Battle of the Sexes
Title: A Rose by Any Other Name
Characters/Pairing: G!Spock/B!Uhura
Authorwitblogi
Rating: What was the movie rated?....pg 13 maybe?
Words: ~3000
Warnings: GENDERSWAP. COMPLETELY UNBETAED.
Summary: If we lived in a matriarchal society... (complete universe genderswap)
Disclaimer:I don't own Trek
Notes: Um, this might be the most unoriginal thing I've ever written :| I can't decide if i truly like it or not but i definitely needed to feel out their characters through this fic before I could write anything else in the weird m!Uhura/g!Spock universe. Uhura's name is Nyot -IDK i was going to go with Nyoto but meh i didn't like it as much and i wasn't about to go changing it to "blazing sun" or something more masculine. I've kept Spock as Spock because I really really really hate the name T'Pock.
Dedicated to mistaria for wanting the swap without shame :) i hope you enjoy it
Male uhura = here
Female spock (only maybe less SUPER FIERCE)= here
Spock stood from the captain's chair looking as perfectly composed as always- if it weren’t for the tension between her eyes the slowness in her fingers and how she nervously smoothed her skirt .
Uhura tracked her progress across the bridge with his eyes, pulling his ear-piece as she stepped into the turbo lift. With three quick strides he followed, ignoring the sideways looks he was gathering.
Catching the lift’s door he shoved it back open and stepped forward, jabbing the door close button after him.
The lift began to descend and Spock did not look up. He swiped at the control panel again, stopping the progress of the lift and creating an eerie silence in their bubble. It wasn’t silent however, he could hear her breathing, the way it slightly caught in her throat on every inhale.
He reached out to her chin, pushing her face up so her wide eyes, met his.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered, voice trembling deeply, such an awkward sound in the moment, “I’m so sorry,” he kept his gaze as stern as hers for a beat and then slid his hand around from her chin to her neck pulling her to him, tucking her under his chin and trying with all his power to envelope her completely in his arms.
He closed his eyes tightly as she resisted for merely a moment before her forehead was against his shoulder and her hands clutched his arm and side painfully.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered into her soft hair, pressing a kiss there as one ragged intake of breath was heard from below.
“What do you need?” he asked his eyes still tightly closed, thumb stroking her cheek. He pulled back slightly to see her face still without the moisture of tears, he furrowed his brows- his strong beautiful Spock.
“What do you need? Tell me.” He loosened his embrace as she pushed away straightening back into the figure, the commander he knew Spock needed to be, to push her tidal wave of emotion back with.
“I need-” Her voice broke, “For everyone to continue performing admirably.” She finished strong, her gaze locked onto his. He pressed his lips together, arms feeling like dead weight.
“Okay.” he said blinking and nodding, “Okay.” he gambled then, taking one step forward, dipping his head to press his lips against hers for the briefest moment before she hit the controls for the lift again and was slipping out of his fingers down the corridor.
§§§
He watched the altercation on the bridge escalate, Kirk’s eyes flashing as she prodded Spock’s raw nerves. Uhura had stood to the side, his jaw clenched, hands curled into fists, nose flaring with anger. Who the hell did Kirk think she was-
But before he could even think of risking his entire commission- career- Spock was already tossing Kirk across the bridge like a rag doll. All anger vanished from his system replaced by fear and anxiety before he knew it. He took a step forward at the same moment another figure did- Spock’s mother gazing upon the altercation with a placidity Uhura didn’t think was possible when faced with seeing the life being choked from something.
“Spock.” She said, her voice ringing out strong and calm. Spock only tightened her grip, teeth clenched, her dress hiked up so it barely covered the curve of her bottom like she hadn’t heard a word. Her hair, a disheveled black curtain, trembled with the effort bunched in her muscles and pressed into Kirk’s windpipe.
And then as Kirk’s lips began to go slack and purple, Spock let go all at once. Kirk rolled over coughing but Uhura’s attention was solely on Spock as she stood before the doctor-McCoy- and noted her emotional compromisation. Uhura’s feet worked quickly, carrying him around the edges of the bridge to meet Spock before she was able to leave.
“Spock-” He kept his voice low, reaching out just barely to her. Spock just looked at him over her shoulder, drew in a deep breath and blinked away, leaving the bridge with her shoulders hunched.
Uhura clenched his hands there was nothing he could do- to chase after her would be a joke, what could he say? I know what you’re going through? Hardly. He turned back to the bridge; there was work to be done.
“Now we’ve got no captain and no god damn first officer to replace her,” McCoy said, her hands on her hips and face pulled into a scowl.
“Yeah we do,” Kirk smiled wanly pushing her floppy bangs out of her face and sliding into the captain’s chair. Uhura stiffened from where he was watching.
“What?”
“Pike made her first officer,” Sulu -the pilot with the combat training- said, gesturing to Kirk, her pony-tail swinging with the motion. Kirk didn’t belong in a captain’s chair, she never had, but Pike had faith in her for some psychotic reason, and the least Uhura could do was repay the favour Kirk had done him getting him on the bridge.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” McCoy voiced as much as Uhura was thinking and her and Kirk were actually friends. He sighed, shifting his limbs, trying to get used to this idea of Kirk being his Captain. It didn’t sit right with him, he didn’t trust her, respect her like he needed to, but to survive this battle, to prevent Nero from doing any more damage he had to put all his faith in Kirk.
“Thanks for the support.” Kirk muttered, eyes down cast while everyone returned to their stations, Uhura paused as he passed her, unable to keep in his own opinion.
“I sure hope you know what you’re doing, Captain.” He spat the last word unable to overcome the lingering protective instincts- Kirk had hurt Spock intentionally- for that damn chair Now she just had to prove herself or Uhura was going to resume choking her himself.
“So do I.” Kirk glanced up at him earnestly, all joking, and flirtation aside. She was as scared shitless as the rest of them. Uhura pressed his lips together and made his way to his station, he had a job to do whether he liked it or not.
§§§
All he knew was he was following them, following this harebrained plan because it was all they could do. His mother, his father, everyone he’d known would be dead if they didn’t risk this, if Spock didn’t risk this.
He’d initially meant to just check on their communication array, that their frequencies were adjusted and set- but watching Spock stride up to the transporter pad, hips holstered with her phaser something tightened in his chest.
He wasn’t about to go losing her too. He didn’t care what anyone else thought -the transporter technicians, Kirk, that weird Scottish woman- no one was going to take this goodbye away from him.
He stepped up onto the pad before her while she watched. This unique, perfect being, who had taught him so much, who he had thought was impossibly unattainable watching him. His breath whooshed out of his chest and he reached forward, unable to express any of the emotions curling in his inside him, beating at his ribs. Gasping her arms, he slid one hand down and around to her waist and finally kissed her properly. There was no mistaking this for anything other than romantic and Uhura didn’t care, he loved Spock, he loved her and he needed her to know before she left. Their lips parted and he rested his forehead on hers for a moment.
“ I will be back,” She assured him, like he was overreacting about a milk run. He pulled away to look at her seriously, cupping her face in both hands, fingers brushing the points of her ears.
“You’d better be.” He didn’t mean for it to come out so gruff, like a threat, but her eyes just looked knowingly back at him, “I’ll be monitoring your frequency,” he whispered lowering his gaze, letting his hands sink to her neck.
“Thank you, Nyot.” Spock whispered back, leaning into one last fleeting kiss before Uhura pulled away completely, shooting Kirk a warning look as he turned and left the pad.
As he watched the last of the transporter residue fade, he hoped, as hard as he ever had that that girl would come back to him.
§§§
It was twenty-four hours later when he found himself in sickbay. Kirk’s orders, all her ‘alpha shift’ needed to be checked over. Uhura supposed he should be flattered by his promotion, by being in Kirk’s favour, but he wasn’t hurt, he wasn’t in shock, he hadn’t done anything, couldn’t do anything.
He clenched his fingers together as he waited for someone, anyone to give him the once over and sign off on his health. He needed to work, to continue sending out distress signals, to capture the attention of the rest of the fleet, and maybe maybe they’d make it limping back to Earth without becoming victim of any random pirate looking to loot a crippled federation ship.
“ Lieutenant Uhura.” A man, blonde, tall and authoritative called his name and waved him over to a bed. He took a requisite identity scanner to look over his records and then looked up with grave eyes.
“I’m Nurse Chapel. I’ll be looking you over for injuries.”
“I don’t have any injuries, maybe a bruise or two from the hits to the ship but I’m fine.” Uhura resisted rolling his eyes and refused to sit on the bed.
“Good try, I haven’t heard that one before,” Chapel pushed him with two fingers so he backed into the bed and raised his tricorder. Uhura leaned but didn’t sit.
“Seriously-”
“Seriously shut up, Lieutenant. You’re dehydrated and exhausted. Maybe you don’t look like you went ten rounds with a Klingon but you aren’t fine either.” He said sternly, picking up a hypospray from his tray and applying it swiftly.
Uhura kept his mouth shut after that, hoping the quicker he could leave the quicker he could get away from this place and so many people. The sick and injured pressed in on all sides, overflowing the beds that were never supposed to see such devastation- it was too much. After another few moments Chapel finally looked up as he punched in the codes for a new round of scans.
“You’re the Uhura then?” He asked acting like he wasn’t being a gossipy nurse. Uhura blinked at him.
“The Uhura?” He asked skeptically.
“You’re dating Commander Spock.” Chapel looked both impressed and skeptical. Uhura frowned, he was not in the mood for shop-talk, not when so much had happened, not when Spock was in such a state and how dare anyone else bring up something so trivial.
“I’m sorry I didn’t know we were being teenage girls- let me try again.” Uhura fairly snarled, taking satisfaction when Chapel’s tricorder beeped unhappily as he moved.
“ Look I’m sorry, but it’s all they’re talking about.” Chapel gestured to a gaggle of injured female ensigns sitting together in their beds, nursing their cuts and burns as one. He reset his scan and started again.
“It’s none of their business.” Uhura muttered, he could feel his fatigue catching up with him.
“They need something to get their mind off of…everything. Besides, she was an instructor it lends a level of intrigue to it all I guess.” Chapel drifted off for a moment, “ Well, who knows how women think. You pass the exam for now, but you’re off duty or the next twelve hours at least.”
The prospect of so much time with nothing to do had terrified him not so long ago. Now he didn’t even know if he’d make it to his temporary quarters before he passed out. His limbs were heavy as he left sickbay, trudging to the lift and making his way to the belly of the ship.
He tried twice to punch in his access code, fingers clumsy and mind wandering. He couldn’t stop thinking, couldn’t stop feeling, but his body had apparently given up.
Once inside his quarters he was confronted with the sight of Spock, rising from a seat she’d taken by the meager viewing port.
“What’re you-”
“ I abused my commanding offical privileges and overrode your personal access code. You may report my misconduct.” She said with such ease and quickness, like she’d been planning to say it since she first stepped through the door.
“What? Spock.” He shuffled forward. Her eyes jumped from his face to the rest of his body, assessing the way he moved, held himself, breathed, everything.
“You are fatigued I will depart-” She swiftly tried to maneuver around him but he wasn’t about to let her go this time. He caught her around the wrist but didn’t pull, merely held.
“What are you doing here Spock? Why aren’t you with your mother and the others?” He asked unable to fathom her answer at the moment. He wasn’t about to start playing guessing games, not now, not with Spock.
“I was.” She said curtly looking down at his hand on her wrist. He slid his fingers along the sensitive inside crook, just barely brushing where her rank bangles rested on her forearm “ But I found myself…” she looked up at him, “In want of your company.”
“My company.” He huffed, letting her go. He smiled to himself pushing the rest of the way inside to collapse exhaustedly onto his Starfleet issued sofa.
“I find your perspectives on issues of personal and professional nature refreshing, I seek your opinion.” She pulled her arms behind her back and he blinked his eyes closed for a moment seeing nothing but the impressions of photon torpedoes tearing into metal and the screech of battle- he opened them again.
“My opinion.” He blinked up at her.
“Are you of a sufficient mental state? Your persistent repetition is disconcerting.” She cocked her head taking a step closer to him no doubt in the effort to check his pupil dilation. He huffed another raspy laugh, and swallowed at it’s sound, licking his lips unable to fathom truly laughing with joyous abandon again.
“I’m fine, I just came from medical. What did you want to talk about?” he began to toe off his boots kicking them haphazardly to the floor socks soon following. Spock watched his progress with her usual interested expression, but now there was a sense of vagueness to it, a haunted quality in her eyes where amusement had once resided.
“The elders that remain onboard the Enterprise have been discussing the fate of the remaining Vulcans in the universe. They wish to regroup and form a new colony as soon as possible.” She said finally, picking her words carefully. Uhura rolled his neck and stretched out his arms.
“Well, that’s good, isn’t it?” He asked, allowing her to continue while he got comfortable.
“All Vulcans have a duty to return, to assist in the perpetuation of our species, and under certain lethal circumstances re-bonding suitable pairs is first priority.” She said taking another step towards him as he reclined, hands lacing behind his head.
“Right. That also makes sense.” He looked up at her uncomprehending. She pulled her hands out form behind her back and instead laced them together in front of her. That was not a good sign.
“I am not exempt from this duty.” She said at last unable to meet his gaze. Uhura took a slow breath and sat up again placing his bare feet on the floor.
“Half Vulcan is still Vulcan enough.” He sighed dropping his face into his hands, elbows on his knees. He almost couldn’t comprehend it. He’s so tired of this, of the universe throwing curveballs. Pain rose up in the back of his throat and his eyes stung.
“It appears so.” She said taking the seat beside him close enough he felt the heat of her body all along his right side.
“So where does that leave us?” He asked, swallowing hard on the lump in his throat and pulling his face out of his hands. He looked back at her where she is sitting with her usual perfect posture. Her gaze flickered to his and then away again.
“I do not know.”
Uhura looked away, at the flooring, at his hands, at anything but saw nothing. Spock always knew, she always knew and now... he shook his head.
“When was the last time you slept?” He asked finally. She won’t lie to him but he knows she wants to.
“Fifty one point two six hours ago.” Uhura whistled lowly. “Medical has been alerted already but I have found my body most un-willing to-”
“You can’t turn your brain off. I know.” He leaned back and kicked out his legs keeping his hands in his lap. They sat with just the hum of the ship between them for what felt like hours. Uhura couldn’t stop turning over the same questions in his mind, couldn’t go near that angry hurt hole that has been punched in his chest yet. Everything is so sensitive, so tender, he just wanted to sleep, to forget, to have things go back to the way they were.
Spock shifted beside him and he looked at her, the cast of her eyes, the shape of her nose, the way her hair fell over her shoulder. If he couldn’t have her forever, he could have her for the next twelve hours.
He stood and held his hand out to her. She looked up at him and barely hesitated before taking his hand in hers and let him guide her up and to where the barely unpacked mattress waited.
“Lie with me,” He said flopping back, “Just for a while.” He pillowed his head on his arm and watched with tormented satisfaction as she toed off her own boots far more gracefully than he and crawled up to lie beside him.
He rose up on one elbow to look her over and tucked his hand into the pocket of space between her lower back and the bed and sighed.
“My mother told me she married my father because she loved him.” Spock said furrowing her brows slightly, pulling one of her hands up to trace across his cheek, rubbing her knuckles along his lower lip, “I do not know if she told him.”
Uhura hummed, from all he’d heard, his wished he could have met Spock’s father, Adam Grayson sounded like an inspiring man.
“Despite knowing what will be expected of my future…” She breathed blinking slowly, she was trying to say something, desperately fighting to get the words out.
“I must tell you-”
“Shh,” Uhura leaned over her, close enough to press his forehead to hers, to bump her nose with the end of his, “I know.” He kissed the corner of her mouth, one pointed brow tip, the apple of her cheek.
“I know.”
Characters/Pairing: G!Spock/B!Uhura
Authorwitblogi
Rating: What was the movie rated?....pg 13 maybe?
Words: ~3000
Warnings: GENDERSWAP. COMPLETELY UNBETAED.
Summary: If we lived in a matriarchal society... (complete universe genderswap)
Disclaimer:I don't own Trek
Notes: Um, this might be the most unoriginal thing I've ever written :| I can't decide if i truly like it or not but i definitely needed to feel out their characters through this fic before I could write anything else in the weird m!Uhura/g!Spock universe. Uhura's name is Nyot -IDK i was going to go with Nyoto but meh i didn't like it as much and i wasn't about to go changing it to "blazing sun" or something more masculine. I've kept Spock as Spock because I really really really hate the name T'Pock.
Dedicated to mistaria for wanting the swap without shame :) i hope you enjoy it
Male uhura = here
Female spock (only maybe less SUPER FIERCE)= here
Spock stood from the captain's chair looking as perfectly composed as always- if it weren’t for the tension between her eyes the slowness in her fingers and how she nervously smoothed her skirt .
Uhura tracked her progress across the bridge with his eyes, pulling his ear-piece as she stepped into the turbo lift. With three quick strides he followed, ignoring the sideways looks he was gathering.
Catching the lift’s door he shoved it back open and stepped forward, jabbing the door close button after him.
The lift began to descend and Spock did not look up. He swiped at the control panel again, stopping the progress of the lift and creating an eerie silence in their bubble. It wasn’t silent however, he could hear her breathing, the way it slightly caught in her throat on every inhale.
He reached out to her chin, pushing her face up so her wide eyes, met his.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered, voice trembling deeply, such an awkward sound in the moment, “I’m so sorry,” he kept his gaze as stern as hers for a beat and then slid his hand around from her chin to her neck pulling her to him, tucking her under his chin and trying with all his power to envelope her completely in his arms.
He closed his eyes tightly as she resisted for merely a moment before her forehead was against his shoulder and her hands clutched his arm and side painfully.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered into her soft hair, pressing a kiss there as one ragged intake of breath was heard from below.
“What do you need?” he asked his eyes still tightly closed, thumb stroking her cheek. He pulled back slightly to see her face still without the moisture of tears, he furrowed his brows- his strong beautiful Spock.
“What do you need? Tell me.” He loosened his embrace as she pushed away straightening back into the figure, the commander he knew Spock needed to be, to push her tidal wave of emotion back with.
“I need-” Her voice broke, “For everyone to continue performing admirably.” She finished strong, her gaze locked onto his. He pressed his lips together, arms feeling like dead weight.
“Okay.” he said blinking and nodding, “Okay.” he gambled then, taking one step forward, dipping his head to press his lips against hers for the briefest moment before she hit the controls for the lift again and was slipping out of his fingers down the corridor.
§§§
He watched the altercation on the bridge escalate, Kirk’s eyes flashing as she prodded Spock’s raw nerves. Uhura had stood to the side, his jaw clenched, hands curled into fists, nose flaring with anger. Who the hell did Kirk think she was-
But before he could even think of risking his entire commission- career- Spock was already tossing Kirk across the bridge like a rag doll. All anger vanished from his system replaced by fear and anxiety before he knew it. He took a step forward at the same moment another figure did- Spock’s mother gazing upon the altercation with a placidity Uhura didn’t think was possible when faced with seeing the life being choked from something.
“Spock.” She said, her voice ringing out strong and calm. Spock only tightened her grip, teeth clenched, her dress hiked up so it barely covered the curve of her bottom like she hadn’t heard a word. Her hair, a disheveled black curtain, trembled with the effort bunched in her muscles and pressed into Kirk’s windpipe.
And then as Kirk’s lips began to go slack and purple, Spock let go all at once. Kirk rolled over coughing but Uhura’s attention was solely on Spock as she stood before the doctor-McCoy- and noted her emotional compromisation. Uhura’s feet worked quickly, carrying him around the edges of the bridge to meet Spock before she was able to leave.
“Spock-” He kept his voice low, reaching out just barely to her. Spock just looked at him over her shoulder, drew in a deep breath and blinked away, leaving the bridge with her shoulders hunched.
Uhura clenched his hands there was nothing he could do- to chase after her would be a joke, what could he say? I know what you’re going through? Hardly. He turned back to the bridge; there was work to be done.
“Now we’ve got no captain and no god damn first officer to replace her,” McCoy said, her hands on her hips and face pulled into a scowl.
“Yeah we do,” Kirk smiled wanly pushing her floppy bangs out of her face and sliding into the captain’s chair. Uhura stiffened from where he was watching.
“What?”
“Pike made her first officer,” Sulu -the pilot with the combat training- said, gesturing to Kirk, her pony-tail swinging with the motion. Kirk didn’t belong in a captain’s chair, she never had, but Pike had faith in her for some psychotic reason, and the least Uhura could do was repay the favour Kirk had done him getting him on the bridge.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” McCoy voiced as much as Uhura was thinking and her and Kirk were actually friends. He sighed, shifting his limbs, trying to get used to this idea of Kirk being his Captain. It didn’t sit right with him, he didn’t trust her, respect her like he needed to, but to survive this battle, to prevent Nero from doing any more damage he had to put all his faith in Kirk.
“Thanks for the support.” Kirk muttered, eyes down cast while everyone returned to their stations, Uhura paused as he passed her, unable to keep in his own opinion.
“I sure hope you know what you’re doing, Captain.” He spat the last word unable to overcome the lingering protective instincts- Kirk had hurt Spock intentionally- for that damn chair Now she just had to prove herself or Uhura was going to resume choking her himself.
“So do I.” Kirk glanced up at him earnestly, all joking, and flirtation aside. She was as scared shitless as the rest of them. Uhura pressed his lips together and made his way to his station, he had a job to do whether he liked it or not.
§§§
All he knew was he was following them, following this harebrained plan because it was all they could do. His mother, his father, everyone he’d known would be dead if they didn’t risk this, if Spock didn’t risk this.
He’d initially meant to just check on their communication array, that their frequencies were adjusted and set- but watching Spock stride up to the transporter pad, hips holstered with her phaser something tightened in his chest.
He wasn’t about to go losing her too. He didn’t care what anyone else thought -the transporter technicians, Kirk, that weird Scottish woman- no one was going to take this goodbye away from him.
He stepped up onto the pad before her while she watched. This unique, perfect being, who had taught him so much, who he had thought was impossibly unattainable watching him. His breath whooshed out of his chest and he reached forward, unable to express any of the emotions curling in his inside him, beating at his ribs. Gasping her arms, he slid one hand down and around to her waist and finally kissed her properly. There was no mistaking this for anything other than romantic and Uhura didn’t care, he loved Spock, he loved her and he needed her to know before she left. Their lips parted and he rested his forehead on hers for a moment.
“ I will be back,” She assured him, like he was overreacting about a milk run. He pulled away to look at her seriously, cupping her face in both hands, fingers brushing the points of her ears.
“You’d better be.” He didn’t mean for it to come out so gruff, like a threat, but her eyes just looked knowingly back at him, “I’ll be monitoring your frequency,” he whispered lowering his gaze, letting his hands sink to her neck.
“Thank you, Nyot.” Spock whispered back, leaning into one last fleeting kiss before Uhura pulled away completely, shooting Kirk a warning look as he turned and left the pad.
As he watched the last of the transporter residue fade, he hoped, as hard as he ever had that that girl would come back to him.
§§§
It was twenty-four hours later when he found himself in sickbay. Kirk’s orders, all her ‘alpha shift’ needed to be checked over. Uhura supposed he should be flattered by his promotion, by being in Kirk’s favour, but he wasn’t hurt, he wasn’t in shock, he hadn’t done anything, couldn’t do anything.
He clenched his fingers together as he waited for someone, anyone to give him the once over and sign off on his health. He needed to work, to continue sending out distress signals, to capture the attention of the rest of the fleet, and maybe maybe they’d make it limping back to Earth without becoming victim of any random pirate looking to loot a crippled federation ship.
“ Lieutenant Uhura.” A man, blonde, tall and authoritative called his name and waved him over to a bed. He took a requisite identity scanner to look over his records and then looked up with grave eyes.
“I’m Nurse Chapel. I’ll be looking you over for injuries.”
“I don’t have any injuries, maybe a bruise or two from the hits to the ship but I’m fine.” Uhura resisted rolling his eyes and refused to sit on the bed.
“Good try, I haven’t heard that one before,” Chapel pushed him with two fingers so he backed into the bed and raised his tricorder. Uhura leaned but didn’t sit.
“Seriously-”
“Seriously shut up, Lieutenant. You’re dehydrated and exhausted. Maybe you don’t look like you went ten rounds with a Klingon but you aren’t fine either.” He said sternly, picking up a hypospray from his tray and applying it swiftly.
Uhura kept his mouth shut after that, hoping the quicker he could leave the quicker he could get away from this place and so many people. The sick and injured pressed in on all sides, overflowing the beds that were never supposed to see such devastation- it was too much. After another few moments Chapel finally looked up as he punched in the codes for a new round of scans.
“You’re the Uhura then?” He asked acting like he wasn’t being a gossipy nurse. Uhura blinked at him.
“The Uhura?” He asked skeptically.
“You’re dating Commander Spock.” Chapel looked both impressed and skeptical. Uhura frowned, he was not in the mood for shop-talk, not when so much had happened, not when Spock was in such a state and how dare anyone else bring up something so trivial.
“I’m sorry I didn’t know we were being teenage girls- let me try again.” Uhura fairly snarled, taking satisfaction when Chapel’s tricorder beeped unhappily as he moved.
“ Look I’m sorry, but it’s all they’re talking about.” Chapel gestured to a gaggle of injured female ensigns sitting together in their beds, nursing their cuts and burns as one. He reset his scan and started again.
“It’s none of their business.” Uhura muttered, he could feel his fatigue catching up with him.
“They need something to get their mind off of…everything. Besides, she was an instructor it lends a level of intrigue to it all I guess.” Chapel drifted off for a moment, “ Well, who knows how women think. You pass the exam for now, but you’re off duty or the next twelve hours at least.”
The prospect of so much time with nothing to do had terrified him not so long ago. Now he didn’t even know if he’d make it to his temporary quarters before he passed out. His limbs were heavy as he left sickbay, trudging to the lift and making his way to the belly of the ship.
He tried twice to punch in his access code, fingers clumsy and mind wandering. He couldn’t stop thinking, couldn’t stop feeling, but his body had apparently given up.
Once inside his quarters he was confronted with the sight of Spock, rising from a seat she’d taken by the meager viewing port.
“What’re you-”
“ I abused my commanding offical privileges and overrode your personal access code. You may report my misconduct.” She said with such ease and quickness, like she’d been planning to say it since she first stepped through the door.
“What? Spock.” He shuffled forward. Her eyes jumped from his face to the rest of his body, assessing the way he moved, held himself, breathed, everything.
“You are fatigued I will depart-” She swiftly tried to maneuver around him but he wasn’t about to let her go this time. He caught her around the wrist but didn’t pull, merely held.
“What are you doing here Spock? Why aren’t you with your mother and the others?” He asked unable to fathom her answer at the moment. He wasn’t about to start playing guessing games, not now, not with Spock.
“I was.” She said curtly looking down at his hand on her wrist. He slid his fingers along the sensitive inside crook, just barely brushing where her rank bangles rested on her forearm “ But I found myself…” she looked up at him, “In want of your company.”
“My company.” He huffed, letting her go. He smiled to himself pushing the rest of the way inside to collapse exhaustedly onto his Starfleet issued sofa.
“I find your perspectives on issues of personal and professional nature refreshing, I seek your opinion.” She pulled her arms behind her back and he blinked his eyes closed for a moment seeing nothing but the impressions of photon torpedoes tearing into metal and the screech of battle- he opened them again.
“My opinion.” He blinked up at her.
“Are you of a sufficient mental state? Your persistent repetition is disconcerting.” She cocked her head taking a step closer to him no doubt in the effort to check his pupil dilation. He huffed another raspy laugh, and swallowed at it’s sound, licking his lips unable to fathom truly laughing with joyous abandon again.
“I’m fine, I just came from medical. What did you want to talk about?” he began to toe off his boots kicking them haphazardly to the floor socks soon following. Spock watched his progress with her usual interested expression, but now there was a sense of vagueness to it, a haunted quality in her eyes where amusement had once resided.
“The elders that remain onboard the Enterprise have been discussing the fate of the remaining Vulcans in the universe. They wish to regroup and form a new colony as soon as possible.” She said finally, picking her words carefully. Uhura rolled his neck and stretched out his arms.
“Well, that’s good, isn’t it?” He asked, allowing her to continue while he got comfortable.
“All Vulcans have a duty to return, to assist in the perpetuation of our species, and under certain lethal circumstances re-bonding suitable pairs is first priority.” She said taking another step towards him as he reclined, hands lacing behind his head.
“Right. That also makes sense.” He looked up at her uncomprehending. She pulled her hands out form behind her back and instead laced them together in front of her. That was not a good sign.
“I am not exempt from this duty.” She said at last unable to meet his gaze. Uhura took a slow breath and sat up again placing his bare feet on the floor.
“Half Vulcan is still Vulcan enough.” He sighed dropping his face into his hands, elbows on his knees. He almost couldn’t comprehend it. He’s so tired of this, of the universe throwing curveballs. Pain rose up in the back of his throat and his eyes stung.
“It appears so.” She said taking the seat beside him close enough he felt the heat of her body all along his right side.
“So where does that leave us?” He asked, swallowing hard on the lump in his throat and pulling his face out of his hands. He looked back at her where she is sitting with her usual perfect posture. Her gaze flickered to his and then away again.
“I do not know.”
Uhura looked away, at the flooring, at his hands, at anything but saw nothing. Spock always knew, she always knew and now... he shook his head.
“When was the last time you slept?” He asked finally. She won’t lie to him but he knows she wants to.
“Fifty one point two six hours ago.” Uhura whistled lowly. “Medical has been alerted already but I have found my body most un-willing to-”
“You can’t turn your brain off. I know.” He leaned back and kicked out his legs keeping his hands in his lap. They sat with just the hum of the ship between them for what felt like hours. Uhura couldn’t stop turning over the same questions in his mind, couldn’t go near that angry hurt hole that has been punched in his chest yet. Everything is so sensitive, so tender, he just wanted to sleep, to forget, to have things go back to the way they were.
Spock shifted beside him and he looked at her, the cast of her eyes, the shape of her nose, the way her hair fell over her shoulder. If he couldn’t have her forever, he could have her for the next twelve hours.
He stood and held his hand out to her. She looked up at him and barely hesitated before taking his hand in hers and let him guide her up and to where the barely unpacked mattress waited.
“Lie with me,” He said flopping back, “Just for a while.” He pillowed his head on his arm and watched with tormented satisfaction as she toed off her own boots far more gracefully than he and crawled up to lie beside him.
He rose up on one elbow to look her over and tucked his hand into the pocket of space between her lower back and the bed and sighed.
“My mother told me she married my father because she loved him.” Spock said furrowing her brows slightly, pulling one of her hands up to trace across his cheek, rubbing her knuckles along his lower lip, “I do not know if she told him.”
Uhura hummed, from all he’d heard, his wished he could have met Spock’s father, Adam Grayson sounded like an inspiring man.
“Despite knowing what will be expected of my future…” She breathed blinking slowly, she was trying to say something, desperately fighting to get the words out.
“I must tell you-”
“Shh,” Uhura leaned over her, close enough to press his forehead to hers, to bump her nose with the end of his, “I know.” He kissed the corner of her mouth, one pointed brow tip, the apple of her cheek.
“I know.”