Friday Adventures in Jeeping
NOTE: A special extra to reward your Saturday reading. True story from yesterday afternoon. Read to the cut before clicking it for added suspense!
So yesterday i finally start feeling OK. Somewhat normal anyways. i got up and made Matt some coffee before he left for work. i did a quick post, took a shower and started putting the kitchen together. i thought about going to see "Benjamin Button" at the Chase at 11:30, but decided instead to call Matt and see if he'd like me to come meet him for lunch. Stupid question, eh? So we met at noon and went down to this old chinese buffet we used to go to long ago. i think i recognized some of the patrons from way long ago. We ate a bit and discussed directorbear's post about his deadbeat 'house guest' that i hadn't seen yet. i hate users like that and said, "y'know, we should go down there and throw the fucker out ourselves!" Matt got that gleem in his little eyes that spelled trouble and said, "y'know, i could be out by 3 and we could be there about 7:30." i tried texting him, but didn't get a response and i didn't want to just drop in unannounced. Besides, he probably had to work this weekend. i texted him anyway and said to get back to me when he woke up. No matter.
About 1, i dropped Matt back off at work and started to head home. i slightly smelled a weird smell and thought it might be that rear brake that Matt (and the asshole cop from Marlbourgh - if you're a local, you'll know what i mean) said was smoking last Monday night, but the right mirror was angled down and i could see the wheel and it was fine. Still, the Jeep didn't seem to have quite the "uumph" and i was rolling at about 50 on I-44. i got off at the Vandeventer exit as usual. "Frost/Nixon" was playing at the Moolah just past JJ's and i could hang a left and go there, but it was a little too late (i hate walking in late) so i turned south to head home.
It's only about 100 feet from making the right on "Vennevenner" to making a left on Shaw to head up past the Garden and home. As i approached in the left turn lane, traffic was light but there was a minivan waiting to make a left and a couple of cars on-coming so i pushed the clutch and the brake. CRACK!! The brake pedal went a little limp which ain't good, so i veered into the right lane to go around him and then i started hearing other crunching and groaning and then as i passed him i felt the right sag and then saw the right wheel rolling ahead of me. The good thing is that at the upper right corner of this intersection is an island with a gazebo on it and a little ring road around it. So i headed for the far side of the island as the sparks flew and the axle housing made an agonizing screech as it etched the pavement. i was able to get it just far enough to get my ass out of the traffic lane before it came to a halt. The "Prodigal Wheel" - tire, hub and axle - wobbled around and came to rest at the left curb just 15 feet ahead of me.
i got out of the jeep and looked around. A few cars slowed down as i got out and asked if i needed any help. i just waved them off. i was amazingly calm and pulled out my phone. i had the tow truck on speed-dial and Bubba the truck driver was in and i said "come and get me, i'm just over the hill". He said he'd be there in 10. i just hung out and wait. A red-headed junior bullgoon fresh out of the academy rolled up. "i've got a tow truck on the way", i said and he just gave me a bored look and started punching my tags into his computer. What a dickhead. Didn't even get out of the car.
About that time, Bubba showed up across the intersection and he pulled backwards. When the truck pulled in, the cop didn't even get out of his car, but told Bubba to pull the jeep forward instead of blocking traffic to get it up. Then he left. Didn't even help. Gee, thanx. i was about to call Randy/redhochipe who i knew was off this week to come pic me up when Matt returned my call. He was itching to leave work anyway so he said he'd meet me at the garage. We hooked up the jeep and went over the hill to the shop.
Matt picked me up about 10 minutes later and we went home. As we walked up to the door, i saw a post-it on the stormdoor and knew it was the friggin' UPS guy. They don't deliver on Saturdays and i really wanted that package, too. "Shit, SHit, SHIT!!" i lost it and kicked the front door about five times. i went in and through my shit down and Matt just turned around and left. i was putting some stuff together and then about 15 minutes later, Matt walked in with my package. Seems he talks to the guy that comes to the office and knows how they work an area, so he followed the pattern until he caught up with him.
i may not have a car, but i've got the best husband in the world.
So yesterday i finally start feeling OK. Somewhat normal anyways. i got up and made Matt some coffee before he left for work. i did a quick post, took a shower and started putting the kitchen together. i thought about going to see "Benjamin Button" at the Chase at 11:30, but decided instead to call Matt and see if he'd like me to come meet him for lunch. Stupid question, eh? So we met at noon and went down to this old chinese buffet we used to go to long ago. i think i recognized some of the patrons from way long ago. We ate a bit and discussed directorbear's post about his deadbeat 'house guest' that i hadn't seen yet. i hate users like that and said, "y'know, we should go down there and throw the fucker out ourselves!" Matt got that gleem in his little eyes that spelled trouble and said, "y'know, i could be out by 3 and we could be there about 7:30." i tried texting him, but didn't get a response and i didn't want to just drop in unannounced. Besides, he probably had to work this weekend. i texted him anyway and said to get back to me when he woke up. No matter.
About 1, i dropped Matt back off at work and started to head home. i slightly smelled a weird smell and thought it might be that rear brake that Matt (and the asshole cop from Marlbourgh - if you're a local, you'll know what i mean) said was smoking last Monday night, but the right mirror was angled down and i could see the wheel and it was fine. Still, the Jeep didn't seem to have quite the "uumph" and i was rolling at about 50 on I-44. i got off at the Vandeventer exit as usual. "Frost/Nixon" was playing at the Moolah just past JJ's and i could hang a left and go there, but it was a little too late (i hate walking in late) so i turned south to head home.
It's only about 100 feet from making the right on "Vennevenner" to making a left on Shaw to head up past the Garden and home. As i approached in the left turn lane, traffic was light but there was a minivan waiting to make a left and a couple of cars on-coming so i pushed the clutch and the brake. CRACK!! The brake pedal went a little limp which ain't good, so i veered into the right lane to go around him and then i started hearing other crunching and groaning and then as i passed him i felt the right sag and then saw the right wheel rolling ahead of me. The good thing is that at the upper right corner of this intersection is an island with a gazebo on it and a little ring road around it. So i headed for the far side of the island as the sparks flew and the axle housing made an agonizing screech as it etched the pavement. i was able to get it just far enough to get my ass out of the traffic lane before it came to a halt. The "Prodigal Wheel" - tire, hub and axle - wobbled around and came to rest at the left curb just 15 feet ahead of me.
i got out of the jeep and looked around. A few cars slowed down as i got out and asked if i needed any help. i just waved them off. i was amazingly calm and pulled out my phone. i had the tow truck on speed-dial and Bubba the truck driver was in and i said "come and get me, i'm just over the hill". He said he'd be there in 10. i just hung out and wait. A red-headed junior bullgoon fresh out of the academy rolled up. "i've got a tow truck on the way", i said and he just gave me a bored look and started punching my tags into his computer. What a dickhead. Didn't even get out of the car.
About that time, Bubba showed up across the intersection and he pulled backwards. When the truck pulled in, the cop didn't even get out of his car, but told Bubba to pull the jeep forward instead of blocking traffic to get it up. Then he left. Didn't even help. Gee, thanx. i was about to call Randy/redhochipe who i knew was off this week to come pic me up when Matt returned my call. He was itching to leave work anyway so he said he'd meet me at the garage. We hooked up the jeep and went over the hill to the shop.
Matt picked me up about 10 minutes later and we went home. As we walked up to the door, i saw a post-it on the stormdoor and knew it was the friggin' UPS guy. They don't deliver on Saturdays and i really wanted that package, too. "Shit, SHit, SHIT!!" i lost it and kicked the front door about five times. i went in and through my shit down and Matt just turned around and left. i was putting some stuff together and then about 15 minutes later, Matt walked in with my package. Seems he talks to the guy that comes to the office and knows how they work an area, so he followed the pattern until he caught up with him.
i may not have a car, but i've got the best husband in the world.