(no subject)
WARNING! IMPENDING RANT:
34 days is a very long time. it's an especially long time if you are absolutely screaming to get out. it's an outrageously long time if the only thing left that is both a) something you enjoy and b) something that is not disturbingly unhealthy is running. it's a pretty damn long time if even though you know in your heart that you really care about your friends at home, for some reason just the fact that they're them and not who you guiltily wish they were makes you hate them. it's an awfully long time if you feel like that is how long it will take to find someone who loves you. it's soooo long because right now, even though everything's ok, i just want to get out so i can really be happy again. i rationalize and i rationalize with myself. it's actually just fine. almost no homework, friends in all my classes. i'm doing pretty well. nothing horrible is happening....but every morning i wake up and i wish i hadent. i put on silver bay music and look through hundreds of pictures...over and over and over and it is SO BAD and i know i should totally get a life but the weird thing is, i DO have a life. i mean i do all sorts of things. i run, i work (even if it is once a week), i have jazz band which is wonderful and i have art and textile clubs, and i go to meeting on sundays, and...actually i just read that again and realized it is absolutely nothing.
qu'est-ce que le point?
34 days is a very long time. it's an especially long time if you are absolutely screaming to get out. it's an outrageously long time if the only thing left that is both a) something you enjoy and b) something that is not disturbingly unhealthy is running. it's a pretty damn long time if even though you know in your heart that you really care about your friends at home, for some reason just the fact that they're them and not who you guiltily wish they were makes you hate them. it's an awfully long time if you feel like that is how long it will take to find someone who loves you. it's soooo long because right now, even though everything's ok, i just want to get out so i can really be happy again. i rationalize and i rationalize with myself. it's actually just fine. almost no homework, friends in all my classes. i'm doing pretty well. nothing horrible is happening....but every morning i wake up and i wish i hadent. i put on silver bay music and look through hundreds of pictures...over and over and over and it is SO BAD and i know i should totally get a life but the weird thing is, i DO have a life. i mean i do all sorts of things. i run, i work (even if it is once a week), i have jazz band which is wonderful and i have art and textile clubs, and i go to meeting on sundays, and...actually i just read that again and realized it is absolutely nothing.
qu'est-ce que le point?