Just random thoughts about stuff
There's likely nothing very profound in this, so if you're seeking insights or deeper meanings you're going to be disappointed. I'm going to ignore one of the major issues in my life, so that's off the stove too.
It was a long day selling ladders today. Just like yesterday. Nobody seems to want to buy one. Maybe it's the weather. There are two things wrong with the weather right now. First, it appears to be mostly sunny, and folks in Oregon don't really know what to do with that. Second, this is the week of the Rose Festival in Portland and that always means rain. We all know that better weather can't start until after the Grand Floral Parade, which is next Saturday, so we're doubly confused.
In western Oregon there are only two seasons, rainy and maybe not quite so rainy. We have, I must admit, now and then had something called "Summer" but it's not an every-year thing so we don't really expect it. The folks who work regular 8 to 5 jobs with weekends off always hope it will come on a weekend. Now and then their hopes are rewarded. A couple years ago it came on a Saturday, and then returned a week later on a Sunday for a reprise visit. Most people were completely baffled. A couple of the local cults declared this was clearly a sign of the end times and a bunch of people advertised their entire of collection of Mad magazine on Craigslist. I don't know if they sold.
Anyway, ladder sales were pretty much a wash out. When I got home I changed into some grubbier clothes and headed out to the Delta quadrant. I should probably explain that a little.
My yard is, unofficially, divided into four quadrants. That's because I vaguely remember from some math class back when that quadrants come in fours. I suppose you could have a fifth quadrant, but I think you have to use non-Euclidian geometry for than. That's kinda like imaginary numbers I think. You know, those numbers you use to convince yourself that you're actually going win Ohio when it's clear you can't. Personally, I wouldn't want to win Ohio. I'd rather win Washington, or maybe Buffalo, New York. I wouldn't mind winning the lottery, but that seems unlikely.
Anyway, to get back to the point at hand, I headed out to continue clearing the Delta quadrant. Why, you ask. Well, a couple years ago I managed to clear part of it. Last year I worked almost exclusively in the Gamma quadrant, and the weeds tried to reassert control in Delta, so before things got completely out of hand I thought I return and try to take over the whole area. I really want to be King of the Delta, even if that title doesn't have many perks.
Delta is where I built the Hobbit Hole. Not all my neighbors like that, but I'm okay with their complaints. Most of the time. Last night while I was working somebody stopped by to ask what I was going to do to it next. I probably should have gotten snarky, but I didn't. I'm not sure why. Maybe he just caught me off guard, or un-prepared.
To answer the questions neighbors had asked or suggested:
Yes, I have thought about placing a hobbit in the diorama. I'm not sure they make all-weather manikins, but I suspect they're not cheap. I could, I suppose, create one myself, but I don't really have the time. Actually, it's not that I don't have the time, it's more that I don't necessarily wish to spend the time doing that.
Yes, I have actually thought about making the chimney emit smoke. I could probably do that, although I think a small smoke machine is outside of my current budget, and I'm not sure how to protect it from the weather (see seasonal information above).
Now, nobody stopped by tonight, so I was left to ruminate about other things. Since I let my mind wander, it went several different places.
Jay Lake died. That's not a surprise since he had had cancer for some time. It wasn't unexpected, and he put up a wonderful fight to the very end. Now, if you don't know Jay you should look around for some of his books. He was a very creative author and an all-around decent human being. Although he lived here in Portland I only met him once. He had a really neat series of tattoos related to his battle with cancer. I'm even thinking about copying his idea. I have a total of 5 tattoos, but I'm afraid they're not very exciting. Just five little dots. They're there so I can be properly aligned for radiation treatments. Not too many people can claim those, and I don't know anybody who wants to. Anyway, that's what I've got.
Lots of guys got tattoos in the service, but it was suggested that we shouldn't. There was some fear that if we had a trident tattoo Charlie might make our incarceration really unpleasant when he discovered that. Given it wouldn't be much fun anyway, the idea of making it worse wasn't a real positive. Some guys did it anyway.
So...tattoos aside, Jay was a writer. I'd love to write like him. I try. When I'm sitting at my desk I can look out the window and see the Alpha quadrant. It's much different than the Delta. Alpha is more or less a forest, so the view is mostly trees, limbs, and the animals therein. A couple days ago I was watching and discovered that Intertree-80 was completely backed up. I'm not sure why, but the squirrels couldn't seem to move. Probably some construction project. The jays seemed upset too, although they might just have been mad at the squirrels. After all, the jays are sorta like motorcyclists...they just create a new lane somewhere if the existing one is blocked.
A little further over, on the wild cherry tree, a woodpecker was working. I don't know much about woodpeckers. This one had a bright red head, which I think makes him a male. I seem to recall that in the bird world the guys are the flashy dressers. So...maybe he's a red-headed woodpecker. He might be a pileated wood pecker, but I don't know about that. In fact, I have no idea what that means. Is it some sort of award that woodpeckers get? Do you have to peck a particular number of trees before you become pileated? Is there a badge or something you get when you become pileated?
Maybe it's some sort of honor thing, like a degree in Masonry. I have a friend who's a Mason, so I suppose I could ask him. He's probably not allowed to talk about it though. In his younger years he used to fly airplanes into hurricanes. I'm pretty sure you have to be pileated to do that. I think being drunk would help too, but I don't know much about that. He's never claimed he was pileated, but that may not be something you talk about publicly.
Anyway...back to the Delta quadrant. The area is largely dominated by blackberry vines and ivy. Other plants try to grow too, but they don't do real well. I got rid of a bunch of ivy and berries a couple years ago, but some of them returned, and I didn't get all of them in any case, so it's pretty much war down there. I also took down a holly tree that some bird planted years ago. It was a boy. Maybe you didn't know this, but holly trees have sexes. They're actually rather open about it. Only the girls have berries. I don't know if they have "sex" but they do have sexes. This was a boy. No berries. I saved the larger sections of stem...because the wood is really nice to work. It takes forever to dry out, and it's rather greasy, but it machines really well once it's dry, and it can look just like ivory...a translucent whitish-beige in color with very little evident grain. I don't think it's pileated, but I suppose it could be.
Since the Delta quadrant includes a rather major drainage course, the dirt in the lowest section is really neat stuff. That's part of the reason I decided it was the "delta" quadrant...because a big part of it is the alluvial fan from the drainage course. I only include that because I think alluvial is a really neat word. It's not cheap. It's a real $2.50 word, and I should get extra credit for using it. Mrs. Canon, my high school English teacher, would probably give me extra credit for that. Maybe I would even qualify for becoming pileated. I don't know for certain about that.
Downstairs in the shop the radio is on. I can hear it up here, and I need to get back down there. I have a bunch of work to get done, and there's a baseball game on. The Beavers and playing the Anteaters. No, I didn't make that up. They played yesterday and the Anteaters won. Since it's a double-elimination tournament, the Beavers played another game in the loser's bracket and won earlier today, so they play the Anteaters again. If the Beavers win, they'll play a third time tomorrow.
You might think a game between Beavers and Anteaters is kinda strange. I suppose it is. Actually, I thought the game between the Beavers and the Banana Slugs was stranger. That happened way back at the beginning of the season. The Beavers won. I'm wondering what a game between the Anteaters and the Banana Slugs would look like. I don't really know.
If the Beavers win this game, and then the one tomorrow they would advance to play in a Super Regional, which is kinda like a Regional just more super. I'm not sure, but I think playing in that Super thingy qualifies you towards being pileated, but maybe not. If you win that you get to go to Omaha, which is sort like that old thing that W C Fields used to explain...First Prize is a week in Philadelphia...Second Prize is two weeks in Philadelphia. I've been to Omaha. Other than baseball I don't think it's much of a prize. I think maybe you have to be pileated to go to Omaha. I think W C Fields was pileated a good portion of the time.
So...I think it's time to end this rant. I'm going to return to the shop and butcher some wood. I'll try to be careful so I don't get pileated. Somehow I just think that's got to hurt.
It was a long day selling ladders today. Just like yesterday. Nobody seems to want to buy one. Maybe it's the weather. There are two things wrong with the weather right now. First, it appears to be mostly sunny, and folks in Oregon don't really know what to do with that. Second, this is the week of the Rose Festival in Portland and that always means rain. We all know that better weather can't start until after the Grand Floral Parade, which is next Saturday, so we're doubly confused.
In western Oregon there are only two seasons, rainy and maybe not quite so rainy. We have, I must admit, now and then had something called "Summer" but it's not an every-year thing so we don't really expect it. The folks who work regular 8 to 5 jobs with weekends off always hope it will come on a weekend. Now and then their hopes are rewarded. A couple years ago it came on a Saturday, and then returned a week later on a Sunday for a reprise visit. Most people were completely baffled. A couple of the local cults declared this was clearly a sign of the end times and a bunch of people advertised their entire of collection of Mad magazine on Craigslist. I don't know if they sold.
Anyway, ladder sales were pretty much a wash out. When I got home I changed into some grubbier clothes and headed out to the Delta quadrant. I should probably explain that a little.
My yard is, unofficially, divided into four quadrants. That's because I vaguely remember from some math class back when that quadrants come in fours. I suppose you could have a fifth quadrant, but I think you have to use non-Euclidian geometry for than. That's kinda like imaginary numbers I think. You know, those numbers you use to convince yourself that you're actually going win Ohio when it's clear you can't. Personally, I wouldn't want to win Ohio. I'd rather win Washington, or maybe Buffalo, New York. I wouldn't mind winning the lottery, but that seems unlikely.
Anyway, to get back to the point at hand, I headed out to continue clearing the Delta quadrant. Why, you ask. Well, a couple years ago I managed to clear part of it. Last year I worked almost exclusively in the Gamma quadrant, and the weeds tried to reassert control in Delta, so before things got completely out of hand I thought I return and try to take over the whole area. I really want to be King of the Delta, even if that title doesn't have many perks.
Delta is where I built the Hobbit Hole. Not all my neighbors like that, but I'm okay with their complaints. Most of the time. Last night while I was working somebody stopped by to ask what I was going to do to it next. I probably should have gotten snarky, but I didn't. I'm not sure why. Maybe he just caught me off guard, or un-prepared.
To answer the questions neighbors had asked or suggested:
Yes, I have thought about placing a hobbit in the diorama. I'm not sure they make all-weather manikins, but I suspect they're not cheap. I could, I suppose, create one myself, but I don't really have the time. Actually, it's not that I don't have the time, it's more that I don't necessarily wish to spend the time doing that.
Yes, I have actually thought about making the chimney emit smoke. I could probably do that, although I think a small smoke machine is outside of my current budget, and I'm not sure how to protect it from the weather (see seasonal information above).
Now, nobody stopped by tonight, so I was left to ruminate about other things. Since I let my mind wander, it went several different places.
Jay Lake died. That's not a surprise since he had had cancer for some time. It wasn't unexpected, and he put up a wonderful fight to the very end. Now, if you don't know Jay you should look around for some of his books. He was a very creative author and an all-around decent human being. Although he lived here in Portland I only met him once. He had a really neat series of tattoos related to his battle with cancer. I'm even thinking about copying his idea. I have a total of 5 tattoos, but I'm afraid they're not very exciting. Just five little dots. They're there so I can be properly aligned for radiation treatments. Not too many people can claim those, and I don't know anybody who wants to. Anyway, that's what I've got.
Lots of guys got tattoos in the service, but it was suggested that we shouldn't. There was some fear that if we had a trident tattoo Charlie might make our incarceration really unpleasant when he discovered that. Given it wouldn't be much fun anyway, the idea of making it worse wasn't a real positive. Some guys did it anyway.
So...tattoos aside, Jay was a writer. I'd love to write like him. I try. When I'm sitting at my desk I can look out the window and see the Alpha quadrant. It's much different than the Delta. Alpha is more or less a forest, so the view is mostly trees, limbs, and the animals therein. A couple days ago I was watching and discovered that Intertree-80 was completely backed up. I'm not sure why, but the squirrels couldn't seem to move. Probably some construction project. The jays seemed upset too, although they might just have been mad at the squirrels. After all, the jays are sorta like motorcyclists...they just create a new lane somewhere if the existing one is blocked.
A little further over, on the wild cherry tree, a woodpecker was working. I don't know much about woodpeckers. This one had a bright red head, which I think makes him a male. I seem to recall that in the bird world the guys are the flashy dressers. So...maybe he's a red-headed woodpecker. He might be a pileated wood pecker, but I don't know about that. In fact, I have no idea what that means. Is it some sort of award that woodpeckers get? Do you have to peck a particular number of trees before you become pileated? Is there a badge or something you get when you become pileated?
Maybe it's some sort of honor thing, like a degree in Masonry. I have a friend who's a Mason, so I suppose I could ask him. He's probably not allowed to talk about it though. In his younger years he used to fly airplanes into hurricanes. I'm pretty sure you have to be pileated to do that. I think being drunk would help too, but I don't know much about that. He's never claimed he was pileated, but that may not be something you talk about publicly.
Anyway...back to the Delta quadrant. The area is largely dominated by blackberry vines and ivy. Other plants try to grow too, but they don't do real well. I got rid of a bunch of ivy and berries a couple years ago, but some of them returned, and I didn't get all of them in any case, so it's pretty much war down there. I also took down a holly tree that some bird planted years ago. It was a boy. Maybe you didn't know this, but holly trees have sexes. They're actually rather open about it. Only the girls have berries. I don't know if they have "sex" but they do have sexes. This was a boy. No berries. I saved the larger sections of stem...because the wood is really nice to work. It takes forever to dry out, and it's rather greasy, but it machines really well once it's dry, and it can look just like ivory...a translucent whitish-beige in color with very little evident grain. I don't think it's pileated, but I suppose it could be.
Since the Delta quadrant includes a rather major drainage course, the dirt in the lowest section is really neat stuff. That's part of the reason I decided it was the "delta" quadrant...because a big part of it is the alluvial fan from the drainage course. I only include that because I think alluvial is a really neat word. It's not cheap. It's a real $2.50 word, and I should get extra credit for using it. Mrs. Canon, my high school English teacher, would probably give me extra credit for that. Maybe I would even qualify for becoming pileated. I don't know for certain about that.
Downstairs in the shop the radio is on. I can hear it up here, and I need to get back down there. I have a bunch of work to get done, and there's a baseball game on. The Beavers and playing the Anteaters. No, I didn't make that up. They played yesterday and the Anteaters won. Since it's a double-elimination tournament, the Beavers played another game in the loser's bracket and won earlier today, so they play the Anteaters again. If the Beavers win, they'll play a third time tomorrow.
You might think a game between Beavers and Anteaters is kinda strange. I suppose it is. Actually, I thought the game between the Beavers and the Banana Slugs was stranger. That happened way back at the beginning of the season. The Beavers won. I'm wondering what a game between the Anteaters and the Banana Slugs would look like. I don't really know.
If the Beavers win this game, and then the one tomorrow they would advance to play in a Super Regional, which is kinda like a Regional just more super. I'm not sure, but I think playing in that Super thingy qualifies you towards being pileated, but maybe not. If you win that you get to go to Omaha, which is sort like that old thing that W C Fields used to explain...First Prize is a week in Philadelphia...Second Prize is two weeks in Philadelphia. I've been to Omaha. Other than baseball I don't think it's much of a prize. I think maybe you have to be pileated to go to Omaha. I think W C Fields was pileated a good portion of the time.
So...I think it's time to end this rant. I'm going to return to the shop and butcher some wood. I'll try to be careful so I don't get pileated. Somehow I just think that's got to hurt.