Collide 3/?
Title: Collide 3/?
Author: Maggsie! (me)
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: Emily/JJ
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Unfortunately I do not own any of the characters
AN: Thank you for all the amazing comments!
AN2: I want to thank Darkbard0 being a kick ass beta and being my inspiration.
Summary: When tragedy strikes on a day out, what will it mean for Emily and JJ's growing friendship?
x x x
Emily wasn't the kind of person that panicked easily. She had grown up with her Mother telling her that staying calm was the best approach to take in any situation. And that's what she'd done, she would compartmentalize things that worried her or would distract her from her work, it was even one of the first things JJ had noticed about her. The blonde had observed her tendencies to story things away, withdraw emotion, and deal with the scenario before her. She remained calm to utilise her full capacity, her senses and instincts. However, this was something that she could not stay calm for.
Emily began to feel the panic rising in her like hot bile being forced upward, threatening to burn her from the inside out, and force tears to overflow from her stinging eyes. But she would not break down, she had to ignore it, she had to stay strong.
"Henry?! Henry where are you?!"
She shouted, her voice echoing dully inside her head as she searched the area around her frantically. The woman that had just complimented Emily on Henry had disappeared and it didn't take much even in her state of panic for her to come to the conclusion that she had most likely taken him. Whirling around, she noticed that the woman that had been shouting about her missing son had also vanished in to thin air.
Her heart pounded so heavily against her chest that Emily thought she was on the verge of passing out. Her head was thick and sluggish as the fear pumped through her blood like a poison. Her mouth and throat became dry, so dry it was like having razor blades inside. That hot sticky bile churned in her stomach, and the brunette was desperately trying not to lurch over and throw the contents of it into the nearest trashcan. She had never been so scared in her life, not even when her own life had been threatened.
She had to remember. She blinked harshly to try and clear her head, she had to remember these details. That woman's face. But she recognised the familiar initial signs of shock seeping in. If she let herself fall completely Emily was scared she wouldn't remember, and then what good would she be to Henry?
She was right next to the toy store, and that was her first stop. She ran in, searching each aisle that was filled with toys. She was getting a few odd glances, and she could feel the tears welling up. All of a sudden a flash of blonde caught her eye and she went towards it, turning the little boy around. Seeing the shock on his face, she realised it wasn't him, and looked up to the woman who was most probably his mother.
"I'm so sorry. I've lost a little boy, have you seen him? He looks like your son."
Shaking her head, the woman put her hand on the boy's shoulder, turning him around and walking off with him away from Emily. Taking a deep breath, she looked through the rest of the store, and stopped when she realised he wasn't in there. A tear slid down her cheek, and she furiously wiped it away, running out the store and back to where she had first come from.
She had begun to shake now, trembling as the space of the mall twisted and contorted before her eyes. She was hot and dizzy, yes. And she tried to blink as everything began to loom over her, the space seemingly stretching out making her recognise that this was such a massive place for one tiny little boy to be lost.
"Henry?!"
Emily screamed, echoing both in the mall and her head. The brunette could feel all eyes boring in to her, no-one was approaching her so she set off again, going to a woman who was just staring at her. Stopping in front of the older woman, her worried eyes met that of concerned blue eyes.
"Have you seen a little boy? He's 4 years old with blonde hair and bright blue eyes. Have you seen him?"
The woman shook her head sadly, and Emily let out a sigh before turning around to meet all the other stares. Seeing an empty bench, she stood on it, looking over the crowds to see if she could see Henry. But he was nowhere in sight. Knowing she had everyone's attention she made an attempt at getting any information she could.
"Has anyone seen my son?!"
She didn't even notice she had called Henry her son, as she was met with a number of shaking heads. Emily took a minute to catch her breath, keeping an eye out for anything that didn't seem right. A security guard caught her eye, and she ran towards him, getting her FBI badge out her back pocket as she did. She knew she was going to have to use it.
The middle aged man turned towards her as she approached him, looking her up and down blatantly. And any other time she would have had something to say about him checking her out, but she had much more important things to worry about. Her little boy was lost and she had to find him. The cases began to filter through her mind, all those child cases she had worked. It made her feel sicker, that sludge in her stomach twisting and turning painfully. She had to think, she had to act and not react. She had to get control of this situation, for his sake.
"A little boy has gone missing; I think he's been snatched!"
Emily informed him immediately, slightly out of breath as the adrenaline that had been pumping through her body started to drift away, as the worry set in. As the adrenaline drifted away from her, Emily felt her body go from hot to cold, leaving her not just trembling but shivering. Her heart still pounded against her chest, creating an overbearing booming of blood inside her ears. It was disorientating, and t left her feeling weak. It was one of the very few times that Emily had actually felt helpless. All she wanted was to go back a few minutes, and have everything as it was. Have Henry holding her hand, chattering away sweetly as they went to the toy store.
But he was gone, and no one had seen a damn thing. And with every second passing, Emily was becoming aware it was chance for the would be abductor to get away. Or Henry to roam further on his own. But her gut was telling her that the former wasn't the scenario at play here. So as she looked at the 'security guard', he just looked back at her like she was deranged and Emily felt like punching him.
"He's 4, he was with me, I only looked away for a second, and he was gone! I need you to shut down the mall and keep everyone currently here inside, locked in."
The profiler choked out, managing to at least kick start the part of her brain that could get things into action, though the emotion coming through to her voice thickly as she struggled to get the words out. It was as though some part of her, right at the back of her mind, was screaming at her to move, to be the Agent she was, but that part of her was trapped by an invisible wall of pain and fear and terror. But both parts of her were ready to tear the guards head off his shoulders as the guy raised his eyebrows at her, a look that stupidly asked 'and why would I do that?'
"Look, I'm an FBI agent, now shut down the damn mall and call the police!"
Emily shouted angrily, as she shoved her FBI badge at him. Intimidated by the death glare she was sending him, as well as the badge she was wielding, he put his hands up in surrender, and got his phone out, obviously phoning the manager of the mall. She watched him intently, though his words dully echoed as she tried to breathe, but in the next minute she heard a tannoy go out over the whole mall, telling everyone not to panic but the mall was going to be closed down for a little while. Seeing him on the phone again, this time obviously to the police, the brunette nodded her thanks, and she turned around, hearing everyone murmuring under their breaths and looking at her again, knowing it was down to her why they were locked in.
Her mind was groggy and she was struggling to think straight. She couldn't think like a profiler, she couldn't think like an FBI agent, she was thinking like a distraught parent. But she couldn't help it, Henry meant everything to her, and she would do anything to see his happy, smiley face right now. But he didn't appear, and now Emily let the tears fall down her cheeks, not knowing where to start.
Then it hit her like a lightning bolt, she had to let JJ know. How was she supposed to tell the woman she wanted to be with that her son was missing? How was she supposed to tell her that she had taken her eyes off Henry for a few seconds? Thinking back, Emily knew she should have never let go of Henry's hand, that maybe if she hadn't, he would have been with her right now. The brunette put her hand over her mouth, as she started to sob. How was she going to be able to this?
Pulling her phone out of her pocket, she stared at it, her hand shaking, and she couldn't get it to keep still. She didn't want to make the phone call, she didn't want to tell JJ that she had lost her son, but she had to. JJ deserved to know what was going on, she was his mother. Pressing speed dial 2, she put the phone to her ear the dread building inside her. She listened to it ring and ring, with no answer. Ending the call, she knew that JJ was in a meeting with Strauss and Hotch. She obviously had it on silent, but she knew that Hotch always kept his on even if he was in a meeting. She called, and listened to it ring a couple of times before he picked up.
"Agent Hotchner."
"Hotch, it's Prentiss. Is JJ with you?"
She said quickly, not wanting to beat around the bush. JJ needed to be here, and the team would be able to help. Emily didn't want to think about the fact that the longer she kept talking, the longer Henry was missing. She knew all about the statistics through Reid, but the profiler was desperately trying to shut them out. Henry was going to be okay, she was going to make sure of it.
"Yeah, she is. Do you want to talk to her?"
She nodded, but then she realised that he couldn't see her. She took a deep breath, trying to keep her composure, so he wouldn't be able to hear it in her voice. JJ had to be the first one to know.
"Yes please."
"Now really isn't a good time-"
"Hotch, just hand the damn phone over to JJ!"
Emily shouted, and then she heard some muffled voices, obviously Hotch telling Strauss that JJ had to leave the meeting. He wasn't stupid; he knew that if Emily was interrupting, it was for something very important and not just chit chat. A couple of minutes passed, before she heard gentle breathing on the other end of the phone, and then the voice she loved so much filtered through.
"Hey you.
"JJ..."
"Thank you so much for giving me a break from Strauss. And it's really nice to hear your voice."
The brunette choked on her words, at the gentleness of JJ's voice. Another tear rolled down her cheek, and she bit back the emotion. She didn't want to startle the blonde, she wanted to do it as gently as possible. But she couldn't, she knew they were on a time limit. They needed to be there as fast as possible.
"JJ, you need to come to the mall, right now."
"Why? Emily what's going on?"
She could hear the worry coming through in JJ's voice, and she hated that she was the one that had to tell her what she was about to. That her boy, her baby that she had made, had gone missing.
"Please JJ, just come to the mall. And bring the team too."
"Emily, tell me what the hell is going on!"
The sterner voice startled Emily, and she had to take a few seconds to compose herself. But it was obviously too long, as JJ brought her out of the state she was in.
"Emily!"
Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes as she prepared to deliver the heart breaking news.
"Henry's missing JJ."
She was met with silence. There was no gentle breaths, no murmuring, no crying, no nothing, and Emily wasn't sure what to say next. Was she allowed to try and comfort JJ seeing as it was her that had lost him? She didn't know how to react; it was completely different from having a case with the same situation. This was personal; this was someone she knew, someone she loved. How was she supposed to be professional?
"Emily?"
Hotch's voice wasn't the one that she had been expecting, and she took a deep breath, not wanting to think about how JJ was reacting.
"Where's JJ?"
"She's right here. What's going on?"
"You need to come to mall Hotch. Henry's gone missing, and I'm pretty sure that he's been taken."
Emily explained, as calmly as she possibly could. She watched as she saw the police enter the mall, and she almost let out a sigh of relief that she finally had some help. They would be objective, they wouldn't let personal matters cloud their judgement of what should happen next.
"Hotch, the police have just arrived and the manager has shut down the mall for me, so everyone who was here when he went missing should still be here."
"Okay Emily, we'll be right there."
Hanging up, Emily put the phone back in her pocket, and walked towards the police who were looking around at everyone. They all turned towards her, as she approached them, showing them her FBI badge in the process. The senior most looking officer stepped forward, and Emily walked with him away from the rest of them.
"I'm Deputy Superintendent Spencer Goole. Do you want to tell me what happened?"
They stopped, and the brunette turned to face the police officer, tears glistening in her eyes. She had never been this emotional before, and she hated to appear weak. But this was Henry, that's all there was to it.
"Sure, I'm SSA Emily Prentiss. I was with Henry, who is the little boy that's gone missing. I think I have a picture somewhere."
She pulled her purse out of her pocket, and opened it to reveal a recent picture of Henry. Emily pulled it out, and handed it to the police officer.
"He's 4, and we were going to the toy store. Anyway, this woman came over and complimented me on Henry, and as we were talking, this other woman came running through the crowds, shouting that she'd lost her son. I turned around, and when I looked back, he was gone."
Emily explained, not stopping to take much of a breath.
"Can you remember what the woman looked like who spoke to you?"
"Yeah, she was a middle aged woman, about 45 I would say. She had mousy brown hair, about shoulder length, and brown eyes. I can see her face clearly in my mind, I'll never forget it. Henry's mother will be here very soon."
The police officer nodded, and turned away from her walking back to the rest of them. Emily shuffled on her feet, not knowing exactly what she should do. She felt herself relax a little bit when she saw the rest of the team walk in, including Garcia. She looked at JJ, who she could visibly see had been crying, and she could feel the emotion welling up inside her again. They spotted her almost right away, and walked over to her. JJ came right to her side, and took hold of her hand, gripping it tightly. All Emily could feel was guilt.
"Emily, what happened?"
Hotch asked staunchly, more serious than ever, and the brunette didn't want to go through what had happened again, but they needed to hear too.
"Um, we were going to the toy store, and this woman stopped us, I only let go of his hand for a second."
As quickly as JJ gripped her hand, she pulled it away again, stepping away from her quickly. Emily turned to her, the devastation showing in both of their eyes. JJ had trusted her and right now she felt like she had failed her so profoundly, so miserably, that the damage would forever be irreparable.
"You let go of his hand?"
JJ spat out in accusation. Never in a million years did she think Emily would ever make such a careless mistake. Sure, kids were hard to keep hold of sometimes but in the middle of a crowded mall, what the hell was she thinking? How could she be so damn reckless with her baby? This was supposed to be a good day. They were supposed to be going somewhere, and Henry was supposed to be waiting for her when she got to the mall. He was supposed to jump and climb all over her as he babbled about his day and showed her everything he had done. Instead he was out there, with a fucking stranger. All thanks to Emily.
The brunette took a deep breath, nodding was the only thing she could do. JJ didn't need to say everything she was thinking; she could see it clearly in those terrified and furious blue eyes. It made her numb.
"How could you? You know what the hell happens, what we see on the job!"
The blonde berated, beginning to get upset again. She had seized up on hearing Emily's words over the phone, and her body could literally feel it now. It wouldn't relax, and her heart wouldn't relax from its contorted and twisted position. She couldn't breathe, not without her son. Not when she knew he wasn't safe. If anything happened to him JJ honestly thought she'd die. She'd just stop living, because he was her life. They were connected. He was in her soul, laced into her very being. He was made of her, and she could feel it. And it felt, right now, that she was being ripped apart, the invisible tears in her flesh killing her inch by inch.
JJ had never trusted anyone with Henry like she did Emily, not even his own Father. And right now she was regretting that with her whole self.
"I know. I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry."
Emily went to step towards the blonde, but JJ stepped back again, and the profiler let the tears fall again at the rejection. All she could do was watch as JJ walked away towards the police. It was all her fault.