A Little Off the Top (3/?)
Chapter 3 behind the cut.
"Girl, work your magic!" Jubilee says as she plops down on the chair in front of me and opens up a copy of Star magazine. "I wanna do something different. Still elegant and classy, but like, you know, with a twist."
"Why do you always have to do something "different" and twisted?" Bobby says without looking up from his phone. He's sitting over by the window on a giant beanbag chair, hair freshly trimmed thanks to yours truly.
"First of all, I said 'with a twist'," replies Jubilee. "And second of all, it's because I'm one of a kind, baby. We can't all be vanilla, now can we, Snowflake?"
Bobby rolls his eyes but smiles, continuing to play games on his phone. Kitty comes out of the bathroom, hair all rolled up in curlers.
"What about a French braid, only wrapping around your head like a wreath or something, instead of straight down the back?" Kitty suggests.
"Eh, I don't know about that," says Jubilee doubtfully.
I stand there and tap my chin for a moment. "How about two poufy buns, up high where pigtails would be, with skinny braids criss-crossing in the back and some gems?"
"YES! That sounds awe-sommme!" Jubilee sings.
"Alright then, sugar. Sit back and let me work my magic."
Just then there is a knock at the door. "I come bearing pizza and candy," says a deep voice with a Russian accent.
"Peter!" Kitty exclaims, prancing to the door and swinging it open.
"Hello again, my kotonok. I missed you," Peter says before nuzzling noses with Kitty.
"You two are so cute together," Jubilee complains humorously. "It's disgusting."
"Yeah, really. It's been seriously 5 minutes since you last saw each other," Bobby adds.
"Whatever, you're all just jealous," Kitty says as she puts the pizza and candy on the big ottoman. The boys start digging into the food while Kitty hands Jubilee a slice on a plate.
"Oh yeah, totally jealous," says Jubilee.
I look around the room and smile to myself. Here we are, adults in our twenties, and we're hanging out in Jubilee's room on a Friday afternoon eating pizza and goofing off like a bunch of teenagers. It's just like old times. The only thing missing now is--
"Ooo, you know what we really need?" Jubilee says. "We need some adult refreshment." Yep. Right on cue as always, Jubes.
"Jubes, it's 1 o'clock in the afternoon," Kitty reminds her.
"Pfftt. So? I'm not looking to get hammered. But it's been a long-ass week for all of us. I think we deserve a little something, don't we guys?"
"I second that," Bobby agrees.
"Third," says Peter.
"Amen to that," I chime in. "This morning's Danger Room session was brutal. My neck is still killing me."
"I know!" groans Jubilee. "That was rough. Cyke was relentless with those Sentinel drills. I thought I was gonna die from sheer exhaustion."
"Where are we going to get alcohol right now?" Kitty asks, hands on her hips. "This is a school, after all."
The rest of us exchange "the look", and then all eyes turn on Kitty. Her eyes widen with realization. "Oh, no. No way." She crosses her arms.
"C'mon, Kittyyy," Jubilee says in a sing-song tone. "We're thirsty..."
"I'm not doing it."
"Yeah, c'mon, Kitty." Bobby makes a sad puppy face. "So...thirsty..." he says, coughing and sputtering like a man dying of thirst in the desert.
"No!" Kitty sighs in protest, but her resolve is already weakening. "I haven't done it ages. What if it's not in the same place? What if I get caught? He is the world's most powerful telepath, after all."
"Oh my God, Kitty. Are you seriously worried that you'll get in trouble or something?" Jubilee laughs. "We're not kids anymore."
"Well...no," Kitty falters. "But can you imagine how embarrassing it would be if I did get caught? I mean, we are adults and all, but still. Plus, it's the middle of the day. I've only ever done it at night."
"Where's your sense of adventure, Shadowcat?" I question her as I take a bobby pin from my mouth and secure one of the buns on Jubilee's head. "You're supposed to be the queen of stealth. And besides, the Professor is going to be all over the mansion supervising preparations for the ball. He's probably nowhere near his office. C'mon, Shadowcat, live up to your name. Use your powers for the greater good."
Kitty looks to Peter, who shrugs his shoulders and smiles. "It's up to you, my kitten. Could be fun."
"C'mon, Shadowcat! Shadowcat, Shadowcat," Bobby chants, and then Jubes and I join in. "Shadowcat, Shadowcat!"
"Ugh, fine," Kitty concedes with a roll of her eyes.
"Yeah!" we all hoot and cheer.
She takes off her robe, already wearing a black t-shirt and leggings. Peter follows as she walks over to the one side of the room and faces the section of wall between the bookcase and the nightstand.
Purely by accident, we discovered years ago that Jubilee's room is directly above the professor's study; and in fact, this particular wall and this particular spot is directly above his liquor cabinet. We've gotten into some crazy hijinks over the years, but busting into the Professor's stash was probably the riskiest thing we ever did.
I always wondered if the Professor knew what we were up to, but he never let on that he knew anything. Back then we always thought, in our over inflated teenage confidence, that we were just that good. Who knows? Maybe we were that good. Or maybe, I muse, he did know what we were up to, but let us get away with it because we were bonding, working together as a team; sort of like preparation for being future X-men. Would he do that? Nah...
Kitty rolls her shoulders and shakes her hands loosely like she is preparing for a fist fight, or a sprint. Jubilee and I look at each other with amused grins. Bobby has gone downstairs to check the Professor's door and stand as lookout.
Gracefully, like a skilled gymnast, Kitty bends forward and places her hands on the floor, then elevates her feet straight into the air, toes pointed, performing a perfect handstand. Peter grasps her ankles and looks to me for the signal. My phone alerts me to a text message from Bobby: Woodchuck to Grey Squirrel. The Eagle is clear for landing. I chuckle and nod to Peter.
"Ready, my love?"
Kitty blows out a puff of air. "Ready. I'll wiggle my toes when I need you to pull me back up."
Peter begins to slowly lower Kitty into the floor. First her head disappears, then her shoulders. She's down to her waist when she puts up her index finger, indicating that Peter needs to pause. I can just imagine what this must look like from the floor below us; the top of her head peeking through the ceiling, then two eyes, peering back and forth. The view from up here is equally as bizarre; it's a little jarring to see half of Kitty's body phased through the floor with only her legs showing. I don't think I'll ever get used to that.
After a moment, Kitty gives the thumbs up, and Peter begins lowering her further into the floor. Soon she's down to her ankles. We hold our breaths and wait. Ten seconds later, Kitty wiggles her toes, ready to be pulled back up.
Just then, there is a knock at the door. "Jubilee?" Crap. It's Jean.
"Um, yeah?" Jubilee calls out, and looks at me with big eyes. Peter freezes, while Kitty continues wiggling her toes impatiently.
"Is Rogue in there with you? I need to speak with her."
"Uh, yeah, I'm here, Jean. Just a sec." I motion for Peter to get Kitty out of the floor. He yanks her up quickly and the bottle of liquor slips out of her hand and goes flying. It makes a loud clanking noise as it crashes into the lamp and bounces off the floor. Thank God there was a soft rug there to break the fall. That could have been disastrous.
Jubilee covers her mouth and suppresses a snicker, while Kitty straightens out her clothes and gives Peter a 'What the hell?' look. Peter puts his finger to his mouth to tell Kitty to hush and picks up the bottle, stashing it under the bed pillow.
Trying to act casual, I walk to the door and open it calmly. "What's up, Jean?"
"Hey," Jean smiles warmly. "You weren't in your room, so I thought you might be here. I just wanted to let you know that Professor wants us to do a routine pick-up tonight after the ball, so we need to be ready to fly."
"Oh! Ok. I'll be ready. Who's going with us?"
"Well, it's nothing too crazy tonight; it's a teenage runaway, no FOH or anything like that, so it'll be just us and the new girl, Angelica."
"The new Physics teacher?" I say with mild surprise. "Firestar, right?"
"Yes, that's right," Jean confirms. "The Professor thought it would be a good idea for her to get her feet wet with an easy mission before getting into the heavier stuff."
"Yeah, probably a good idea," I agree.
"Ok, great, so I'll see you later, Rogue," Jean says, turning to go.
"See you later," I reply.
Jean stops and turns back to me for a moment. "Oh, one more thing." She reaches for something just outside the door then hands me a six-pack of ginger beer and a bag of limes. "The Professor said to be sure you replace his Grey Goose the next time you're out, preferably by the end of the week."
Bobby arrives at the door and screeches to a halt when he sees Jean. She winks and gives me a coy smile before heading down the hall. "Have fun," she calls out behind her.
I turn around on my heel, holding the ginger beer and limes up, while Bobby closes the door behind me. For a moment we all look at each other, speechless. Jubilee sputters and we all burst out laughing.
"Well then. I guess we weren't as good as we thought we were," I say, biting my lip. "Damn telepaths."
"That sly old dog!" Jubilee exclaims with a smile.
"Ugh, I am never going to be able to look the Professor in the eye again," moans Kitty.
Jubilee goes to the armoire and shuffles some things around, then pulls out a familiar set of copper mugs. "Looks like it's a round of Moscow Mules, guys," she says with a grin.
"Ura!," crows Peter, pulling out the vodka from under the pillow and raising it in the air.
Jubilee pours the ginger beer, Peter adds the vodka, and Kitty adds the lime juice. "Bobby, would you do the honors?" Jubilee asks.
"Yes ma'am," Bobby replies. He blows some air over the mugs, and they instantly frost over, tendrils of cold vapor wafting up from the liquid.
We each take a mug and raise it in the air for a toast. "To good friends and great shenanigans!" Jubilee cheers as we clank our mugs together.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
An hour later and we're all feeling pretty damn good. Not smashed good, but definitely buzzed. Just a little. We've demolished the bottle of Grey Goose, as well as the pizza and candy. Kitty is sitting on the floor, stroking Peter's hair as he lays with his head in her lap. Bobby is sprawled out on the beanbag again, and Jubilee is on the bed, laying on her stomach and reading another celebrity magazine. I'm curled up in the easy chair, hugging a pillow.
My mind wanders to the conversation with Jean earlier about the mission. "I wonder what that Angelica chick is like," I murmur, not realizing that I'm thinking out loud.
"Who, the new girl, Firestar?" Bobby says, instantly perked up.
"Oh, um, yeah. Jean says she's supposed to go on the pick-up with us tonight."
"Oh, man. She's hot. Both literally and figuratively," Bobby says with eyebrows waggling. He places his hands behind his head and leans back with a sigh. "One look from her could melt me into a puddle."
Jubilee rolls her eyes. "Very helpful, Bobby."
"She's got this whole cute yet sexy thing going on," Bobby continues, ignoring Jubilee. "Everybody says she's super nice, and funny as hell. She's got a great laugh, too; I heard her the other day. That's a big plus in my book. Pretty smile. Nice curves. And all that long, fiery red hair...even hotter than Jean's."
"Ugh, not you, too, Bobby. What is it with you men and redheads?" I grumble.
"I don't know," Bobby shrugs. "It's just hot. I can't explain it."
Yeah, yeah. Redheads are so frickin' hot, I know. How many times have I seen Logan shamelessly flirting with Jean? And when he goes out to the bars, if there's a redhead in the room I know he goes for her 9 times out of 10. He's told me.
I used to roll my eyes and act like I was amused by all of that nonsense. I even managed to convince myself that it didn't bother me at all. I mean, why would it? We've always been just friends. Right? Truth is, though, you can bury those feelings all you want, but they raise their ugly heads eventually. Truth is, it did bother me. Because truth is, no matter how much I've tried to tell myself that we're just friends, I've always loved Logan. From the beginning. Even when I was supposedly too young to know what it meant to have anything more than a crush on someone. I've loved him since the day he let me into his truck that snowy day so long ago.
Sure, I needed to grow and mature some, and I needed to allow our friendship to grow naturally over the years. So I buried those feelings down deep with school, friends, work, training; I tamped it down with our day-to-day friendship and teamwork and our ridiculous shared sense of humor. I buried them so deep, I almost had myself convinced that it really was just a crush, or some kind of hero worship. But truth is, those feelings don't want to stay buried any more. They've bided their time, but now they want air, and sunlight, and they want to live out in the open.
Truth is, I've always thought of Logan as mine, from day one. Too bad he doesn't want to be mine.
"Have you even talked to Angelica yet, Bobby?" Jubilee says with a raised eyebrow. "I mean, geez. If this chick is really all that, why don't you ask her out or something?" She goes back to reading her magazine.
"I'm gonna," Bobby says defensively. "I just haven't had a chance yet. She's always busy talking to other people. It would be rude to interrupt."
"Uh huh," Jubilee says, cracking her gum and flipping the page.
"I think I'm going to ask her to dance tonight. That is, if Logan doesn't get to her first." Suddenly my body stiffens.
Jubilee stops chewing her gum and shoots Bobby a look. Bobby hasn't looked up yet, so he doesn't notice.
"I was going to go introduce myself yesterday, but Logan was already talking to her. They were in the gym, and he was all up in her space, showing her how to use the equipment."
I'll bet he was.
"Bobby." Jubilee says, shooting him another look, but he still doesn't notice.
"Logan doesn't waste any time does he? He probably took one look at her and decided to stake his claim."
"Bobby!" Jubes says sharply. "Knock it off." She looks at him like she wants to punch him in the face. Bobby just stares at her for a moment, trying to figure out why she is looking at him that way. Then he looks at me and realization hits.
"Shit." Bobby says quietly. His eyes dart back to Jubilee and then to me again. "I'm--don't listen to me. That's the booze talking," he stammers, running his hands through his hair. "I don't know what I'm talking about. Really."
"Damn straight you don't," Jubilee glowers. By now Kitty and Peter are sitting up, and their eyes travel from Bobby to Jubilee and finally to me. Their faces are a mixture of shock, as if Bobby has let out some secret that they were all keeping, sympathy, which I cannot stand, and apprehension, as if they are waiting for me to react.
I clear my throat and look down, suddenly realizing that I have been squeezing the pillow with a kung fu grip. I slowly release my fingers and try to straighten out the fabric. I'm not exactly sure what to think at this moment, not sure what to say. All I know is that I need to get out of here.
I'm known to be a little bit of a hothead at times, so it's not unusual for me to go storming out of a room when I'm feeling this conflicted, slamming the door for good measure. But I don't have it in me today. I feel like I've been kicked in the gut. I feel like all the air has been knocked out of me.
I stand up slowly and put the pillow on the chair. "Hey guys. I'm kinda tired. I think I'm gonna go to my room and lay down for a while."
Everyone sits there in silence, unsure of what to say. I pick up my shoes and walk to the door, letting myself out quietly. The door latches with a click that sounds so loud, so final. Somehow, in this busy school, there is no one in the hallway as I make my way back to my room. The silence is deafening.
"Girl, work your magic!" Jubilee says as she plops down on the chair in front of me and opens up a copy of Star magazine. "I wanna do something different. Still elegant and classy, but like, you know, with a twist."
"Why do you always have to do something "different" and twisted?" Bobby says without looking up from his phone. He's sitting over by the window on a giant beanbag chair, hair freshly trimmed thanks to yours truly.
"First of all, I said 'with a twist'," replies Jubilee. "And second of all, it's because I'm one of a kind, baby. We can't all be vanilla, now can we, Snowflake?"
Bobby rolls his eyes but smiles, continuing to play games on his phone. Kitty comes out of the bathroom, hair all rolled up in curlers.
"What about a French braid, only wrapping around your head like a wreath or something, instead of straight down the back?" Kitty suggests.
"Eh, I don't know about that," says Jubilee doubtfully.
I stand there and tap my chin for a moment. "How about two poufy buns, up high where pigtails would be, with skinny braids criss-crossing in the back and some gems?"
"YES! That sounds awe-sommme!" Jubilee sings.
"Alright then, sugar. Sit back and let me work my magic."
Just then there is a knock at the door. "I come bearing pizza and candy," says a deep voice with a Russian accent.
"Peter!" Kitty exclaims, prancing to the door and swinging it open.
"Hello again, my kotonok. I missed you," Peter says before nuzzling noses with Kitty.
"You two are so cute together," Jubilee complains humorously. "It's disgusting."
"Yeah, really. It's been seriously 5 minutes since you last saw each other," Bobby adds.
"Whatever, you're all just jealous," Kitty says as she puts the pizza and candy on the big ottoman. The boys start digging into the food while Kitty hands Jubilee a slice on a plate.
"Oh yeah, totally jealous," says Jubilee.
I look around the room and smile to myself. Here we are, adults in our twenties, and we're hanging out in Jubilee's room on a Friday afternoon eating pizza and goofing off like a bunch of teenagers. It's just like old times. The only thing missing now is--
"Ooo, you know what we really need?" Jubilee says. "We need some adult refreshment." Yep. Right on cue as always, Jubes.
"Jubes, it's 1 o'clock in the afternoon," Kitty reminds her.
"Pfftt. So? I'm not looking to get hammered. But it's been a long-ass week for all of us. I think we deserve a little something, don't we guys?"
"I second that," Bobby agrees.
"Third," says Peter.
"Amen to that," I chime in. "This morning's Danger Room session was brutal. My neck is still killing me."
"I know!" groans Jubilee. "That was rough. Cyke was relentless with those Sentinel drills. I thought I was gonna die from sheer exhaustion."
"Where are we going to get alcohol right now?" Kitty asks, hands on her hips. "This is a school, after all."
The rest of us exchange "the look", and then all eyes turn on Kitty. Her eyes widen with realization. "Oh, no. No way." She crosses her arms.
"C'mon, Kittyyy," Jubilee says in a sing-song tone. "We're thirsty..."
"I'm not doing it."
"Yeah, c'mon, Kitty." Bobby makes a sad puppy face. "So...thirsty..." he says, coughing and sputtering like a man dying of thirst in the desert.
"No!" Kitty sighs in protest, but her resolve is already weakening. "I haven't done it ages. What if it's not in the same place? What if I get caught? He is the world's most powerful telepath, after all."
"Oh my God, Kitty. Are you seriously worried that you'll get in trouble or something?" Jubilee laughs. "We're not kids anymore."
"Well...no," Kitty falters. "But can you imagine how embarrassing it would be if I did get caught? I mean, we are adults and all, but still. Plus, it's the middle of the day. I've only ever done it at night."
"Where's your sense of adventure, Shadowcat?" I question her as I take a bobby pin from my mouth and secure one of the buns on Jubilee's head. "You're supposed to be the queen of stealth. And besides, the Professor is going to be all over the mansion supervising preparations for the ball. He's probably nowhere near his office. C'mon, Shadowcat, live up to your name. Use your powers for the greater good."
Kitty looks to Peter, who shrugs his shoulders and smiles. "It's up to you, my kitten. Could be fun."
"C'mon, Shadowcat! Shadowcat, Shadowcat," Bobby chants, and then Jubes and I join in. "Shadowcat, Shadowcat!"
"Ugh, fine," Kitty concedes with a roll of her eyes.
"Yeah!" we all hoot and cheer.
She takes off her robe, already wearing a black t-shirt and leggings. Peter follows as she walks over to the one side of the room and faces the section of wall between the bookcase and the nightstand.
Purely by accident, we discovered years ago that Jubilee's room is directly above the professor's study; and in fact, this particular wall and this particular spot is directly above his liquor cabinet. We've gotten into some crazy hijinks over the years, but busting into the Professor's stash was probably the riskiest thing we ever did.
I always wondered if the Professor knew what we were up to, but he never let on that he knew anything. Back then we always thought, in our over inflated teenage confidence, that we were just that good. Who knows? Maybe we were that good. Or maybe, I muse, he did know what we were up to, but let us get away with it because we were bonding, working together as a team; sort of like preparation for being future X-men. Would he do that? Nah...
Kitty rolls her shoulders and shakes her hands loosely like she is preparing for a fist fight, or a sprint. Jubilee and I look at each other with amused grins. Bobby has gone downstairs to check the Professor's door and stand as lookout.
Gracefully, like a skilled gymnast, Kitty bends forward and places her hands on the floor, then elevates her feet straight into the air, toes pointed, performing a perfect handstand. Peter grasps her ankles and looks to me for the signal. My phone alerts me to a text message from Bobby: Woodchuck to Grey Squirrel. The Eagle is clear for landing. I chuckle and nod to Peter.
"Ready, my love?"
Kitty blows out a puff of air. "Ready. I'll wiggle my toes when I need you to pull me back up."
Peter begins to slowly lower Kitty into the floor. First her head disappears, then her shoulders. She's down to her waist when she puts up her index finger, indicating that Peter needs to pause. I can just imagine what this must look like from the floor below us; the top of her head peeking through the ceiling, then two eyes, peering back and forth. The view from up here is equally as bizarre; it's a little jarring to see half of Kitty's body phased through the floor with only her legs showing. I don't think I'll ever get used to that.
After a moment, Kitty gives the thumbs up, and Peter begins lowering her further into the floor. Soon she's down to her ankles. We hold our breaths and wait. Ten seconds later, Kitty wiggles her toes, ready to be pulled back up.
Just then, there is a knock at the door. "Jubilee?" Crap. It's Jean.
"Um, yeah?" Jubilee calls out, and looks at me with big eyes. Peter freezes, while Kitty continues wiggling her toes impatiently.
"Is Rogue in there with you? I need to speak with her."
"Uh, yeah, I'm here, Jean. Just a sec." I motion for Peter to get Kitty out of the floor. He yanks her up quickly and the bottle of liquor slips out of her hand and goes flying. It makes a loud clanking noise as it crashes into the lamp and bounces off the floor. Thank God there was a soft rug there to break the fall. That could have been disastrous.
Jubilee covers her mouth and suppresses a snicker, while Kitty straightens out her clothes and gives Peter a 'What the hell?' look. Peter puts his finger to his mouth to tell Kitty to hush and picks up the bottle, stashing it under the bed pillow.
Trying to act casual, I walk to the door and open it calmly. "What's up, Jean?"
"Hey," Jean smiles warmly. "You weren't in your room, so I thought you might be here. I just wanted to let you know that Professor wants us to do a routine pick-up tonight after the ball, so we need to be ready to fly."
"Oh! Ok. I'll be ready. Who's going with us?"
"Well, it's nothing too crazy tonight; it's a teenage runaway, no FOH or anything like that, so it'll be just us and the new girl, Angelica."
"The new Physics teacher?" I say with mild surprise. "Firestar, right?"
"Yes, that's right," Jean confirms. "The Professor thought it would be a good idea for her to get her feet wet with an easy mission before getting into the heavier stuff."
"Yeah, probably a good idea," I agree.
"Ok, great, so I'll see you later, Rogue," Jean says, turning to go.
"See you later," I reply.
Jean stops and turns back to me for a moment. "Oh, one more thing." She reaches for something just outside the door then hands me a six-pack of ginger beer and a bag of limes. "The Professor said to be sure you replace his Grey Goose the next time you're out, preferably by the end of the week."
Bobby arrives at the door and screeches to a halt when he sees Jean. She winks and gives me a coy smile before heading down the hall. "Have fun," she calls out behind her.
I turn around on my heel, holding the ginger beer and limes up, while Bobby closes the door behind me. For a moment we all look at each other, speechless. Jubilee sputters and we all burst out laughing.
"Well then. I guess we weren't as good as we thought we were," I say, biting my lip. "Damn telepaths."
"That sly old dog!" Jubilee exclaims with a smile.
"Ugh, I am never going to be able to look the Professor in the eye again," moans Kitty.
Jubilee goes to the armoire and shuffles some things around, then pulls out a familiar set of copper mugs. "Looks like it's a round of Moscow Mules, guys," she says with a grin.
"Ura!," crows Peter, pulling out the vodka from under the pillow and raising it in the air.
Jubilee pours the ginger beer, Peter adds the vodka, and Kitty adds the lime juice. "Bobby, would you do the honors?" Jubilee asks.
"Yes ma'am," Bobby replies. He blows some air over the mugs, and they instantly frost over, tendrils of cold vapor wafting up from the liquid.
We each take a mug and raise it in the air for a toast. "To good friends and great shenanigans!" Jubilee cheers as we clank our mugs together.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
An hour later and we're all feeling pretty damn good. Not smashed good, but definitely buzzed. Just a little. We've demolished the bottle of Grey Goose, as well as the pizza and candy. Kitty is sitting on the floor, stroking Peter's hair as he lays with his head in her lap. Bobby is sprawled out on the beanbag again, and Jubilee is on the bed, laying on her stomach and reading another celebrity magazine. I'm curled up in the easy chair, hugging a pillow.
My mind wanders to the conversation with Jean earlier about the mission. "I wonder what that Angelica chick is like," I murmur, not realizing that I'm thinking out loud.
"Who, the new girl, Firestar?" Bobby says, instantly perked up.
"Oh, um, yeah. Jean says she's supposed to go on the pick-up with us tonight."
"Oh, man. She's hot. Both literally and figuratively," Bobby says with eyebrows waggling. He places his hands behind his head and leans back with a sigh. "One look from her could melt me into a puddle."
Jubilee rolls her eyes. "Very helpful, Bobby."
"She's got this whole cute yet sexy thing going on," Bobby continues, ignoring Jubilee. "Everybody says she's super nice, and funny as hell. She's got a great laugh, too; I heard her the other day. That's a big plus in my book. Pretty smile. Nice curves. And all that long, fiery red hair...even hotter than Jean's."
"Ugh, not you, too, Bobby. What is it with you men and redheads?" I grumble.
"I don't know," Bobby shrugs. "It's just hot. I can't explain it."
Yeah, yeah. Redheads are so frickin' hot, I know. How many times have I seen Logan shamelessly flirting with Jean? And when he goes out to the bars, if there's a redhead in the room I know he goes for her 9 times out of 10. He's told me.
I used to roll my eyes and act like I was amused by all of that nonsense. I even managed to convince myself that it didn't bother me at all. I mean, why would it? We've always been just friends. Right? Truth is, though, you can bury those feelings all you want, but they raise their ugly heads eventually. Truth is, it did bother me. Because truth is, no matter how much I've tried to tell myself that we're just friends, I've always loved Logan. From the beginning. Even when I was supposedly too young to know what it meant to have anything more than a crush on someone. I've loved him since the day he let me into his truck that snowy day so long ago.
Sure, I needed to grow and mature some, and I needed to allow our friendship to grow naturally over the years. So I buried those feelings down deep with school, friends, work, training; I tamped it down with our day-to-day friendship and teamwork and our ridiculous shared sense of humor. I buried them so deep, I almost had myself convinced that it really was just a crush, or some kind of hero worship. But truth is, those feelings don't want to stay buried any more. They've bided their time, but now they want air, and sunlight, and they want to live out in the open.
Truth is, I've always thought of Logan as mine, from day one. Too bad he doesn't want to be mine.
"Have you even talked to Angelica yet, Bobby?" Jubilee says with a raised eyebrow. "I mean, geez. If this chick is really all that, why don't you ask her out or something?" She goes back to reading her magazine.
"I'm gonna," Bobby says defensively. "I just haven't had a chance yet. She's always busy talking to other people. It would be rude to interrupt."
"Uh huh," Jubilee says, cracking her gum and flipping the page.
"I think I'm going to ask her to dance tonight. That is, if Logan doesn't get to her first." Suddenly my body stiffens.
Jubilee stops chewing her gum and shoots Bobby a look. Bobby hasn't looked up yet, so he doesn't notice.
"I was going to go introduce myself yesterday, but Logan was already talking to her. They were in the gym, and he was all up in her space, showing her how to use the equipment."
I'll bet he was.
"Bobby." Jubilee says, shooting him another look, but he still doesn't notice.
"Logan doesn't waste any time does he? He probably took one look at her and decided to stake his claim."
"Bobby!" Jubes says sharply. "Knock it off." She looks at him like she wants to punch him in the face. Bobby just stares at her for a moment, trying to figure out why she is looking at him that way. Then he looks at me and realization hits.
"Shit." Bobby says quietly. His eyes dart back to Jubilee and then to me again. "I'm--don't listen to me. That's the booze talking," he stammers, running his hands through his hair. "I don't know what I'm talking about. Really."
"Damn straight you don't," Jubilee glowers. By now Kitty and Peter are sitting up, and their eyes travel from Bobby to Jubilee and finally to me. Their faces are a mixture of shock, as if Bobby has let out some secret that they were all keeping, sympathy, which I cannot stand, and apprehension, as if they are waiting for me to react.
I clear my throat and look down, suddenly realizing that I have been squeezing the pillow with a kung fu grip. I slowly release my fingers and try to straighten out the fabric. I'm not exactly sure what to think at this moment, not sure what to say. All I know is that I need to get out of here.
I'm known to be a little bit of a hothead at times, so it's not unusual for me to go storming out of a room when I'm feeling this conflicted, slamming the door for good measure. But I don't have it in me today. I feel like I've been kicked in the gut. I feel like all the air has been knocked out of me.
I stand up slowly and put the pillow on the chair. "Hey guys. I'm kinda tired. I think I'm gonna go to my room and lay down for a while."
Everyone sits there in silence, unsure of what to say. I pick up my shoes and walk to the door, letting myself out quietly. The door latches with a click that sounds so loud, so final. Somehow, in this busy school, there is no one in the hallway as I make my way back to my room. The silence is deafening.