Homecoming, part the first
Normally, when I get behind in blogging, as I have been lately, I just let any events slide that I didn't get the chance to write about. But as the purpose of this journal shifts from "things other people might want to read" to "things I may want to read later," I'm going to break that rule. So I'm rewinding a couple of weeks to cover the things that I did.
So a couple of weeks ago, we went up to the University of Massachusetts for Homecoming. Which is somewhat odd, since neither of us attended UMass. Lemme 'splain: Elora attended Smith, which, being a women's college, has neither a football team nor a marching band. However, Smith is part of a "five-college consortium," which also includes UMass, so Smith students who wanted to participate in band could join the UMass band. With me so far? The UMass band had a director who was there for over 30 years, and became a well-loved institution at the school. Unfortunately, he passed away unexpectedly just a few weeks ago, after a band performance in Ohio. Normally, at Homecoming, there's an "alumni band" performance at halftime, where all the old bandies get to do a bit of marching and play a few pieces. (I assume many schools have this; Penn State does.) I don't know how many people normally come for the alumni band, but it became a really big deal, with over 950 alumni showing up to honor their director. So Elora felt it was important to go, and I supported that idea.
I'd never been up to Smith or UMass before. We'd gone to visit PSU once, but Massachusetts was slightly too far away to drag Sparky on a weekend trip, but he's older now, so we went, departing right after school on Friday afternoon. We also got to test out the mobile capabilities of our new phones, which work nicely, thanks very much. (But why does every mapping program think that the best way to get from New Jersey to Connecticut is the Cross-Bronx Expressway? We had to beat the things -- both the one in the dashboard and the ones in our phones -- into submission before they'd concede to take us on the Tappan Zee. I guess the computers have never tried driving through New York City on a Friday afternoon.)
We got a hotel in Northampton, which is where Smith is, but about a half-hour away from Amherst, where UMass is, which was fine, since all the hotels in Amherst were full. On Saturday, Elora had to get up at Dark O'Clock to go over to UMass, while Sparky and I stayed at the hotel and "enjoyed" the "continental breakfast." Elora came back around 11:00, but didn't have to be at the stadium for the game until 3:00 or so, but with parking bound to fill, we figured we'd go over to campus, grab a space, and then...do something...for a few hours. Which we did.
"Something" turned out to be wandering around the UMass campus, which I figured would be fine, because most college campuses I've seen are at least moderately interesting. I almost hesitate to say this, because there might be a UMass alum lurking nearby or something, but the campus? Not very attractive. I mean, it wasn't a run-down slum or anything, it's just that I've been to a bunch of college campuses in my life, and if I were to rank them all in order of "pleasantness," somebody has to be at the bottom, and I think it would be UMass. We visited their library, which is this 26-story tower and kind of a focal point to campus, but, as it turns out, is rather unimpressive. It's tall, sure, but the floors themselves are too small, and therefore cramped, and while it's supposed to have great views...there's not much to look at, really.
We had lunch in a student dining commons -- yes, really; we did it for nostalgia purposes, as it was the dining hall where Elora used to eat after band practices. Turns out, Saturday brunch at a campus dining hall is just as bad now as you remember it being. I've seen all these articles about the modernizing of campus life, but it wasn't in evidence here, so I had a salad. It wasn't until we were leaving that we noticed a part of the room we'd missed before, which had the sandwich bar, and the pancake bar, and I dunno, probably a sushi bar and three other kinds of bar too. So, whoops.
We did our best wandering around after that, but the big problem with the weather on that particular day was that while it wasn't too cold, it was extraordinarily windy. Which, OK, good football weather, but not so good if you're a marching band, and really not a lot of fun for hanging around campus. We eventually located the student bookstore (which isn't in the Student Union, but in the basement of this singularly ugly campus hotel), and bought Sparky a wool cap that said "UMass" on it, so at least he'd blend in. (I wasn't wearing my PSU colors, for the record. I happen to have a maroon-ish sweatshirt, so I went with that, but I needed a jacket and gloves on top of that, and it was still cold.
Eventually it got to be time to head over to the stadium. We were early, sure, but the band had to gather together and do...band stuff...look, I don't know; I'm about as musical as a concrete block over here. As we walked through the various parking lots, there was a bunch of tailgating going on, and the atmosphere started to become very familiar to me. I actually had a very strong urge to shout out a "We are!" and I was only prevented by the certain knowledge that nobody would answer. That died down once I got into the band-only area, and Sparky and I eventually moved into the stands.
You need to understand at this point that I went to Penn State, and therefore I have a degree in College Football Spectating, because I made a number of assumptions based on that experience, most of which turned out to be wrong. I knew that Section 9 of the stadium had been set aside for the alumni band, and that "friends and family," which included me, were supposed to sit in Section 10. I figured that if we had to sit in separate sections, finding Elora again after the game was going to be no easy trick, so I wanted to get in there early and stake out seats on the aisle. It should be noted that Elora thought I was crazy. Guys -- and here I'm speaking to PSU alums, and the other Big Ten alums, and anybody who went to a school with a major-sized stadium -- the UMass stadium is tiny. It's wee. It's borderline adorable. I realize it sounds mean to say that, but I'm just being honest, here. It's really just two lines of concrete risers, no end-zone seats or anything. Staking out seats an hour ahead of time was massive overkill. When the alumni band started filtering in (they only performed at halftime, not pre-game), Elora basically walked up the steps to us, sat down immediately across the aisle, and asked me to tell her again how difficult it would be for us to find each other. I attempted to maintain my dignity.
The other thing I wasn't prepared for was how low the seats were. Even sitting near the top of the stands, I was still at a much lower angle than I was used to, and with the seats being near the end zone, my viewing angle was terrible. See, I was there for the band, yes, but I also knew there was going to be 60 minutes of football, and I wanted to enjoy that (see degree in Spectating, above). As it turns out, at UMass, the football game seems to just be an excuse for a band performance. Maybe I was influence by the fact that I was sitting in the middle of the band and band-affiliated people, but the only people actually paying any attention seemed to be me, and the guy right in front of me.
However, it didn't matter all that much, because I honestly think it was the worst football game I've ever seen. I mentioned before that the opponent was the Richmond Spiders, who I've later learned -- I think I have this right -- were playing without their first-, second-, OR third-string quarterbacks. I have no idea who was doing the signal-calling, but evidently they didn't want to do anything more complicated than hand off. I'm being literal when I say I don't think I saw them throw a single pass. Of course, with the ridiculous wind, and the fact that the stadium is open at both ends, UMass wasn't really throwing either. But that might have just been the game plan. At one point, our view was blocked by some socializing band-folks, but I leaned around them, and what I saw was so surprising that I just blurted out:
Me: Oh my god, they threw a pass!
Guy in front of me: What? You're kidding! Was it complete?
Me: Uh...well, yeah, looks that way. I, um, don't think they got back to the line of scrimmage, though.
Guy: Well, no, they probably wouldn't. We don't do a lot of passing.
So...yeah, the game went like that. "Two yards and a cloud of dust," as it were. And with the wind playing havoc with the kicking and punting games, it wasn't pretty. UMass scored a touchdown at one point, but I couldn't tell you how they managed it.
But, the band! Right? Yeah, the band was quite impressive. Sadly, with so many people in the alumni band, there wasn't any room for them to march. (I figured even that many people just walking onto the field would destroy it, but it's turf, not grass, which the older bandies were scornful about.) They played a bunch of UMass fight songs...which sound enough like the PSU fight songs, and other fight songs I've heard, that I have to wonder if "fight song" is a genre unto itself, with certain known conventions. In my brain, the words to "Fight On State" kept trying to fit themselves to the notes I was hearing. They also played a "Phantom of the Opera" medley, which was a reprise of their show from Elora's year. I learned that it was quite well received when Elora's group did it, but it does seem somewhat funny, or ironic, or something, that out of 30+ years of shows to choose from, they picked a piece that Elora specifically remembers playing, but I guess whatever they picked would be from somebody's year.
After the halftime show, a lot of the alumni band stayed in the parking lot, and kept right on playing, rather than coming back to the stands. My highly-tuned football sensibilities started to be offended, just on principle, but after enduring part of the third quarter, I really couldn't blame them. Besides, it was freezing up there in the wind, so once Elora came back and found us again, we just bailed. We hung out in the parking lot for a bit, and I got to meet some of her friends from the band, which was nice. That included a guy she'd gone out with a couple of times, which was a new experience for me. I handled it like the mature adult that I am, but I did note that he had the decency to actually look 20 years older than the photo that was the only way I'd seen him before. And, y'know, not as good-looking as me, not that I'm subjective or anything.
So that was all we saw of UMass, and I don't particularly feel the need to see any more of it.
So a couple of weeks ago, we went up to the University of Massachusetts for Homecoming. Which is somewhat odd, since neither of us attended UMass. Lemme 'splain: Elora attended Smith, which, being a women's college, has neither a football team nor a marching band. However, Smith is part of a "five-college consortium," which also includes UMass, so Smith students who wanted to participate in band could join the UMass band. With me so far? The UMass band had a director who was there for over 30 years, and became a well-loved institution at the school. Unfortunately, he passed away unexpectedly just a few weeks ago, after a band performance in Ohio. Normally, at Homecoming, there's an "alumni band" performance at halftime, where all the old bandies get to do a bit of marching and play a few pieces. (I assume many schools have this; Penn State does.) I don't know how many people normally come for the alumni band, but it became a really big deal, with over 950 alumni showing up to honor their director. So Elora felt it was important to go, and I supported that idea.
I'd never been up to Smith or UMass before. We'd gone to visit PSU once, but Massachusetts was slightly too far away to drag Sparky on a weekend trip, but he's older now, so we went, departing right after school on Friday afternoon. We also got to test out the mobile capabilities of our new phones, which work nicely, thanks very much. (But why does every mapping program think that the best way to get from New Jersey to Connecticut is the Cross-Bronx Expressway? We had to beat the things -- both the one in the dashboard and the ones in our phones -- into submission before they'd concede to take us on the Tappan Zee. I guess the computers have never tried driving through New York City on a Friday afternoon.)
We got a hotel in Northampton, which is where Smith is, but about a half-hour away from Amherst, where UMass is, which was fine, since all the hotels in Amherst were full. On Saturday, Elora had to get up at Dark O'Clock to go over to UMass, while Sparky and I stayed at the hotel and "enjoyed" the "continental breakfast." Elora came back around 11:00, but didn't have to be at the stadium for the game until 3:00 or so, but with parking bound to fill, we figured we'd go over to campus, grab a space, and then...do something...for a few hours. Which we did.
"Something" turned out to be wandering around the UMass campus, which I figured would be fine, because most college campuses I've seen are at least moderately interesting. I almost hesitate to say this, because there might be a UMass alum lurking nearby or something, but the campus? Not very attractive. I mean, it wasn't a run-down slum or anything, it's just that I've been to a bunch of college campuses in my life, and if I were to rank them all in order of "pleasantness," somebody has to be at the bottom, and I think it would be UMass. We visited their library, which is this 26-story tower and kind of a focal point to campus, but, as it turns out, is rather unimpressive. It's tall, sure, but the floors themselves are too small, and therefore cramped, and while it's supposed to have great views...there's not much to look at, really.
We had lunch in a student dining commons -- yes, really; we did it for nostalgia purposes, as it was the dining hall where Elora used to eat after band practices. Turns out, Saturday brunch at a campus dining hall is just as bad now as you remember it being. I've seen all these articles about the modernizing of campus life, but it wasn't in evidence here, so I had a salad. It wasn't until we were leaving that we noticed a part of the room we'd missed before, which had the sandwich bar, and the pancake bar, and I dunno, probably a sushi bar and three other kinds of bar too. So, whoops.
We did our best wandering around after that, but the big problem with the weather on that particular day was that while it wasn't too cold, it was extraordinarily windy. Which, OK, good football weather, but not so good if you're a marching band, and really not a lot of fun for hanging around campus. We eventually located the student bookstore (which isn't in the Student Union, but in the basement of this singularly ugly campus hotel), and bought Sparky a wool cap that said "UMass" on it, so at least he'd blend in. (I wasn't wearing my PSU colors, for the record. I happen to have a maroon-ish sweatshirt, so I went with that, but I needed a jacket and gloves on top of that, and it was still cold.
Eventually it got to be time to head over to the stadium. We were early, sure, but the band had to gather together and do...band stuff...look, I don't know; I'm about as musical as a concrete block over here. As we walked through the various parking lots, there was a bunch of tailgating going on, and the atmosphere started to become very familiar to me. I actually had a very strong urge to shout out a "We are!" and I was only prevented by the certain knowledge that nobody would answer. That died down once I got into the band-only area, and Sparky and I eventually moved into the stands.
You need to understand at this point that I went to Penn State, and therefore I have a degree in College Football Spectating, because I made a number of assumptions based on that experience, most of which turned out to be wrong. I knew that Section 9 of the stadium had been set aside for the alumni band, and that "friends and family," which included me, were supposed to sit in Section 10. I figured that if we had to sit in separate sections, finding Elora again after the game was going to be no easy trick, so I wanted to get in there early and stake out seats on the aisle. It should be noted that Elora thought I was crazy. Guys -- and here I'm speaking to PSU alums, and the other Big Ten alums, and anybody who went to a school with a major-sized stadium -- the UMass stadium is tiny. It's wee. It's borderline adorable. I realize it sounds mean to say that, but I'm just being honest, here. It's really just two lines of concrete risers, no end-zone seats or anything. Staking out seats an hour ahead of time was massive overkill. When the alumni band started filtering in (they only performed at halftime, not pre-game), Elora basically walked up the steps to us, sat down immediately across the aisle, and asked me to tell her again how difficult it would be for us to find each other. I attempted to maintain my dignity.
The other thing I wasn't prepared for was how low the seats were. Even sitting near the top of the stands, I was still at a much lower angle than I was used to, and with the seats being near the end zone, my viewing angle was terrible. See, I was there for the band, yes, but I also knew there was going to be 60 minutes of football, and I wanted to enjoy that (see degree in Spectating, above). As it turns out, at UMass, the football game seems to just be an excuse for a band performance. Maybe I was influence by the fact that I was sitting in the middle of the band and band-affiliated people, but the only people actually paying any attention seemed to be me, and the guy right in front of me.
However, it didn't matter all that much, because I honestly think it was the worst football game I've ever seen. I mentioned before that the opponent was the Richmond Spiders, who I've later learned -- I think I have this right -- were playing without their first-, second-, OR third-string quarterbacks. I have no idea who was doing the signal-calling, but evidently they didn't want to do anything more complicated than hand off. I'm being literal when I say I don't think I saw them throw a single pass. Of course, with the ridiculous wind, and the fact that the stadium is open at both ends, UMass wasn't really throwing either. But that might have just been the game plan. At one point, our view was blocked by some socializing band-folks, but I leaned around them, and what I saw was so surprising that I just blurted out:
Me: Oh my god, they threw a pass!
Guy in front of me: What? You're kidding! Was it complete?
Me: Uh...well, yeah, looks that way. I, um, don't think they got back to the line of scrimmage, though.
Guy: Well, no, they probably wouldn't. We don't do a lot of passing.
So...yeah, the game went like that. "Two yards and a cloud of dust," as it were. And with the wind playing havoc with the kicking and punting games, it wasn't pretty. UMass scored a touchdown at one point, but I couldn't tell you how they managed it.
But, the band! Right? Yeah, the band was quite impressive. Sadly, with so many people in the alumni band, there wasn't any room for them to march. (I figured even that many people just walking onto the field would destroy it, but it's turf, not grass, which the older bandies were scornful about.) They played a bunch of UMass fight songs...which sound enough like the PSU fight songs, and other fight songs I've heard, that I have to wonder if "fight song" is a genre unto itself, with certain known conventions. In my brain, the words to "Fight On State" kept trying to fit themselves to the notes I was hearing. They also played a "Phantom of the Opera" medley, which was a reprise of their show from Elora's year. I learned that it was quite well received when Elora's group did it, but it does seem somewhat funny, or ironic, or something, that out of 30+ years of shows to choose from, they picked a piece that Elora specifically remembers playing, but I guess whatever they picked would be from somebody's year.
After the halftime show, a lot of the alumni band stayed in the parking lot, and kept right on playing, rather than coming back to the stands. My highly-tuned football sensibilities started to be offended, just on principle, but after enduring part of the third quarter, I really couldn't blame them. Besides, it was freezing up there in the wind, so once Elora came back and found us again, we just bailed. We hung out in the parking lot for a bit, and I got to meet some of her friends from the band, which was nice. That included a guy she'd gone out with a couple of times, which was a new experience for me. I handled it like the mature adult that I am, but I did note that he had the decency to actually look 20 years older than the photo that was the only way I'd seen him before. And, y'know, not as good-looking as me, not that I'm subjective or anything.
So that was all we saw of UMass, and I don't particularly feel the need to see any more of it.