my name is...my name is...w-w-woofer
As-woofy-as-he-wanna-be reader and dear friend, soundbear69, replied to the post about how Matthew and i met:
"...I remember coming back into St. Louis in the winter of 2001. Matt was upset that everyone had picked up on your nickname. That was his special word for you. So, I remember that and that is why I call you by your first name...most of the time..."
OK, so it's not really a question, is it? But it begs a story that would interest our readers, i think."...why do they call you 'woofer'?"
The quick answer might be:"'Cause that's my name." And it is.
It's not just a screenname or online nick. i use this name on a daily basis. If i could use it at work, i would. And who knows...maybe in the future i will. But all my friends just call me 'woofer'...and you can too;i call you friend.
But soundbear69 has a point; Matthew had given me this little pet name after we met and was a bit upset when everyone started picking up on it. i have to admit, though, that i did nothing to stop them...i am probably even guilty of encouraging them. But its origins are a little unusual. Matthew wasn't into the whole "bear" thing, after all, so why would he start calling me 'woofer'? Well, i'll tell you...
This is kind of a companion piece to the story of how we met...just a little more detail. But it dovetails nicely.
Deep background fact: i never liked my name. Never. When i was a kid, it was always "Hey Donald Duck" or some shit. My aunt used to call me "Donny", but she was the only one who got away with it. And don't EVEN get me started on Donny Osmond. Being in the Army was great because it's all last names. Even if you're not using rank among friends it was always, "Hey Lamp'!!" (no one could ever pronounce my last name) It would bug me that civilians don't do last names; it's all "Joe, Tad, Buffy"...even if there is a boss/worker structure in place.
Just shy of five years ago, as you will recall, my whole life changed. i left my career, my friends, my home of 10 years, my lover of 6 years...EVERYthing!!...and moved back to STL. As that sage philosopher, David Bowie, might say, "A New Career In A New Town". i wanted a new name to go with my new life.
Some of the guys that were in the Happy Hour bunch might recall that i took to introducing myself as "DJ" since those were/are my actual initials. That didn't really catch hold very well either. What was i to do? Was i condemned to live out my life with my boring name?
Well, around the same time, everybody noticed that i used the phrase "WOOF"...a LOT!! This being a bear bar, everyone figured it was "a bear thing" and let it go. Actually, that had very little to do with it. It was actually a bleed over from the life i had just left behind.
As you may or may not know, my job in the Army was in the Military Police K-9 Corps. Dogs...bomb dogs, drug dogs, guard dogs. Years and years of working with dogs. Dogs that bark...loudly...resulting in my 15% hearing loss. So, dogs were pretty much my life.
Anyone who has seen an movie with any kind of military connection is probably familiar with the term "HOOHA!" This word has no proper spelling...and it cannot really be spelled the way it sounds. The second "H" is more of a "WH"...or more precisely, "HOO-AHH" with the HOO ascending in pitch and the AH thrown out like a whiplash. Anyway, this term was used mostly by the Airborne, SF, Infantry...the hard core Combat types. This was, of course, back in the day before everybody became a hardcore combat type, whether they wanted to or not. Granted, we did our bit too, but we had a lot of high-profile, garrison-type stuff too, so we weren't out in the field all the time. These were the men who used the phrase "HOOHA".
Well, them and posers. Wannabes. Assholes. You know the type. Try to make out like they're all hardcore and spend most of their day behind a desk. Their uniforms are starched to within an inch of their lives...but you can see where they missed pulling the tag off from the cleaners. Those types.
"HOOHA" is an all-purpose word. Actually, it's more than a word...it's a one-word language. It can be used as a battle-cry or cheer (the way you would normally hear it)...it can be used as a question (think of the way Scooby-Doo says "HUH?" and substitute "HOOHA" instead)...it can be used as a term of agreement...it can be used as a term of resignation when you know that a job is fucked up, but you're gonna suck it up and drive on and do it anyway ("hoo'ha"). As you can see, those who use this term use it alot!
Including the assholes. One such asshole was a Deputy Provost Marshal (think Assistant Chief of Police) we had. A real wannabe...no real job. This was back during the early days after i had taken over the section and we were still the bastard stepchildren of the department. i had no allies at the top...i was just promoted and they thought i would fold if they rode me hard enough. Thus, it was this asshole with no real job who decided to take it upon himself to try and make our lives as miserable as possible. He didn't really fall into our chain of command, but he would point out to the PM any infraction, no matter how small or meaningless, that my guys might have done. He had no real field experience, much less combat experience. He was a "ring-knocker", which means he went to West Point and would continually point it out by banging his academy ring on the desk or the arm of the chair...that made him feel superior to us who had, oh, i don't know, real-world experience?.
And he used the phrase "HOOHA"...a lot.
i won't lie, it was tough going for me in those early days. Not only was i getting it from the top down ("Your bunch of fuck-ups" was a phrase the Colonel was fond of using), but since i had gotten promoted over a bunch of guys who were SURE they were going to be promoted this time and had years more time in service than i had, they were not so subtle in their disappointment that their gig had been stolen from them...so they'd do just what they had to do...and then not that well. Time for me to grow up...quick.
However, i still kept my sense of humor and fought the good fight as best i could. And there were things that could be done to have some fun, break the tension and stick it to those who were, well, assholes. My best friend and drinking buddy, Jim (this would be Jim #3 for those of you keeping score at home), were talking one night over a rack of Stuttgarter Hoffbraus (beer in Germany comes in plastic racks instead of cases and the bottles are half-liters not 12 oz..."i only had 3 beers, honest!"), and the subject of LTC Pretentious and his constant use of the phrase "HOOHA". "Y'know", he said, "we could start doing it whenever he does it...kinda mocking or something." "Yeah", i said, "but we're not airborne, we're puppyfuckers...we should say 'WOOF' or something!" Seemed like a good idea at the time.
And so we took it upon ourselves to start using "WOOF!" like others would use "HOOHA!"...and we'd use it for everything! It was kinda funny at first. So much so, that we kept doing it...i guess me more than the others since i was around the asshole more than they were.
Time passed. The asshole was eventually reassigned along with other higher-ups that made me fight for every little thing. My section grew into the top section in Europe. i kept saying "WOOF".
What were once vices are now habits.
So here i was, starting my new life. i'd started to see Matthew more and more and was falling more and more. He started calling me "woofer" since i said "woof" so much...and, since we'd meet up with our friends at JJ's so much, others started calling me that too. Since redhochipe was still on his sabattical, i started staying on Fridays and Saturdays and helping Matthew barback which, obviously, led to my getting hired the following January. He called me "woofer"...everyone else followed suit.
i wanted a new name for my new life...and my new love had given me one and i wore it with pride. i still do. i always will.
Thank you, Matthew!
The gift that keeps on giving! LOWER CASE 'w', PLEASE. THANK YOU.
Still a little over a week to go to ask the unaskable (or unthinkable). i've still got a few questions to go...promise to get to them all.
WOOF!
"...I remember coming back into St. Louis in the winter of 2001. Matt was upset that everyone had picked up on your nickname. That was his special word for you. So, I remember that and that is why I call you by your first name...most of the time..."
OK, so it's not really a question, is it? But it begs a story that would interest our readers, i think."...why do they call you 'woofer'?"
The quick answer might be:"'Cause that's my name." And it is.
It's not just a screenname or online nick. i use this name on a daily basis. If i could use it at work, i would. And who knows...maybe in the future i will. But all my friends just call me 'woofer'...and you can too;i call you friend.
But soundbear69 has a point; Matthew had given me this little pet name after we met and was a bit upset when everyone started picking up on it. i have to admit, though, that i did nothing to stop them...i am probably even guilty of encouraging them. But its origins are a little unusual. Matthew wasn't into the whole "bear" thing, after all, so why would he start calling me 'woofer'? Well, i'll tell you...
This is kind of a companion piece to the story of how we met...just a little more detail. But it dovetails nicely.
Deep background fact: i never liked my name. Never. When i was a kid, it was always "Hey Donald Duck" or some shit. My aunt used to call me "Donny", but she was the only one who got away with it. And don't EVEN get me started on Donny Osmond. Being in the Army was great because it's all last names. Even if you're not using rank among friends it was always, "Hey Lamp'!!" (no one could ever pronounce my last name) It would bug me that civilians don't do last names; it's all "Joe, Tad, Buffy"...even if there is a boss/worker structure in place.
Just shy of five years ago, as you will recall, my whole life changed. i left my career, my friends, my home of 10 years, my lover of 6 years...EVERYthing!!...and moved back to STL. As that sage philosopher, David Bowie, might say, "A New Career In A New Town". i wanted a new name to go with my new life.
Some of the guys that were in the Happy Hour bunch might recall that i took to introducing myself as "DJ" since those were/are my actual initials. That didn't really catch hold very well either. What was i to do? Was i condemned to live out my life with my boring name?
Well, around the same time, everybody noticed that i used the phrase "WOOF"...a LOT!! This being a bear bar, everyone figured it was "a bear thing" and let it go. Actually, that had very little to do with it. It was actually a bleed over from the life i had just left behind.
As you may or may not know, my job in the Army was in the Military Police K-9 Corps. Dogs...bomb dogs, drug dogs, guard dogs. Years and years of working with dogs. Dogs that bark...loudly...resulting in my 15% hearing loss. So, dogs were pretty much my life.
Anyone who has seen an movie with any kind of military connection is probably familiar with the term "HOOHA!" This word has no proper spelling...and it cannot really be spelled the way it sounds. The second "H" is more of a "WH"...or more precisely, "HOO-AHH" with the HOO ascending in pitch and the AH thrown out like a whiplash. Anyway, this term was used mostly by the Airborne, SF, Infantry...the hard core Combat types. This was, of course, back in the day before everybody became a hardcore combat type, whether they wanted to or not. Granted, we did our bit too, but we had a lot of high-profile, garrison-type stuff too, so we weren't out in the field all the time. These were the men who used the phrase "HOOHA".
Well, them and posers. Wannabes. Assholes. You know the type. Try to make out like they're all hardcore and spend most of their day behind a desk. Their uniforms are starched to within an inch of their lives...but you can see where they missed pulling the tag off from the cleaners. Those types.
"HOOHA" is an all-purpose word. Actually, it's more than a word...it's a one-word language. It can be used as a battle-cry or cheer (the way you would normally hear it)...it can be used as a question (think of the way Scooby-Doo says "HUH?" and substitute "HOOHA" instead)...it can be used as a term of agreement...it can be used as a term of resignation when you know that a job is fucked up, but you're gonna suck it up and drive on and do it anyway ("hoo'ha"). As you can see, those who use this term use it alot!
Including the assholes. One such asshole was a Deputy Provost Marshal (think Assistant Chief of Police) we had. A real wannabe...no real job. This was back during the early days after i had taken over the section and we were still the bastard stepchildren of the department. i had no allies at the top...i was just promoted and they thought i would fold if they rode me hard enough. Thus, it was this asshole with no real job who decided to take it upon himself to try and make our lives as miserable as possible. He didn't really fall into our chain of command, but he would point out to the PM any infraction, no matter how small or meaningless, that my guys might have done. He had no real field experience, much less combat experience. He was a "ring-knocker", which means he went to West Point and would continually point it out by banging his academy ring on the desk or the arm of the chair...that made him feel superior to us who had, oh, i don't know, real-world experience?.
And he used the phrase "HOOHA"...a lot.
i won't lie, it was tough going for me in those early days. Not only was i getting it from the top down ("Your bunch of fuck-ups" was a phrase the Colonel was fond of using), but since i had gotten promoted over a bunch of guys who were SURE they were going to be promoted this time and had years more time in service than i had, they were not so subtle in their disappointment that their gig had been stolen from them...so they'd do just what they had to do...and then not that well. Time for me to grow up...quick.
However, i still kept my sense of humor and fought the good fight as best i could. And there were things that could be done to have some fun, break the tension and stick it to those who were, well, assholes. My best friend and drinking buddy, Jim (this would be Jim #3 for those of you keeping score at home), were talking one night over a rack of Stuttgarter Hoffbraus (beer in Germany comes in plastic racks instead of cases and the bottles are half-liters not 12 oz..."i only had 3 beers, honest!"), and the subject of LTC Pretentious and his constant use of the phrase "HOOHA". "Y'know", he said, "we could start doing it whenever he does it...kinda mocking or something." "Yeah", i said, "but we're not airborne, we're puppyfuckers...we should say 'WOOF' or something!" Seemed like a good idea at the time.
And so we took it upon ourselves to start using "WOOF!" like others would use "HOOHA!"...and we'd use it for everything! It was kinda funny at first. So much so, that we kept doing it...i guess me more than the others since i was around the asshole more than they were.
Time passed. The asshole was eventually reassigned along with other higher-ups that made me fight for every little thing. My section grew into the top section in Europe. i kept saying "WOOF".
What were once vices are now habits.
So here i was, starting my new life. i'd started to see Matthew more and more and was falling more and more. He started calling me "woofer" since i said "woof" so much...and, since we'd meet up with our friends at JJ's so much, others started calling me that too. Since redhochipe was still on his sabattical, i started staying on Fridays and Saturdays and helping Matthew barback which, obviously, led to my getting hired the following January. He called me "woofer"...everyone else followed suit.
i wanted a new name for my new life...and my new love had given me one and i wore it with pride. i still do. i always will.
Thank you, Matthew!
The gift that keeps on giving! LOWER CASE 'w', PLEASE. THANK YOU.
Still a little over a week to go to ask the unaskable (or unthinkable). i've still got a few questions to go...promise to get to them all.
WOOF!