Decompression
Wedding is over. Last wedding event was brunch this morning. The past few days have been a bit of a whirl-wind consisting of events, finding transportation, hors dourves, and booze. Much booze. At one point last night my urine smelled like champagne. Speaking of which, if a person makes a toast at a wedding and you want to tell them it was good, doing it while they are URINATING is not the best time. Nor is it appropriate the grasp their shoulder while delivering the compliment. To the person who did this, thanks... But do not touch me while I am touching me.
Continuing on... Wonderful events, good people. Let's go by the day:
Upon arrival Thursday we met the fiance's sister and rode into the lake town with her. This scared the hell out of me. Seriously. She has lived in France for a while and drives like it. This wouldn't be so bad if 1) she didn't believe all Americans can't drive for shit and 2) she watched the road. Made it to the hotel without dying, got cleaned up. Room has a deck over the water. People were meeting at the house of fiance's parents, we decided to chill out and get some rest before the cocktail party. In the process of finding out how we are getting to the cocktail party it comes down to having to go to the rents' house anyway. We walked. The only shitty part is that Oregon has been having a heat wave. Record highs. Over 100 degrees. Sweat dripping off me. Vyx had some issues too. Made it there, got a ride back to the hotel to clean again and change then get a ride to the cocktail party. Due to the record highs the restaraunt had some AC issues so it was warm in there. Hors dourves and wine. LOTS of wine. I am pretty sure most of the people were tanked. Ride home (and too) from the other sister (RiRi). Conversations of politics and the existence of existentialism. Unfortunately, between the lack of substantial food, the heat, and the lots of wine Vyx got sick after we got back. Eventually went to bed.
*1
Friday Yyx and I got up early to try and find a shop that sold swim trunks for me. This was unsuccessfull, though we did find a French bakery. On the way back from the failed shopping mission we get a call from the mother unit saying that they saw us and asking if we wanted a ride. We take it and head to the "swimming party". Yeah... rent's house is on a lake. Me having only jeans sticks to a boat ride and nothing else (except profuse sweating). Vyx gets a sunburn. Back to the hotel with other new friends, clean up, back to the rents house for the rehersal. So we deem it done (don't ask). Still in record highs (106 that day I think). Wipe down, change shirts, shuttle to the dock for the dinner cruise along the river. Buffet and open bar. Wootness. Nice night. Back to the hotel on the shuttle where a picture tree attacked Vyx. Opened the pinot noir (Oregon wines are actually good -surprise) then headed off to bed.
*2
Bro sends me a text asking of we had breakfast Saturday morning as he stayed at the hotel as well. He and I head up to the bakery, get coffee and pastries, walk back down and chill until we groomsmen have to head to lunch. Find out that the little farmer's market is only that day so Vyx and I rush up there and get cheese and bread. Kind of a wanna-be micro brewery (I ask for Guinness and the idiot waiter offers me a porter. Not the same as a stout jack-ass). Lunch as good though. Back to the room, chill for a bit then put on the tux, hop in the limo and head back to the rents house. We groomsmen stay upstairs as long as we can because being in a tux while it's 104 out would be bad. BAD. Head down the back, escort mother unit to her seat, race back up then head down with the groomsmen and wait for the bridal party to finish the boat ride over. Too many things making us laugh to put in this already too long post, but I will say shaking keys, rock climbing bridesmaids, ant on cleavage, and judge announcing that the groom is sweating. Stay down for all the pics then back in the limo for the reception. Cristal in a Hummer limo; I officially have my thug card. Yay open bar part 2. Yay sushi for the hors dourves then meat and shrimp for dinner. Picture both for the guest book, which was an awesome idea. Lead off with the toast, completely making shit up when I walked up though complimented on it for the rest of the night. End out the night and crash at the hotel.
*3
*4
*5
And this brings us to Sunday. Head back to the rents with the new friends, have brunch, see off Bro and new Sis, then catch a ride back to the hotel. Walk up to the store, get some meat and wine to go with the cheese and bread from the market, and general plans to chill. We get a wild hair up our butts and walk out for ice cream and after decide we have no desire to do anything. So back to the room, feed the duck off the deck, and TV.
That's it for now folks.
All pics courtesy of RiRi. More to come when we get home
1. Me and the bro
2. Vyx, me, Frenchie, and bro
3. Bro and the new Sis
4. My toasting skills
5. Vyx and me
Continuing on... Wonderful events, good people. Let's go by the day:
Upon arrival Thursday we met the fiance's sister and rode into the lake town with her. This scared the hell out of me. Seriously. She has lived in France for a while and drives like it. This wouldn't be so bad if 1) she didn't believe all Americans can't drive for shit and 2) she watched the road. Made it to the hotel without dying, got cleaned up. Room has a deck over the water. People were meeting at the house of fiance's parents, we decided to chill out and get some rest before the cocktail party. In the process of finding out how we are getting to the cocktail party it comes down to having to go to the rents' house anyway. We walked. The only shitty part is that Oregon has been having a heat wave. Record highs. Over 100 degrees. Sweat dripping off me. Vyx had some issues too. Made it there, got a ride back to the hotel to clean again and change then get a ride to the cocktail party. Due to the record highs the restaraunt had some AC issues so it was warm in there. Hors dourves and wine. LOTS of wine. I am pretty sure most of the people were tanked. Ride home (and too) from the other sister (RiRi). Conversations of politics and the existence of existentialism. Unfortunately, between the lack of substantial food, the heat, and the lots of wine Vyx got sick after we got back. Eventually went to bed.
*1
Friday Yyx and I got up early to try and find a shop that sold swim trunks for me. This was unsuccessfull, though we did find a French bakery. On the way back from the failed shopping mission we get a call from the mother unit saying that they saw us and asking if we wanted a ride. We take it and head to the "swimming party". Yeah... rent's house is on a lake. Me having only jeans sticks to a boat ride and nothing else (except profuse sweating). Vyx gets a sunburn. Back to the hotel with other new friends, clean up, back to the rents house for the rehersal. So we deem it done (don't ask). Still in record highs (106 that day I think). Wipe down, change shirts, shuttle to the dock for the dinner cruise along the river. Buffet and open bar. Wootness. Nice night. Back to the hotel on the shuttle where a picture tree attacked Vyx. Opened the pinot noir (Oregon wines are actually good -surprise) then headed off to bed.
*2
Bro sends me a text asking of we had breakfast Saturday morning as he stayed at the hotel as well. He and I head up to the bakery, get coffee and pastries, walk back down and chill until we groomsmen have to head to lunch. Find out that the little farmer's market is only that day so Vyx and I rush up there and get cheese and bread. Kind of a wanna-be micro brewery (I ask for Guinness and the idiot waiter offers me a porter. Not the same as a stout jack-ass). Lunch as good though. Back to the room, chill for a bit then put on the tux, hop in the limo and head back to the rents house. We groomsmen stay upstairs as long as we can because being in a tux while it's 104 out would be bad. BAD. Head down the back, escort mother unit to her seat, race back up then head down with the groomsmen and wait for the bridal party to finish the boat ride over. Too many things making us laugh to put in this already too long post, but I will say shaking keys, rock climbing bridesmaids, ant on cleavage, and judge announcing that the groom is sweating. Stay down for all the pics then back in the limo for the reception. Cristal in a Hummer limo; I officially have my thug card. Yay open bar part 2. Yay sushi for the hors dourves then meat and shrimp for dinner. Picture both for the guest book, which was an awesome idea. Lead off with the toast, completely making shit up when I walked up though complimented on it for the rest of the night. End out the night and crash at the hotel.
*3
*4
*5
And this brings us to Sunday. Head back to the rents with the new friends, have brunch, see off Bro and new Sis, then catch a ride back to the hotel. Walk up to the store, get some meat and wine to go with the cheese and bread from the market, and general plans to chill. We get a wild hair up our butts and walk out for ice cream and after decide we have no desire to do anything. So back to the room, feed the duck off the deck, and TV.
That's it for now folks.
All pics courtesy of RiRi. More to come when we get home
1. Me and the bro
2. Vyx, me, Frenchie, and bro
3. Bro and the new Sis
4. My toasting skills
5. Vyx and me