Title: [FIC] Realizations
Author: huushiita
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Ryan/Colin
Summary: Colin realizes that he is in love with Ryan, and tries to deal with the emotions accordingly. (Whereas Greg has suspected for awhile, and helps Colin)
Warnings: First Whose Line fic.
Ryan.
Colin thought the name at random times, and his heart seemed to break inside his chest each time. He'd be in the line up at the grocery store, wondering about which pack of gum to buy while pondering over the seemingly endless choices. Or, stopped at an intersection, glaring at the red light, quite impatient to continue on with his day. Or in the middle of a shower, washing what little hair he had left. And the name would just race into his head, and he'd mentally swirl it around inside his mind, tasting quite delicious. Colin would then shiver, the goosebumps raising up on his skin, all along his arms. And he'd notice his breath hitch. And he'd involuntarily sigh. He'd clamp down, scowling slightly, and gently bite down on the inside of his lip, trying to calm down. Then, he'd continue on with whatever he was doing.
The worst though, was when he'd be at the video shootings for the show. Because there would be way for him to continue, no way to escape Ryan, not with him being so damn near the whole time. Colin would always seem to smell Ryan's cologne just before the cameras rolled. The smell would waft over towards the slightly shorter man. Colin would close his eyes, and breath it in. In his mind, the smell was a big comfort blanket that he could wrap himself in. A mental hug, he'd come to call it. Ryan smelled deliciously like spicy musk. He felt scared, yet enboldened during those times. Colin kept this secret buried down inside him. He didn't know what his best friend would think if he ever found out. He didn't want anybody to find out.
At the present time Ryan was sitting with one leg crossed, looking around nonchalantly. It was almost as if he were bored. Mind you, Ryan always looked bored, or irked. Colin was finding it increasingly difficult over time to not be jumpy around the other man. He cleared his throat, and twitched when Ryan looked his way. The smile on his face, set Colin's heart pounding anew. He tasted blood in his mouth, before he figured out that he was biting on his inside lip a lot harder than he had intended.
'You think we'll be doing another hoedown, today?' Ryan said, scowling a bit, before glaring in the general direction of the producers.
Colin opened his mouth to speak, but paused as he noticed Ryan had slightly parted his lips in order to wet them. Colin's heart decided to skip a beat, and found himself unconsciously mimicking the taller man's action.
Ryan looked back towards Colin, shaking his head and muttering something about 'fucking Brits.' Colin shook himself as if to dislodge the sudden tunnel vision syndrome he seemed to get upon being near Ryan. His eyes skimmed the studio and he was vaguely surprised to find Greg staring at him, two seats over. Colin's sweaty body instantly turned to ice.
Greg had one arm draped on the arm of his chair. The other arm was against his body tight, before he moved it so that it was now propping up his chin. Greg's eyes glittered out from behind his glasses, his head tilted slightly. Colin noticed that the usual upbeat man was frowning slightly, and felt like he was being studied. Before he could really get a look at Greg, Colin was interrupted. Ryan had poured them both a glass of water and was now handing one to him. Colin nodded his thanks before taking a sip. It seemed all the witty banter had gone out of him. He almost spit water across the room for Greg was now looking between both Ryan and Colin with with a curious expression. Colin knew that Greg knew something was up, but hadn't quite placed it. Unfortunately, Colin couldn't ponder what Greg had seen since the producers of the show were now telling them that the audience was arriving.
The first game was Helping Hands. Drew announced what the scenario was from off his cards, and called up Greg, Ryan and Colin. Colin placed himself behind Ryan, just a bit closer than was necessary, who wrapped his hands so that they were behind both of them, while Colin put forth his hands in front of Ryan. Colin peered around Ryan quickly, to get the layout of the table. There was corn on the cob right next to the butter, carrots and celery, broccoli in front of the tomatoes, and then there was a bowl of lettuce behind asparagus but beside the cucumber.
The game started with Greg only prompting Ryan slightly, but Colin was only half listening. Colin couldn't concentrate. He couldn't figure it out! He'd done this game plenty of times before, but why was this time affecting him this badly? Maybe it was the realization that he'd fallen in love with his best friend? He didn't know, but upon hearing Ryan say something about the butter, he tossed a carrot behind them and quickly grabbed the butter. He couldn't see that his hands shook slightly. The butter felt cold in his hands, as he picked it up. He grabbed a utensil, a knife, and tried to scrape some off to put on the corn on the cob Ryan was talking about.
Suddenly, what he wanted to do was heat up the block of butter and let the hot drips of it fall onto Ryan's body so that he could then lick it up. The picture in his mind was very vivid, and he bit back a moan and buried his head into the taller man's back. Before he could stop himself, he felt himself thrust marginally. He felt Ryan stiffen, but then realized too late, that his own stiffness was probably pressing against the man's leg. No help could be done about it.
Greg, who had been watching the two carefully, stepped back as a piece of tomato flew out in front of him. At his now vantage point, he saw Colin's head on Ryan's back. Carefully keeping his face neutral, he also saw the minutiae thrust that Colin did behind Ryan. Quickly stepping forward again, he noticed Ryan's face freezing for a second too long. Something had been going on between the two for a long time, though Greg had a feeling that Ryan had no inkling. Colin must have stronger feelings than mere friendship, Greg thought.
Greg had been observing the two closely for the last few weeks, when he had started noticing Colin making moon-eyes at Ryan. It had been subtle enough for the others to have not noticed, but Greg had heard the sharp intake of breath after Ryan had gotten to close one time. He figured it out instantly. It now looked to Greg that Colin was now figuring it out himself, weeks later, and was doing a very admirable job at hiding that there was something... up. Greg knew something was up, and it wasn't just Colin's new behavior.
Greg was almost relieved for Colin when Drew buzzed to announce that the game was now over. Indeed, Colin's face instantly relaxed, and he pulled his arms out from Ryan's, and almost raced back towards the seat. They played a few more games before a break was called. Colin went outside for some fresh air, and to hopefully clear his head. Greg had followed him out.
Colin watched Greg wearily, as the other man lazily leaned against the side of the building. Greg lit up a smoke, and inhaled deeply, studying the Canadian the whole time. It made Colin very nervous, though he tried not to let it show.
Greg blew out the smoke, before speaking. 'What is up with you, today?' he said conversationally.
Colin shrugged. 'I'm off my game, it seems.'
Greg flicked his cigarette and blinked. Greg was the epitome of relaxed, and he took another long drag on his smoke. 'I'd say that you're more wanting to get off.'
Colin eyes shot towards Greg's, and it felt like he was having heart palpitations. 'What are you--'
Greg cut him off by waving his hand. 'Colin. It's okay. I know. I've suspected for awhile, but I wasn't too sure until a few days ago. Today you've merely confirmed it.' Greg paused to finish his smoke off, and he threw it on the ground before grinding it out with his foot.
Colin simply stared at him. He honestly didn't know what to say.
Greg clapped him on the back. 'Hey dude! It's fine. Nobody else noticed, they are all completely oblivious. Even Ryan. Although that first game, you almost blew it. Anyway, it's time to go back. You'll be fine!'
Greg lead his friend back into the studio, just in time for the next wave of games.
To be continued, obviously.
What do you guys think?