be cool
It's so strange how you can sometimes affect people's lives without even noticing. Without doing anything specific. Just by being what you are - perhaps even while hating yourself for not being capable of anything more.
When you get thank-yous and wonder sincerely what they're for.
Nothing. They're just because you look like you do, smile like you do. Because of the moments where you appear strong - and all the times you look as awkward as you possibly can.
Affection towards you. The most impossible thing in the world.
It lives independently from any of your thoughts and inner fears, it doesn't care how you feel about yourself or whether you feel like you deserve it. It's just there.
I'm not implying you should stop struggling for self-perfection. It's just so damn amazing to stop and look back sometimes.
When you get thank-yous and wonder sincerely what they're for.
Nothing. They're just because you look like you do, smile like you do. Because of the moments where you appear strong - and all the times you look as awkward as you possibly can.
Affection towards you. The most impossible thing in the world.
It lives independently from any of your thoughts and inner fears, it doesn't care how you feel about yourself or whether you feel like you deserve it. It's just there.
I'm not implying you should stop struggling for self-perfection. It's just so damn amazing to stop and look back sometimes.