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[wontwork4shiit]

Today I started thinking about something that I hadn't in about 2 years or so. Granted, it was prompted by something amy said, but thats ok. I started to think about my parents divorce and just how awful the whole ordeal was, and the shitty outcome, and how I still havent fully accepted the fact that things will never go back to the way they were,

Comments

never betray the way you've always known it is...

[pinkbul1ets]

i don't think you can fully see how much I love your family. I mean, considering how little time (in the long run of time, or in almost any human sense of it) I have spent with your family and how much I already feel at home with them says a lot. I guess I have just never felt so accepted and welcome into people's lives who really didn't know me like the way your family did, on every end. I could not comprehend how they put up with me sleeping on their floor without being pissed off every day about it, so I figured they must internally be sick of me, but even as I tried to see that I could no find it. And that blew my mind. I dunno, it's just so amazing to me what your family has unconsciously done for me, and I would be crushed to know that you couldn't see it. And, yeah, I mean, I do care that much, I care more than just those words because I really got the feeling that even when things are hell with my family, I had another place where I could belong. And that was the first time I had felt that in a loooong time. And it was so great. So, I mean, I guess I needed you to know everything I know, because I am so grateful to finally feel like there is a place where I can be again and feel safe. During highschool all the way until I graduated, I lost all of those sacred places I once had, and now knowing that there is at least one place I can go, I just don't know if you can understand how much that means to me. Even though as I write this, I almost find the concept ridiculous because logically, how can I think that your family would accept me like that? but then again I think, well, that's how I feel and that's what's important. Do you see what I am saying?

one day I'll be wondering how, I got so old just wondering how, never got cold wearing nothing in the snow.

Re: never betray the way you've always known it is...

[wontwork4shiit]

and just as much as you love my family, they love you. after you left my mom and grandma would always ask where you were, cuz i guess they thought you were comming back or with kristin or something.. and it was so sad.. because id be like.. uh.. shes in chicago! and they would say.. o, im sorry.. are you sad? and id get pissed off and be like.. YEAH!

i dont know. it was amazing to me how you just fit in with my fam. and your a HUGE part of my life, so how would they not just let you in? But that makes me soo happy that you feel like you have that place that you know is always going to be there and you can go to and automatically feel loved and wanted... and what makes it more special is.. its my house! And let me tell you... you can ALWAYS STAY THERE.. like even if for some reason I wasnt there.. you would always be welcome. I did underestimate how much you love them, because to me we are so not the normal family and have so many problems and fierce history. So the fact that you could see past that and see the true people they really are means... god, i cant even express it.. because most people cannot. I LOVE YOU!