blatantly ripped off from abby and sabra
In no particular order, list ten things you wish you could say to ten people:
1. I am really, really glad you got fat; your outside is finally starting to match your inside. If I could implant a chip in your brain that would keep you from sleeping at night by telling you how much you suck, I would. And I hope your liver rots from all the liquor you drink.
2. As much as I want to, I can never forgive you for what you did to me. When I reached my breaking point, you abandoned me. You absolutely hung me out to dry. I had no one else, and when I needed you most, you completely blew me off. Every day I regret moving out, even though I shudder to think of what would have become of me if I had stayed. I regret it because it ruined what we had, and I would give anything to be able to go back to the days when I could tell you anything and knew we would always be around to back eachother up. But you lost my trust and my respect, and as much as it hurts me to remain guarded, I know it would hurt more to go through it all again.
3. I understand your pain. I know what it's like to feel it pressing down on you and to know that nothing will be able to pull you out of it for longer than a few hours, minutes, or days at a time. I wish I could help you, because I have been there and it hurts. Watching you hurts me in a way that only watching someone who has suffered more than you can, and I wish you understood that I really do care, even though I don't speak it; I know that the best way to offer comfort is usually to say nothing at all because trying to rationalize it only makes it worse.
4. You married an idiot. I totally called that in like, fourth grade. Before the wedding. Big mistake. Now you're stuck with two pre-teen brats with no social skills and mad manners and a pathetic excuse for a dog. That's not even a dog; first of all, it's name is FLUFFY. Secondly, if you haven't noticed, it's a hairy rat with big ears. It looks like a mop. So much so, I want to shove a stick up its ass and rename it Swiffer. And if you are condescending towards my mother one more time, I swear to God I will break your nose and slash your tires.
5. I wish I was older so that I could be less of a niece and more of a friend when you need one.
6. When I told you a couple making out against the wall accidentally locked you in the bathroom last weekend, I lied. It was me. And it was intentional.
7. I know that you're dating her. Actually, just about everyone knows that you're dating her. We're not stupid. You can fess up to it- we don't care if you're gay, obviously, we only care that you're lying to us.
8. I'm really sorry I was a bitch to you in grade school. There's really no excuse for it; I don't even know why I did it. I was moody and obnoxious, and I took it out on you. I wish I could take it back.
9. I find you really, really attractive. Which is weird, but also unfortunate, because you're not single. But I'm leaving for five months, so maybe I'll find someone else who is more... well... my usual type.
10. As a general rule, you're not that enthused by me and I'm not that impressed by you. But at the same time, every time I see you... I wish you liked me. I wish I was faster or stronger or more coordinated so that you'd have a reason to show interest. When you're around, I just feel like a background player.
1. I am really, really glad you got fat; your outside is finally starting to match your inside. If I could implant a chip in your brain that would keep you from sleeping at night by telling you how much you suck, I would. And I hope your liver rots from all the liquor you drink.
2. As much as I want to, I can never forgive you for what you did to me. When I reached my breaking point, you abandoned me. You absolutely hung me out to dry. I had no one else, and when I needed you most, you completely blew me off. Every day I regret moving out, even though I shudder to think of what would have become of me if I had stayed. I regret it because it ruined what we had, and I would give anything to be able to go back to the days when I could tell you anything and knew we would always be around to back eachother up. But you lost my trust and my respect, and as much as it hurts me to remain guarded, I know it would hurt more to go through it all again.
3. I understand your pain. I know what it's like to feel it pressing down on you and to know that nothing will be able to pull you out of it for longer than a few hours, minutes, or days at a time. I wish I could help you, because I have been there and it hurts. Watching you hurts me in a way that only watching someone who has suffered more than you can, and I wish you understood that I really do care, even though I don't speak it; I know that the best way to offer comfort is usually to say nothing at all because trying to rationalize it only makes it worse.
4. You married an idiot. I totally called that in like, fourth grade. Before the wedding. Big mistake. Now you're stuck with two pre-teen brats with no social skills and mad manners and a pathetic excuse for a dog. That's not even a dog; first of all, it's name is FLUFFY. Secondly, if you haven't noticed, it's a hairy rat with big ears. It looks like a mop. So much so, I want to shove a stick up its ass and rename it Swiffer. And if you are condescending towards my mother one more time, I swear to God I will break your nose and slash your tires.
5. I wish I was older so that I could be less of a niece and more of a friend when you need one.
6. When I told you a couple making out against the wall accidentally locked you in the bathroom last weekend, I lied. It was me. And it was intentional.
7. I know that you're dating her. Actually, just about everyone knows that you're dating her. We're not stupid. You can fess up to it- we don't care if you're gay, obviously, we only care that you're lying to us.
8. I'm really sorry I was a bitch to you in grade school. There's really no excuse for it; I don't even know why I did it. I was moody and obnoxious, and I took it out on you. I wish I could take it back.
9. I find you really, really attractive. Which is weird, but also unfortunate, because you're not single. But I'm leaving for five months, so maybe I'll find someone else who is more... well... my usual type.
10. As a general rule, you're not that enthused by me and I'm not that impressed by you. But at the same time, every time I see you... I wish you liked me. I wish I was faster or stronger or more coordinated so that you'd have a reason to show interest. When you're around, I just feel like a background player.