random ramblings
I'm so confused bout everything right now. I don't feel much like myself nemore, well sometimes but only with certain pple. There are so many things that i just ignore and don't deal with. I miss my mom a lot and i really miss being a family. I miss my house, my bedroom, my dogs, my life really.... so much has changed in the last year and i thought maybe it was for the better but maybe not when it comes to family. Living with my dad and living with my mom is so different and i really don't know which is better, i think i might be happier with my dad but there is also a big part of me that feels like something is missing in this lifestyle. I really miss bob too i feel bad he's been so good to me and i really havent done nething but dissapoint him. I barely ever show that i care bout ne of this and always seem to jsut push it aside and ignore it. I don't even go and see my mom and bob that often nemore cause it hurts me to go there and i kno i'm not dealing with this the right way but right now its how i get by to ignore it and just every time i think of it to replace it with another thought. I don't mean to complain cause i do have a good life but sometimes even the best of lives can really get u down and sometimes u just realize a lot of things and realize that not much of it is in your power. I think feeling helpless is prolly my least fave. way to feel and i am helpless in so many situations right now the biggest my family but many others too..... things will get better im sure just right now its rough.... :/