn't care less
We're lost in the wilderness
"Gone to California" --P!nk link
Kara steps away from him quickly, self-consciously, and turns back to the planet before her, strides away across the field as she takes it all in. In the distance are apple trees, and beyond them are mountains. She can hardly contain the hope that pounds suddenly through her. For the first time in her whole life, Kara believes her destiny might be a good one. She whirls toward Daniel. "We have to go back. We have to bring them here. No matter what I am, or you, we have to tell--"
Goin' to California, yes
To resurrect my soul
The sun is always shinin', shinin'
Or at least that's what I'm told
"Wandering Daughter" --Kimya Dawson link
He shrugs. "You were very young. But you took to it right away. To art, too. I remember showing you the symbol I had tried to paint, the symbol in the clouds. It was like you knew what it meant."
She laughs, and looks up at him with the same wonder she did that day.
"I didn't think you could see the stream, not like I could, but I could see you in it. I knew you had to know about the storm. And I knew you would be important."
I am the wanderer's wandering daughter
Wrestle the pestle for the sake of the mortar
I love as I breathe and leave as I live
My cast iron shield's a titanium sieve
And a castle that's built on confusion and doubt
Is a nickel within and a dollar without
Just when the shoes seem so big I can't win
I fill my own sneakers and take off again
"Precious Metals" --The Russian Futurists link
For a moment Daniel studies her carefully and she wonders what he would make of her if he could see her the way she was before, with scars and tattoos and long-healed breaks.
"What happened to you?" he asks softly.
She shakes her head, laughter bubbling up at the ridiculousness of the question. "What, since I was six?"
"Yes," he says firmly. "Tell me."
You used to think that your life was precious metals and rose petals
But now as you're growing up you're finding it's nail-biting and teeth-grinding
That crown you wore with the Rhinestones is now just thorns, needles and pinecones
And here's one last thing that you must learn too; what keeps you warm can also burn you
Time's sinister sundials make your days hard as city streets
You fall in traps, jet black in the hole that your self-pity eats
I'm playing cards real close to my chest so you can't see what I've got
One minute we're sub-zero and in the same breath piping hot
"We're All In This Together" --Ben Lee link
She's a Cylon.
Just like Athena, just like Boomer, just like Leoben. More like Hera, maybe, but it hardly matters. She, Starbuck, is the enemy. There's a horrible irony to it, that she's been fighting herself this whole time.
Her father is a Cylon.
Gods she wishes she were really Adama's daughter. She'd even take being Lee's sister if this could just not be true. A sob turns into a bark of laughter.
Lee...she shot him. Was it something inside her that made her do it? Was it really an accident?
After all her aspersions on Helo's love for Athena, was hers ever real?
C'mon baby
I dont mean to rush you
I only wanted to reach out and touch you
I've gotta start to open my heart
I know you think
About jumping ship before it sinks
But we're all in this together
"You Are The Moon" --The Hush Sound link
She stays there, wrapped up in her thoughts, for a long time. And then, just as exhaustion is becoming more powerful than the cold, Kara wipes her hands on the edge of her shirt and looks up. Her breath fades away into silence. There above her is the answer, the answer that's been there all along. No matter what Daniel knows about Earth, or the thirteenth tribe for that matter, these are the stars the Gods showed her on Kobol.
Wild joy transforms her face, even though no one is there to see it. All the loneliness and pain that have driven her since Lee turned her away, since New Caprica, since Zak died and even before - she can accept it all, finally, because it's brought her to this moment.
Shadows all around you as you surface from the dark
Emerging from the gentle grip of night's unfolding arms
Darkness, darkness everywhere, do you feel all alone?
The subtle grace of gravity, the heavy weight of stone
"Scars and Stitches" --Guster link
Daniel recoils and she realizes suddenly that he shared her memory. Her glee at Socrata jumping around, then the sudden terror as her mother wrenched her toward the door. Then the pain. Kara purses her lips. "Anyway, we can't change that. You'll have to give me my tattoos again, though. And scars."
He starts to object but Kara cuts him off. "We have to. Believe me, I'd go through worse for these people."
I don’t mind falling down and scraping up my knees
Scars and stitches always fade and only strengthen me
But with my eyes as wide as pearls
My only centerpiece
Is taken like a dead man's urn and tossed into the sea
"guardian" --Alanis Morissette link
Kara nods. "I love you, too." A tear streaks back from the corner of her eye, finding its way along her temple, and Daniel flicks the machine on. His daughter's eyes snap shut, her body shuddering for a moment that seems to last forever before going limp. She'll remember nothing more of the last weeks than their flights over the planet. He has to give her some bit of hope to hold onto.
Daniel presses a kiss to her cheek and lifts her in his arms. All that's left is to set her in her Viper and release her into space. She'll find her way back to him, someday. He can't see when, or what she'll survive in the meantime, but he knows as he's always known that there's no need for goodbye.
I’ll be your keeper for life as your guardian
I’ll be your warrior of care your first warden
I’ll be your angel on call, I’ll be on demand
The greatest honor of all, as your guardian
Now no more smiling mid crestfall
No more managing unmanageables
No more holding still in the hailstorm
"A Little Too Much" --Natasha Bedingfield link
He doesn't want to breathe, doesn't want to risk this being a dream, but somehow she stirs, looks up at him beatifically.
"Kara?" he asks in wonder.
"Yeah," she says, then her eyes grow worried. "I'm sorry I left. But I'm back now. I'll explain it all in the morning."
"You'll be here in the morning."
She grins, nodding, love in her eyes that soothes everything aching in his heart. "I will."
Sometimes we're trapped in the circle
'Til we're digging holes in the ground
We're trying, but nothing is working
But still I want you around
'Cause if I'm lost in the desert
I know somehow you'll find me
And if I drown in the oceans,
You'll be the first to rescue me
"Dreilide Thrace Sonata No. 1" --Dreilide Thrace (Bear McCreary) link
Instrumental
Big Bang Story: On Whom The Pale Moon Gleams by embolalia
Characters: Kara, Daniel, background Kara/Lee
cover image (excluding text) not by me, original artist unknown
WARNING: Spoilers for the entire fic in the quotes!
"All Along the Watchtower" --Sam Anders (Bob Dylan/Bear McCreary) link
"There must be some kind of way out of here,"
Said the joker to the thief,
"There's too much confusion,
I can't get no relief.
"The Spine Song" --Cake Bake Betty link
She reaches out to touch him, and sees her hand, and sees where she is, and starts to scream.
You pleaded,
"Oh kind sir,
Please let me say goodbye"
Your soul ripped from your stomach
You gave an awful cry
A cry
A cry
A cry
And when I have died
Will you use my spine
To swing from tree to tree in search of
Places pleasing to the eye
"Breathing Under Water" --Anoushka Shankar and Karsh Kale link
Emotion leaps in his heart: pride and love, everything he's waited to feel for his daughter. He can't contain it. Nothing could ruin this moment.
Instrumental
"Lost in the Wilderness" --Danny Kosarin & Darius deHaas link
Daniel winces, regret in his eyes. "Earth is dead. The Cylons destroyed it just before the five left. That was why they went back to the colonies--they wanted to warn you not to make cylons."
I never made this world, I didn't even lose it
And I know no one said it was fair
But they had a garden once
They had the chance to choose it
They gave it away including my share
And now we're lost in wilderness
Lost, crying in the wilderness
And if anyone's watching it seems they couldn't care less
We're lost in the wilderness
"Gone to California" --P!nk link
Kara steps away from him quickly, self-consciously, and turns back to the planet before her, strides away across the field as she takes it all in. In the distance are apple trees, and beyond them are mountains. She can hardly contain the hope that pounds suddenly through her. For the first time in her whole life, Kara believes her destiny might be a good one. She whirls toward Daniel. "We have to go back. We have to bring them here. No matter what I am, or you, we have to tell--"
Goin' to California, yes
To resurrect my soul
The sun is always shinin', shinin'
Or at least that's what I'm told
"Wandering Daughter" --Kimya Dawson link
He shrugs. "You were very young. But you took to it right away. To art, too. I remember showing you the symbol I had tried to paint, the symbol in the clouds. It was like you knew what it meant."
She laughs, and looks up at him with the same wonder she did that day.
"I didn't think you could see the stream, not like I could, but I could see you in it. I knew you had to know about the storm. And I knew you would be important."
I am the wanderer's wandering daughter
Wrestle the pestle for the sake of the mortar
I love as I breathe and leave as I live
My cast iron shield's a titanium sieve
And a castle that's built on confusion and doubt
Is a nickel within and a dollar without
Just when the shoes seem so big I can't win
I fill my own sneakers and take off again
"Precious Metals" --The Russian Futurists link
For a moment Daniel studies her carefully and she wonders what he would make of her if he could see her the way she was before, with scars and tattoos and long-healed breaks.
"What happened to you?" he asks softly.
She shakes her head, laughter bubbling up at the ridiculousness of the question. "What, since I was six?"
"Yes," he says firmly. "Tell me."
You used to think that your life was precious metals and rose petals
But now as you're growing up you're finding it's nail-biting and teeth-grinding
That crown you wore with the Rhinestones is now just thorns, needles and pinecones
And here's one last thing that you must learn too; what keeps you warm can also burn you
Time's sinister sundials make your days hard as city streets
You fall in traps, jet black in the hole that your self-pity eats
I'm playing cards real close to my chest so you can't see what I've got
One minute we're sub-zero and in the same breath piping hot
"We're All In This Together" --Ben Lee link
She's a Cylon.
Just like Athena, just like Boomer, just like Leoben. More like Hera, maybe, but it hardly matters. She, Starbuck, is the enemy. There's a horrible irony to it, that she's been fighting herself this whole time.
Her father is a Cylon.
Gods she wishes she were really Adama's daughter. She'd even take being Lee's sister if this could just not be true. A sob turns into a bark of laughter.
Lee...she shot him. Was it something inside her that made her do it? Was it really an accident?
After all her aspersions on Helo's love for Athena, was hers ever real?
C'mon baby
I dont mean to rush you
I only wanted to reach out and touch you
I've gotta start to open my heart
I know you think
About jumping ship before it sinks
But we're all in this together
"You Are The Moon" --The Hush Sound link
She stays there, wrapped up in her thoughts, for a long time. And then, just as exhaustion is becoming more powerful than the cold, Kara wipes her hands on the edge of her shirt and looks up. Her breath fades away into silence. There above her is the answer, the answer that's been there all along. No matter what Daniel knows about Earth, or the thirteenth tribe for that matter, these are the stars the Gods showed her on Kobol.
Wild joy transforms her face, even though no one is there to see it. All the loneliness and pain that have driven her since Lee turned her away, since New Caprica, since Zak died and even before - she can accept it all, finally, because it's brought her to this moment.
Shadows all around you as you surface from the dark
Emerging from the gentle grip of night's unfolding arms
Darkness, darkness everywhere, do you feel all alone?
The subtle grace of gravity, the heavy weight of stone
"Scars and Stitches" --Guster link
Daniel recoils and she realizes suddenly that he shared her memory. Her glee at Socrata jumping around, then the sudden terror as her mother wrenched her toward the door. Then the pain. Kara purses her lips. "Anyway, we can't change that. You'll have to give me my tattoos again, though. And scars."
He starts to object but Kara cuts him off. "We have to. Believe me, I'd go through worse for these people."
I don’t mind falling down and scraping up my knees
Scars and stitches always fade and only strengthen me
But with my eyes as wide as pearls
My only centerpiece
Is taken like a dead man's urn and tossed into the sea
"guardian" --Alanis Morissette link
Kara nods. "I love you, too." A tear streaks back from the corner of her eye, finding its way along her temple, and Daniel flicks the machine on. His daughter's eyes snap shut, her body shuddering for a moment that seems to last forever before going limp. She'll remember nothing more of the last weeks than their flights over the planet. He has to give her some bit of hope to hold onto.
Daniel presses a kiss to her cheek and lifts her in his arms. All that's left is to set her in her Viper and release her into space. She'll find her way back to him, someday. He can't see when, or what she'll survive in the meantime, but he knows as he's always known that there's no need for goodbye.
I’ll be your keeper for life as your guardian
I’ll be your warrior of care your first warden
I’ll be your angel on call, I’ll be on demand
The greatest honor of all, as your guardian
Now no more smiling mid crestfall
No more managing unmanageables
No more holding still in the hailstorm
"A Little Too Much" --Natasha Bedingfield link
He doesn't want to breathe, doesn't want to risk this being a dream, but somehow she stirs, looks up at him beatifically.
"Kara?" he asks in wonder.
"Yeah," she says, then her eyes grow worried. "I'm sorry I left. But I'm back now. I'll explain it all in the morning."
"You'll be here in the morning."
She grins, nodding, love in her eyes that soothes everything aching in his heart. "I will."
Sometimes we're trapped in the circle
'Til we're digging holes in the ground
We're trying, but nothing is working
But still I want you around
'Cause if I'm lost in the desert
I know somehow you'll find me
And if I drown in the oceans,
You'll be the first to rescue me
"Dreilide Thrace Sonata No. 1" --Dreilide Thrace (Bear McCreary) link
Instrumental