(no subject)
...
I'm not entirely sure what's wrong. But it seems to me something is. I feel so... bleah.
What I do know is that I don't feel like doing anything. Not music - writing or playing, not reading or writing. Not really even video games or TV. It seems like the only thing I ever do anymore is work or prepare for work (and of course my token music class and piano lessons at school). And of course, sleep. My jogging routine has gone out the window, in part from the cold, wet, dark, and probably in part because of my own laziness.
Part of what hurts is that I was essentially stuck in my house for the entire time I had off work. So, aside from today when I went to school, I've been at my house since I got home from work on Saturday. First the snow/ice on the hill to my house (not a long hill, but long and steep enough to keep me from getting the car up it that first night; not sure how my dad managed it), and then the flooding on the road. And most of those daylight hours on Sunday and Monday were spent without power.
Really, though, I think that matter was just amplifying whatever it was was already wrong with me. I remember thinking to myself how cool it would be to do a cover of "One-Winged Angel." While still a really awesome song (you should listen if you haven't heard it), I don't think there's anything we could do to it that would add to it. Almost as though we couldn't really do it justice. Which is weird to say, since I think we could (ideally) do just about everything, musically speaking. Because of what I was working with (midis and so forth), I couldn't work on it when the power was out.
I also remember reading "Life of Pi," nearly all the way through in two days. Which isn't really fast reading, but considering I generally spend weeks (if not months) on a book, it was an intense pace for me.
I haven't had a chance to see Cortney recently either, except for about 5 minutes around 4:30 today. Not that my emotional well-being depends on her, but she's certainly very important to me, and ever-so helpful.
Ug. I don't feel... and not feeling is what really hurts most, I think. *headdesk*
"I woke up today
To a world that's ground to dust, dirt and stone
I'm the king upon this withering throne."
"I am on my own
I am all alone
Everything is gone
Stuck forever here
Already cold."
~Pain of Salvation, "Iter Impius"
I'm not entirely sure what's wrong. But it seems to me something is. I feel so... bleah.
What I do know is that I don't feel like doing anything. Not music - writing or playing, not reading or writing. Not really even video games or TV. It seems like the only thing I ever do anymore is work or prepare for work (and of course my token music class and piano lessons at school). And of course, sleep. My jogging routine has gone out the window, in part from the cold, wet, dark, and probably in part because of my own laziness.
Part of what hurts is that I was essentially stuck in my house for the entire time I had off work. So, aside from today when I went to school, I've been at my house since I got home from work on Saturday. First the snow/ice on the hill to my house (not a long hill, but long and steep enough to keep me from getting the car up it that first night; not sure how my dad managed it), and then the flooding on the road. And most of those daylight hours on Sunday and Monday were spent without power.
Really, though, I think that matter was just amplifying whatever it was was already wrong with me. I remember thinking to myself how cool it would be to do a cover of "One-Winged Angel." While still a really awesome song (you should listen if you haven't heard it), I don't think there's anything we could do to it that would add to it. Almost as though we couldn't really do it justice. Which is weird to say, since I think we could (ideally) do just about everything, musically speaking. Because of what I was working with (midis and so forth), I couldn't work on it when the power was out.
I also remember reading "Life of Pi," nearly all the way through in two days. Which isn't really fast reading, but considering I generally spend weeks (if not months) on a book, it was an intense pace for me.
I haven't had a chance to see Cortney recently either, except for about 5 minutes around 4:30 today. Not that my emotional well-being depends on her, but she's certainly very important to me, and ever-so helpful.
Ug. I don't feel... and not feeling is what really hurts most, I think. *headdesk*
"I woke up today
To a world that's ground to dust, dirt and stone
I'm the king upon this withering throne."
"I am on my own
I am all alone
Everything is gone
Stuck forever here
Already cold."
~Pain of Salvation, "Iter Impius"