The Life and Art of Bass Playing
The Life and Art of Bass Playing
by Tony Levin
In the beginning there was a bass. It was a Fender, probably a Precision,
but it could have been a Jazz - nobody knows. Anyway, it was very
old...definitely pre-C.B.S.
And God looked down upon it and saw that it was good. He saw that it was
very good in fact, and couldn't be improved on at all (though men would
later try,) And so He let it be and He created a man to play the bass.
and lo the man looked upon the bass, which was a beautiful 'sunburst red,
and he loved it. He played upon the open E string and the note rang through
the earth and reverberated throughout the firmaments (thus reverb came to
be.) And it was good. And God heard that it was good and He smiled at his
handiwork
Then in the course of time, the man came to slap upon the bass. And lo it
was funky.
And God heard this funkiness and He said, "Go man, go." and it was good.
And more time passed, and , having little else to do, the man came to
practice upon the bass. And lo, the man came to have upon him a great set of
chops. And he did play faster and faster until the notes rippled like a
breeze through the heavens.
And God heard this sound which sounded something like the wind, which He had
created earlier. It also sounded something like the movement of furniture,
which He hadn't even created yet, and He was not so pleased. And He spoke to
the man, saying "Don't do that!"
Now the man heard the voice of God, but he was so excited about his new
ability that he slapped upon the bass a blizzard of funky notes. And the
heavens shook with the sound, and the Angels ran about in confusion. (Some
of the Angels started to dance, but that's another story.)
And God heard this - how could He miss it - and lo He became Bugged. And He
spoke to the man, and He said, "Listen man, if I wanted Jimi Hendrix, I
would have created the guitar. Stick to the bass parts."
And the man heard the voice of God, and he knew not to mess with it. But now
he had upon him a passion for playing loud, fast and high. the man took the
frets off of the bass which God had created. And the man did slide his
fingers upon the fretless fingerboard and play melodies high upon the neck.
And, in his excitement, the man did forget the commandment of the Lord, and
he played a frenzy of high melodies and blindingly fast licks. And the
heavens rock with the assault and the earth shook, rattled and rolled.
Now God's wrath was great. And His voice was thunder as He spoke to the man.
And He said, "O.K. for you, pal. You have not heeded My word. Lo, I shall
create a soprano saxophone and it shall play higher than you can even think
of."
And from out of the chaos I shall bring forth the drums. And they shall play
so many notes thine head shall ache, and I shall make you to always stand
next to the drummer."
"You think you're loud? I shall create a stack of Marshall guitar amps to
make thin ears bleed. And I shall send down upon the earth other
instruments, and lo, they shall all be able to play higher and faster than
the bass."
"And for all the days of man, your curse shall be this; that all the other
musicians shall look to you, the bass player, for the LOW notes. And if you
play too high or fast all the other musicians shall say "WOW" but really
they shall hate it. And they shall tell you you're ready for your solo
career, and find other bass players for their bands. And for all your days
if you want to play your fancy licks you shall have to sneak them in like a
thief in the night."
"And if you finally do get to play a solo, everyone shall leave the
bandstand and go to the bar for a drink."
And it was so.
by Tony Levin
In the beginning there was a bass. It was a Fender, probably a Precision,
but it could have been a Jazz - nobody knows. Anyway, it was very
old...definitely pre-C.B.S.
And God looked down upon it and saw that it was good. He saw that it was
very good in fact, and couldn't be improved on at all (though men would
later try,) And so He let it be and He created a man to play the bass.
and lo the man looked upon the bass, which was a beautiful 'sunburst red,
and he loved it. He played upon the open E string and the note rang through
the earth and reverberated throughout the firmaments (thus reverb came to
be.) And it was good. And God heard that it was good and He smiled at his
handiwork
Then in the course of time, the man came to slap upon the bass. And lo it
was funky.
And God heard this funkiness and He said, "Go man, go." and it was good.
And more time passed, and , having little else to do, the man came to
practice upon the bass. And lo, the man came to have upon him a great set of
chops. And he did play faster and faster until the notes rippled like a
breeze through the heavens.
And God heard this sound which sounded something like the wind, which He had
created earlier. It also sounded something like the movement of furniture,
which He hadn't even created yet, and He was not so pleased. And He spoke to
the man, saying "Don't do that!"
Now the man heard the voice of God, but he was so excited about his new
ability that he slapped upon the bass a blizzard of funky notes. And the
heavens shook with the sound, and the Angels ran about in confusion. (Some
of the Angels started to dance, but that's another story.)
And God heard this - how could He miss it - and lo He became Bugged. And He
spoke to the man, and He said, "Listen man, if I wanted Jimi Hendrix, I
would have created the guitar. Stick to the bass parts."
And the man heard the voice of God, and he knew not to mess with it. But now
he had upon him a passion for playing loud, fast and high. the man took the
frets off of the bass which God had created. And the man did slide his
fingers upon the fretless fingerboard and play melodies high upon the neck.
And, in his excitement, the man did forget the commandment of the Lord, and
he played a frenzy of high melodies and blindingly fast licks. And the
heavens rock with the assault and the earth shook, rattled and rolled.
Now God's wrath was great. And His voice was thunder as He spoke to the man.
And He said, "O.K. for you, pal. You have not heeded My word. Lo, I shall
create a soprano saxophone and it shall play higher than you can even think
of."
And from out of the chaos I shall bring forth the drums. And they shall play
so many notes thine head shall ache, and I shall make you to always stand
next to the drummer."
"You think you're loud? I shall create a stack of Marshall guitar amps to
make thin ears bleed. And I shall send down upon the earth other
instruments, and lo, they shall all be able to play higher and faster than
the bass."
"And for all the days of man, your curse shall be this; that all the other
musicians shall look to you, the bass player, for the LOW notes. And if you
play too high or fast all the other musicians shall say "WOW" but really
they shall hate it. And they shall tell you you're ready for your solo
career, and find other bass players for their bands. And for all your days
if you want to play your fancy licks you shall have to sneak them in like a
thief in the night."
"And if you finally do get to play a solo, everyone shall leave the
bandstand and go to the bar for a drink."
And it was so.