Beautiful Fall
I love fall... autumn... whatever. I really dont know why I do. Maybe it's the change that nature takes, the color of the leaves changing, the cooler more comfortable weather, maybe it's because its when school starts and it like a new beginning, maybe its getting to leave my windows open at night and get my room down to 50 degrees. I just think fall is magical... it sounds funny but I do, I love it! I could live in fall forever if I could have mostly fall with two months of summer and two months of winter that would be perfect! Winter gets too long and Summer gets too HOT!!
Anyways I didnt plan on writing about the seasons.
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. I really should write down my thoughts more often. I usually write in my journal but my room is a mess and I cant find it. But I really should do more writing... journaling. I dont know why I dont... well probably because I feel that I just dont have time for it. I feel so busy all the time, and yet I have periods of time when I sit around doing nothing for a few hours.
I have realized that yes its nice to be living with my parents and not having to pay rent or buy groceries, but I really enjoyed living on my own. I really want to have my own house or condo. Not an apartment, something that is mine. I really really do. But I dont think thats going to happen anytime soon. I actually liked living alone. I mean it was a bit boring at times, but for the most part it was nice to wake up to quiet and go to sleep with quiet and to come and go as I wanted just being by myself and being happy with that. Now dont get me wrong it would be nice to live with other people too. Especially a man some day.
So I was thinking about this today: Why are we (a society) so hooked, maybe hooked isnt the right word, so fixated on being in relationships, finding a girlfriend or boyfriend? Why is it so important to us?
I have always wanted to have a boyfriend to be in a serious relationship, and when I was thinking about it today I was trying to figure out why... why do I have such a strong desire to be in a relationship? Why am I not happy to be alone? And I know that its because God created man and woman to be together, but why do I have this desire when I dont even know what its like or what to expect? I dont know if that makes sense. I feel that I'm the only one not getting what I want and I've been so patient and good and I just dont get why everyone else has what I want to have. I'm not jealous I just want to know when it will be my turn? When???
Well... I think I'm gonna end with that for now... go to sleep.
peace and love
Anyways I didnt plan on writing about the seasons.
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. I really should write down my thoughts more often. I usually write in my journal but my room is a mess and I cant find it. But I really should do more writing... journaling. I dont know why I dont... well probably because I feel that I just dont have time for it. I feel so busy all the time, and yet I have periods of time when I sit around doing nothing for a few hours.
I have realized that yes its nice to be living with my parents and not having to pay rent or buy groceries, but I really enjoyed living on my own. I really want to have my own house or condo. Not an apartment, something that is mine. I really really do. But I dont think thats going to happen anytime soon. I actually liked living alone. I mean it was a bit boring at times, but for the most part it was nice to wake up to quiet and go to sleep with quiet and to come and go as I wanted just being by myself and being happy with that. Now dont get me wrong it would be nice to live with other people too. Especially a man some day.
So I was thinking about this today: Why are we (a society) so hooked, maybe hooked isnt the right word, so fixated on being in relationships, finding a girlfriend or boyfriend? Why is it so important to us?
I have always wanted to have a boyfriend to be in a serious relationship, and when I was thinking about it today I was trying to figure out why... why do I have such a strong desire to be in a relationship? Why am I not happy to be alone? And I know that its because God created man and woman to be together, but why do I have this desire when I dont even know what its like or what to expect? I dont know if that makes sense. I feel that I'm the only one not getting what I want and I've been so patient and good and I just dont get why everyone else has what I want to have. I'm not jealous I just want to know when it will be my turn? When???
Well... I think I'm gonna end with that for now... go to sleep.
peace and love